Riverside Girl

It's been two months since Travis left me for tour it honestly has made me depressed all I do is stay home we try to talk as much as we can to each other but lately the conversations have been shorter I understand he's always busy doing interviews , autograph signings , shows its the life style of a artist I don't blame him but I mean he could at least try to talk to me more than once a day you know sometimes not even that I tried to keep myself busy taking up more hours at work hanging with Madelyn helping her through her pregnancy while Tony's away I mean at least he talks to 3-4 times a day to check up on her and the baby if he could do it why can't Travis I tried calling him got sent to his voice mail like always I shut my phone off I was just so pissed I just wanted to talk to him we were doing so great in the beginning of this tour he talked me 24/7 face timed me when he was done with his shows it has been two months since we actually touched each other or kissed but then again he would never do anything to hurt me he made a promise to me that he wouldn't ever I looked down at my ring and smiled this ring gets me through some of the toughest days when I just want to break down and cry I was so consecrated on my thoughts I totally spaced out on the door bell ringing I gathered myself and walked over to open the door it was Madelyn she was getting worrie about me since I never have fun anymore She told me today we were pampering ourselves and that she had a little surprise for me I was kinda excited to know what the surprise was she told me to get dressed and get my but ready in 15 mins cause we had an appointment at the day spa for us both I threw some daisy duke shorts and plain vneck and my cool grey 11's and a grey snapback it was the worst staying in this house letting my mind race so I thought it would be a good idea to get out as much as I can I decide I would drive cause who am I to let my almost 5 month pregnant bestfriend to drive that's rude I got into the drivers seat and we took off we talked about what she wanted the sex of the baby to be and what she would name he or she then she brought up him I started choking up she asked me what was wrong I told her how we've been lacking communications and things aren't the same like I know he's busy but it still sucks she saw that I was getting upset again so she changed the subject in no time we were already driving into the parking lot of the spa we parked and got out we walked into the front door and to my surprise it was Cassie I fucking missed her she was on vacation from school I had no idea I screamed so loud and ran to hug her we stood there jumping and screaming how much we loved each other I asked how how long she was staying for and where she would be staying she insisted she would stay at a hotel but I begged her to stay with me at my house since Travis is gone she asked about him I lied and said everything is fine he's on tour and obviously she went and touched Madeyln's stomach since that was basically our little niece or nephew in there we all sat around waiting for the people to come get us so we could have a girls day 15 mins later they told us we were all set to put on our robs and etc so that is what we did then headed to the pedicure and manicure station of the spa we were we were bring up old memories and good times we had at the house it was sad that I gave that up but it was time move on from that places too many bad memories its crazy in how almost a year things have changed we are all moving on with our lives Cassie's in college and Madelyn is starting a family planning a wedding and then there's me I have my career in cosmetology and my modeling thing going well for me since Travis featured in me in his video my mind wondered back to what Travis was doing why didn't he miss me like I missed him what did I do to deserve this I was so into my thoughts I didn't realize the girls have stopped talking and were just looking at me I asked them what was wrong and of course them being "caring" as they call it they try to talk to me about the situation I just didn't want anyone's opinion cause no one knew what I was going through mentally and physically and emotionally I was just complete with out Travis around I excused myself from the girls and made up an excuse on how I needed to go to the bathroom I took out my phone turned it on and called him couple rings later no answer I hung up tried again couple rings then finally an answer I heard his voice my heart sank into my chest it sounded like he just woke up or something we talked for what it seemed like a few moments until he told me he had to go and he'd try to call me back after his interview or whatever he was doing I trusted him well at least I think I did I knew he wouldn't do anything stupid as long as he told me he loved me everything was going to be okay in my eyes I headed back to the girls so it didn't make it look obvious on what I was doing they were all getting ready to go get our hair washed styled and makeup as much as I love doing my own hair and makeup I love when people do it because it gets tiring as times I can sit back and relax I wanted lose curls in my hair and some more blonde high lights in my hair to touch up my roots couple hours later we were all done it was still early we decide lets go shopping since the girls have another surprise for me tonight I was told I should dress sexy to impress whatever that means we entered the mall of course I had fan girls coming up to me asking me where "T.Mills" is and that they want him all this bullshit of course Cassie started getting annoyed and bitched out the girls I wasn't in the mood to fight but I'm glad she had my back we shook the little girls off our shoulders and proceeded


It's been very hectic since I left Ash back in riverside we tried to keep up with the calling and texting but it just wasn't working all that well she kept getting annoyed that I didn't really have any alone time by myself I started getting busy with interviews and concerts and staying out all night partying with the boys I think I slept about 4 hours this whole tour and I've been on tour for two months which is the crazy part I just take adderall when I feel like I'm started to get tired this whole tour seems like a dream come true I'm out here doing my thing I don't know why Ash would be pissed about it she knew that something like this would eventually happen I just wish she could understand I' doing this for her and us our future together I want to make sure she never worries again but clearly its going the opposite way of what I want.. I was about to text Ash back but got interrupted by some of the groupies one of the young fav's brought back in the bus they all gathered around me trying to talk to me I was already feeling the beers and drinks we were having before the show so I just said fuck it I spoke to them one kept touching my shoulder and trying to get close to me after couple blunts and drinks these girls were already