Decided to Break It

I noticed Josh quit shivering once he came out of the bathroom. He seemed really jumpy still but better. I convinced him to eat a pancake though he said he wasn’t hungry and after the brunch at the studio, we all went back to his house. He was still acting weird but I didn’t want to keep bothering him. At random times, he would come over to me and hug me like I was going away somewhere and then would go and explore his house. Ali sat next to me on the couch in the living room.

“So… I’ve been talking to Ian a little bit. Something might happen!” She squealed and I smiled at her. “Nice one, ma’am. He’s adorable.” “Don’t I know it. How’d you and Josh happen, by the way?” I giggled before attempting to tell her the whole story. I got to the part where he sung to me before I noticed Kevvy get up and storm out of the house. “Give me a minute?” I followed him out onto the porch and he lit up a cigarette.

“Since when do you smoke?” “There’s a lot you don’t know about me.” He inhaled. “Kevvy… what’s going on?” He shook his head. “Nothing, babe. Nothing at all.” He sat down and I sat next to him. “Kevvy, I…” “Why him?” “What?” “We had something good, I thought, yeah. Why him?” I didn’t know what to say. “You said you couldn’t handle me.” “I never said that.” “You…” “I said it was a lot. I said I’d never been around something like that before.” I didn’t speak. “I’m still crazy about you , Echo.” He grabbed my hand in his and smiled at me. I nearly melted. “I’m with Josh.” I whispered. “He’s gonna hurt you. I know him.” I bit my bottom lip and stood up. “I’m sorry. I can’t.” I got up and walked back into the house.

I kept my eyes down as I made my way to the bathroom in Josh’s bedroom. I couldn’t believe I’d hurt Kevvy that way. I just felt completely sick and needed to make myself throw up. When I got halfway down the stairs to his basement bedroom, I noticed Josh had random piles of money on the bed. “No, no, no.” He muttered to himself as he counted one pile. I wanted to ask what was wrong but I saw that he had jewelry on the bed too. “Only 5. Fuck.” His hands were jittery and his face was still pale. I’d noticed that he looked a lot older than he should be the last few weeks and him being so thin didn’t help at all.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” I asked quietly. He looked up at me and smiled but it looked different. It looked desperate. “I love you. You know that right?” He asked. I walked the rest of the way and hugged him. He kissed my neck and rubbed his hands all over my body. “Josh, no. Everyone’s upstairs.” He kept kissing me. “Josh.” I said more sternly. I tried to push him off but he was way stronger than I was, despite being so much thinner than me. He pushed me on the bed and climbed on top. His breathing was irregular and when he raised his body above mine, his eyes looked wild. He looked scary. He looked like death. “Josh, I’m scared.” I tried to keep my voice calm but inside I was freaking out. His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he started laughing. It scared me. He bent down and kissed me again, a smile broke out on his lips. “I promise I’ll protect you. Forever.” He said quietly.

It was Sunday night and according to our deal, Josh was supposed to stay at my place. But he never came over. I stayed awake so I wouldn’t miss him climbing up the apartment but nothing happened. I didn’t sleep so when my alarm went off, I showered, put my hair in a ponytail and put on some jeans and a t-shirt and hurried out of the house before anyone could say anything to me. I called him 20 times last night and 5 more on the way to school but he never answered the phone. I was starting to get worried. I got to school and everyone was in their normal places around the fence. Amanda was standing further away from Matt, I’m guessing they had a fight and Kevvy wouldn’t make eye contact with me. Mike was in his phone and Ian and Ali were flirting.

“Has anyone seen Josh?” Amanda looked at me and it seemed like she had care in her eyes. “No, why?” Mike asked, looking up from his phone. “He won’t answer my calls and he was supposed to come to my place last night.” Amanda rolled her eyes. “Oh, poor Echo. Josh probably came to his senses and left your fat ass.” “Amanda, shut the fuck up, will you?!” Kevvy yelled at her. Everyone by the fence just stopped and stared at him. He doesn’t cuss much, especially at girls, he told me. I guess this was different. “He’s not answering my calls either.” Matt finally spoke up. I started to bounce on the balls of my feet before he could keep talking. “He’s done this before, Echo. He’ll be okay. I’m sure of it.” He’s done this before? Amanda looked at her phone. “Speak of the devil. Josh just texted me.” I perked up and walked towards her because I needed to know what it said. “Just says to stop texting and calling him. Says he’s okay.” I found out later that was a lie.

The whole day sucked and right after school ended, Matt drove me to Josh’s place. “What do you mean this has happened before?” He shrugged. “He disappears sometimes, but he always comes back… This just… this just seems different.” That didn’t make me feel better. I didn’t go to the front door when we got to his house, but to his bedroom window. I bent down and didn’t see him in there, but noticed that his room was destroyed. The two guitars he had mounted on the wall were gone too. I walked back out front to tell Matt what I saw but he was gone. The block seemed really quiet and eerie. I turned to face the house again and right behind me stood a tall Mexican guy. He wore a tank top and jeans and had tattoos everywhere. “Echo, right? You’re prettier close up.” I stepped back some and when I did, he lunged out and grabbed my arm.