Wounds Heal (Scars Don't)
Chapter Two
Chapter 2
I watched the way his lips lifted up into that beautiful smile. My eyes widened when he met my eyes. “OH MY GOOD GOD HE’S BEAUTIFUL!!!” The voice in my head screamed at me. I noticed I was staring, blushed, and then turned my eyes back onto my desk. Shit. I had an open seat behind me. Well, guess what happened next? The dumb teacher made him sit behind me. Sigh. Now just another person to think I’m weird and call me a freak all because I don’t talk. This was going to be an interesting experience. I glanced up when he walked past, the smell of his cologne filling my senses. This was crazy! He didn’t even know my name, yet he was having this affect on me! I winced at my side, coughing lightly. I did sneeze, cough, sigh, and things like that, just never spoke. That stopped the day my mom started beating me after my dad left. I never once missed him. He was worse than mom ever will be. Sometimes she would help him, but otherwise she was the good parent. All before he left, then that’s when my life turned into a worse hell, considering
I didn’t talk anymore and she beat me, and I have scars on my skin. I shook my head making my thoughts return to the present. I knew I was screwed the moment he sat down behind me. Everyone seemed to stare at him oddly. He was quite the sight. The boy, Damian, seemed to notice the stares and suddenly had a mean look on his face and said, “Don’t you people have anything better than to gawk at me.” He raised an eyebrow, everyone quickly diverting their gazes. He sighed. He noticed me still looking at him, a spark in his eyes, possibly of surprise. He smirked though and said, “What’re you looking at kid?” I just watched him, my grey eyes studying him through the lenses of my glasses. I shook my head and then turned away. Little did I know he was still grinning like a fool from behind myself.
Then I felt a tapping on my shoulder, turning around to see his hazel eyes on me. He then said, “What’s your name?” I watched him carefully, before turning back around and writing on a small smidgen of paper my writing as pretty as a girl’s. “Grey.” It read. Damian smirked and said, “Damian.” I nodded before turning back around, but he made me turn around again, asking this time, for a pencil. I dug in my pocket finding my pen, and handed him my pencil, before turning back around. Now, he was just starting to get annoying because he kept asking me stuff and I’m a bit shy with this. I bit my lip harshly and wished he would just stop asking me things. It was probably funny as hell to watch me though considering. I sighed softly. I winced getting hit in the head with a balled up piece of paper. Now they were just being cruel to me. I stretched a bit. I heard the bell soon ring. I stood, grabbing my backpack as well. I left the classroom, my pencil still lying on the desk. Damian looked at the pencil and grabbed it running after the kid. I blinked feeling someone tap me on the shoulder. I turned around facing Damian again.
The breath caught in my throat. He gave me my pencil back, before asking where his class was. I look at his schedule and wrote down the directions. Thank god, we didn’t have second together. I ran off afterwards. I made it to class and took a big, big, big, big, BIG breath of air. What was he doing to me!? I wasn’t used to this. I felt my cheek heat up. I shook my head. I was in study hall now. I sat down at my desk, and sighed.
I didn’t want to read. I brushed the black hair away from my face. I saw clouds coming over the sun, blocking its rays from coming into the study hall room. I smiled softly. The clouds were grey. Ha. Just like me. I chuckled to myself lightly before setting my head down on the desk. I watched as it soon began to rain. It had a calming affect that, quite frankly, I needed. I sighed not knowing what was happening. I crossed my arms and laid them on the desk, before burying my face in them. I closed my grey eyes and took a deep breath. I let it out after feeling like I had turned blue. I winced softly having forgotten about the bruises. God, my lip hurt. Shit. It was bleeding again.
I reached into my bag, getting tissues out. I held it to my lip and pulled it back away to see it was bleeding again. I held it to my lip. I probably looked pathetic. No one knew though. No one knew that it was hell here and at home. It was probably the worst thing about being me. I couldn’t catch a break. I soon felt closed in. This wasn’t good. I stood up almost to the point of hyperventilating. I had begun to think of what my mom would do to me when I got home. I ran out the door, hearing endless laughs. I bumped into someone, and looked up seeing it was Damian. I shook my head going around him before running out the room. I ran out the building and started run into the woods by the school.