making out with each other I didn't want to do anything I would regret so I headed to the back of the bus by myself into my room I just flopped on the bed trying to get myself to fall asleep which was impossible with the adderall I heard the door open couple mins later it was the girl that kept touching my shoulder before I think her name was Courtney I told her she shouldn't be back here I'm trying to sleep I kept fighting the urge then she just said she just wanted to talk to me alone cause I guess my boy was fucking the girl that was with her so I couldn't say no to her so she laid down on the bed next to me I swear she smelt like Ashton I adjusted myself closer to her so I can be intoxicated with her smell I just let her speak the whole time I didn't realize it but she stopped talking and looked down at me and kissed me I tried to break away but I gave in I missed this contact with someone's skin I just started kissing her back with such passion one thing led to another her clothes were coming off she was sucking me off I pushed her off me then placed myself inside of her it was no Ashton but it satisfied the thirst I was having for sex we went at it for about an hour until she let me bust on her I just rolled over and tried to sleep I didn't bother telling her to leave or not I stood up thinking about the actions I just did and how I fucked this thing up when I promised Ashton I wouldn't by the time I knew it I was knocked out I woke up to tony knocking on my door to wake me up I woke up so fast I looked up to the side of me it was Courtney in one of my tshirts I said shit I gathered my clothes on from last night and opened the door tony looked confused and hurt at the same time I spoke " please don't say anything tony I'll explain tonight" and walked past him to get some fresh air thinking about last night events then she called me its like she knew I took awhile to press the accept button I finally pressed it and waited til she spoke "hello..?" she said I took a deep breath "hey babe whats up" she paused for a second she knew when I was putting on an act she asked me what was wrong I lied and said I don't feel good probably food poising I was hoping she would believe that she believed me and hoped I would feel better reminded her I loved her and can not wait to see her soon at my show in river side she started talking about how we never talk or text the things I promised her I wouldn't be were what I was turning into she didn't appreciate it so we started fighting screaming and all this shit I said fuck this and hung up I put my phone back in my back pocket and went on a walk I didn't know where or how far I wanted to go but it didn't matter at this point I just wanted to get some me time cause I know I'm going to hear it from Tony anyway I know I fucked up but on my walk I came to the realization that I didn't mean to fuck this girl on purpose it was a moment of weakness cause I missed the love of my life so what am I suppose to do? jerk off its not the same without the feeling of my dick inside some wet pussy I aimlessly walked around for about 2 hours before I decide it was time to head back and go be social and live life like it never happened not like I was going to see this girl again anyways you know? I headed back to the bus it was already night time I didn't say much neither did tony the whole night but people know there was something going on because the tension was high when we were all together its bout 2 am and we are all around the front of the tour bus where the sofas are we were drinking which made the tension go away I could say we were all pretty hammered we invited people to come party with us on the bus it was kind of a last night for touring in that state we about over 20 people are in the tour bus we have people dancing drinking laughing and of course girls are there I know tony left because he needed to sober up which was understandable when he was going to be a father soon enough when we get back from tour as I was being tossed another beer small hands wrapped around my waist I was slightly confused because I was pretty hammered and didn't have the slightest clue who it could be I turned around and I have this girl kissing me and throwing herself at me after I got her off me to see who it was it so happened to be that girl from yesterday night I pulled her arm and dragged her outside to know why she was there she must have took it wrong because next thing I know when I reach off the stairs of the bus she pushed up on me and started making out with me I couldn't resist I don't know why this felt so right when it was so wrong I loved Ashton well I still love her but this girl makes me feel alive I don't know what it is but I kept going I increased the kisser even more I couldn't handle the sexual tension in the air between me and her so I brought her to this spot I found on my adventure I had just a few hours ago I shoved her sexually against the wall and started feeling her up I quickly unzipped my pants and processed to push them down she grabbed awhile of my dick I started moaning as she kept stroking me the way she did I couldn't take it no more I pulled up her skirt and entered her harshly she let out a pleasurable yelp as I kept going making sure she felt every inch of me inside her I kept going and so forth on I finally busted and I told her this was our secret and we couldn't tell anyone she kept convincing me she wouldn't but some how I knew this would bite me in the ass eventually we headed back to the party we talked on the way back she took my phone and added her number in it I let her walk in front of me first onto the bus so no one would really notice or question her or me after doing what we just did I walked into the bus and everyone yelled in joy like they never seen me I checked my phone towards the end of the night going into the morning I had 40 unread texts and 20 miscalls I was screwed most were from Ashton screaming at me and calling me all these names I just couldn't take it anymore... Fast forward to the couple weeks after the party on the bus we were heading back to Riverside for a secret show in my hometown I decide after that night back on the party bus I decide to bring Courtney on tour with us she became part of the crew so I made her the merch girl at shows me and her been fucking constantly it was just a good stress reliever when Ashton was yelling at me or pissing me off it wasn't right but after awhile I didn't feel so bad as I did when I first did it I swear I didn't know what I was going to do the day of the concert I haven't seen her in so long I doubt the feelings would be there when she saw me we came home earlier than expected so all of us went to go meet our families and surprise them and what not of course Courtney went with one of the young fav's me and her became wicked close friends from what occurred I liked it she was a go to gal I decide to pick up some flowers and couple of gifts for Ashton cause she has know clue I was coming into town.