I didn’t stop until I was tripping over the mud in the woods. I had tears running down my face. The teachers were used to my little fits. I had a lot of them. My anxiety got the better of my sometimes and just took over and made it impossible to be close to anyone at all. I finally stopped and coughed and then just fell down on the ground. I breathed. I was on my knees. I let my head fall down and breathed heavily, from the run and from being able to just breathe. I felt the cool rain hit my back. I felt like I burning up. I usually got like this. I soon calmed down. I didn’t lift my head up, just let my already wet hair drip onto my face and down onto the ground. My eyes shut. I had a pair of clothes I kept in my locker just for when I had an anxiety attack like this. That’s what they call it. A anxiety attack. I call it a panic attack. Tomato Tomoto.
Everyone’s got issues. Some just don’t realize it I guess. I can’t help but to notice my own. I finally stood up and wiped my forehead. My hair was dripping wet, great. I coughed softly. I shivered softly. I might as well get back to the hellhole right? I started walking shivering. I got inside, trudging to my locker, getting the new clothes out. I went into the bathroom and changed into the warm and dry clothes. I saw myself in the mirror and winced. Jesus Christ, my wounds were now bruises, but they were bad. The colors blue, black, brown, and purple covered my entire body.
I didn’t wish this on anyone. I looked like a walking artist’s pallet. Pallet or a painting, I couldn’t decide which. I eventually shoved the wet clothes into my locker and walked back to second period. I sat down, laying my head down again. I felt better now that I wasn’t closed in or just burning up hot. The rain had made sure to cool me down. I was very grateful for that. I shivered my hair was still wet. Well, I couldn’t do anything about that. I didn’t have a towel, and I didn’t do gym. Ew. Sweaty guys, sure! Mean sweaty guys? Hell. No. They’d just make fun of me more.
That would be rather embarrassing. I didn’t want to go through that. The last person that was gay here and went through that, it wasn’t pretty. I didn’t band for two years in highschool band, I already had my credit for physical. I was good on that. Ha. Eat that physical effort! I didn’t need anything else having to do with physical body strength. It would just make me hurt more, considering I wouldn’t be used to it, then my mom. That would just make it worse on my body that it already it. I don’t remember how I managed to survive band. It was a mystery. Oh well. The bell rang and I stood up. I walked to third period. I got there, and it showed us who our partners were. I didn’t have one and neither did the new student. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. The new student walked in and said he didn’t have a partner, and the teacher saw me and pointed at me. He looked back at me and nodded back at the teacher.
I could’ve sworn his eyes looked happy about this. I gulped. I didn’t know how I was going to survive. We were in science anyways. The teacher then said the words that probably scared me the most. The lab partners we were assigned to today would be our partners for the whole year. Some people groaned, some smiled and were happy. Me? I was…utterly terrified. First off, I didn’t exactly ‘work’ with others, nor did I talk. How the FUCK was I supposed to do this!? Shit. No, calm down, Grey. I took a deep breath and took the inside of the two person table. I didn’t like the outside, people liked to trip me when I walked by. Damian sat down beside me and gave me a smile before looking back at the teacher. I felt my heart racing and bit my lip.
I had to remind myself to stay calm. I took deep breaths. Our first assignment today: Learn your lab partner. I felt my breath catch in my chest again. She picked the WORST thing for us to do! I want to die. I’ve decided this. I want to go crawl in a hole and just pick at mushrooms for the rest of my life or something! I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye and was surprised to see him looking at me. I then looked back down at the table in front of me. I would do this easily. I will stay calm. I will not talk, like usual. I will complete this assignment. I needed a dry erase board. I just need to keep one in my bag and carry it with me everywhere. Yep. Yep. Yep. The teacher, her name slipped my mind at the moment, wrote things we were supposed to find out about our partner and just list them. Well this shouldn’t be too hard, I guess. I wonder if I could actually do it though, tell him about myself I mean. I sighed softly.
I sneezed softly, and covered my mouth as I did so. I saw blood on my hand and quickly put it back down. Looks like mommy dear apparently caused some inside damage. I’d have to get it looked at. I’d just say I fell down a house and while falling I got caught on the ladder and while I fell it fell on top of my stomach. Yeah, that worked. I blinked out of my daze and shook my head. I really just needed to stop spacing out so much. This was getting really ridiculous to be honest. I popped my neck and felt better. I needed to pull myself together and get this over and done with. Otherwise, it’d never get done. The teacher was still talking to us though explaining directions. How hard was it for us to figure out what we were supposed to do?? Jeez, I could’ve figured it out with you just writing the list out on the board. Well, some, more than other, have a larger brain, I guessed. I blinked when I finally heard her tell us to begin. I glanced over seeing Damian already staring at me. I couldn’t help the blush that crept up onto my cheeks. I cursed at myself in my head not wanting to give myself away so damn easily. “Hey, didn’t you bump into me back there?” He asked amusement in his eyes. My eyes widened.
I watched the way his lips lifted up into that beautiful smile. My eyes widened when he met my eyes. “OH MY GOOD GOD HE’S BEAUTIFUL!!!” The voice in my head screamed at me. I noticed I was staring, blushed, and then turned my eyes back onto my desk. Shit. I had an open seat behind me. Well, guess what happened next? The dumb teacher made him sit behind me. Sigh. Now just another person to think I’m weird and call me a freak all because I don’t talk. This was going to be an interesting experience. I glanced up when he walked past, the smell of his cologne filling my senses. This was crazy! He didn’t even know my name, yet he was having this affect on me! I winced at my side, coughing lightly. I did sneeze, cough, sigh, and things like that, just never spoke. That stopped the day my mom started beating me after my dad left. I never once missed him. He was worse than mom ever will be. Sometimes she would help him, but otherwise she was the good parent. All before he left, then that’s when my life turned into a worse hell, considering
I didn’t talk anymore and she beat me, and I have scars on my skin. I shook my head making my thoughts return to the present. I knew I was screwed the moment he sat down behind me. Everyone seemed to stare at him oddly. He was quite the sight. The boy, Damian, seemed to notice the stares and suddenly had a mean look on his face and said, “Don’t you people have anything better than to gawk at me.” He raised an eyebrow, everyone quickly diverting their gazes. He sighed. He noticed me still looking at him, a spark in his eyes, possibly of surprise. He smirked though and said, “What’re you looking at kid?” I just watched him, my grey eyes studying him through the lenses of my glasses. I shook my head and then turned away. Little did I know he was still grinning like a fool from behind myself.
Then I felt a tapping on my shoulder, turning around to see his hazel eyes on me. He then said, “What’s your name?” I watched him carefully, before turning back around and writing on a small smidgen of paper my writing as pretty as a girl’s. “Grey.” It read. Damian smirked and said, “Damian.” I nodded before turning back around, but he made me turn around again, asking this time, for a pencil. I dug in my pocket finding my pen, and handed him my pencil, before turning back around. Now, he was just starting to get annoying because he kept asking me stuff and I’m a bit shy with this. I bit my lip harshly and wished he would just stop asking me things. It was probably funny as hell to watch me though considering. I sighed softly. I winced getting hit in the head with a balled up piece of paper. Now they were just being cruel to me. I stretched a bit. I heard the bell soon ring. I stood, grabbing my backpack as well. I left the classroom, my pencil still lying on the desk. Damian looked at the pencil and grabbed it running after the kid. I blinked feeling someone tap me on the shoulder. I turned around facing Damian again.
The breath caught in my throat. He gave me my pencil back, before asking where his class was. I look at his schedule and wrote down the directions. Thank god, we didn’t have second together. I ran off afterwards. I made it to class and took a big, big, big, big, BIG breath of air. What was he doing to me!? I wasn’t used to this. I felt my cheek heat up. I shook my head. I was in study hall now. I sat down at my desk, and sighed.
I didn’t want to read. I brushed the black hair away from my face. I saw clouds coming over the sun, blocking its rays from coming into the study hall room. I smiled softly. The clouds were grey. Ha. Just like me. I chuckled to myself lightly before setting my head down on the desk. I watched as it soon began to rain. It had a calming affect that, quite frankly, I needed. I sighed not knowing what was happening. I crossed my arms and laid them on the desk, before burying my face in them. I closed my grey eyes and took a deep breath. I let it out after feeling like I had turned blue. I winced softly having forgotten about the bruises. God, my lip hurt. Shit. It was bleeding again.
I reached into my bag, getting tissues out. I held it to my lip and pulled it back away to see it was bleeding again. I held it to my lip. I probably looked pathetic. No one knew though. No one knew that it was hell here and at home. It was probably the worst thing about being me. I couldn’t catch a break. I soon felt closed in. This wasn’t good. I stood up almost to the point of hyperventilating. I had begun to think of what my mom would do to me when I got home. I ran out the door, hearing endless laughs. I bumped into someone, and looked up seeing it was Damian. I shook my head going around him before running out the room. I ran out the building and started run into the woods by the school.
I didn’t stop until I was tripping over the mud in the woods. I had tears running down my face. The teachers were used to my little fits. I had a lot of them. My anxiety got the better of my sometimes and just took over and made it impossible to be close to anyone at all. I finally stopped and coughed and then just fell down on the ground. I breathed. I was on my knees. I let my head fall down and breathed heavily, from the run and from being able to just breathe. I felt the cool rain hit my back. I felt like I burning up. I usually got like this. I soon calmed down. I didn’t lift my head up, just let my already wet hair drip onto my face and down onto the ground. My eyes shut. I had a pair of clothes I kept in my locker just for when I had an anxiety attack like this. That’s what they call it. A anxiety attack. I call it a panic attack. Tomato Tomoto.
Everyone’s got issues. Some just don’t realize it I guess. I can’t help but to notice my own. I finally stood up and wiped my forehead. My hair was dripping wet, great. I coughed softly. I shivered softly. I might as well get back to the hellhole right? I started walking shivering. I got inside, trudging to my locker, getting the new clothes out. I went into the bathroom and changed into the warm and dry clothes. I saw myself in the mirror and winced. Jesus Christ, my wounds were now bruises, but they were bad. The colors blue, black, brown, and purple covered my entire body.
I didn’t wish this on anyone. I looked like a walking artist’s pallet. Pallet or a painting, I couldn’t decide which. I eventually shoved the wet clothes into my locker and walked back to second period. I sat down, laying my head down again. I felt better now that I wasn’t closed in or just burning up hot. The rain had made sure to cool me down. I was very grateful for that. I shivered my hair was still wet. Well, I couldn’t do anything about that. I didn’t have a towel, and I didn’t do gym. Ew. Sweaty guys, sure! Mean sweaty guys? Hell. No. They’d just make fun of me more.
That would be rather embarrassing. I didn’t want to go through that. The last person that was gay here and went through that, it wasn’t pretty. I didn’t band for two years in highschool band, I already had my credit for physical. I was good on that. Ha. Eat that physical effort! I didn’t need anything else having to do with physical body strength. It would just make me hurt more, considering I wouldn’t be used to it, then my mom. That would just make it worse on my body that it already it. I don’t remember how I managed to survive band. It was a mystery. Oh well. The bell rang and I stood up. I walked to third period. I got there, and it showed us who our partners were. I didn’t have one and neither did the new student. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. The new student walked in and said he didn’t have a partner, and the teacher saw me and pointed at me. He looked back at me and nodded back at the teacher.
I could’ve sworn his eyes looked happy about this. I gulped. I didn’t know how I was going to survive. We were in science anyways. The teacher then said the words that probably scared me the most. The lab partners we were assigned to today would be our partners for the whole year. Some people groaned, some smiled and were happy. Me? I was…utterly terrified. First off, I didn’t exactly ‘work’ with others, nor did I talk. How the FUCK was I supposed to do this!? Shit. No, calm down, Grey. I took a deep breath and took the inside of the two person table. I didn’t like the outside, people liked to trip me when I walked by. Damian sat down beside me and gave me a smile before looking back at the teacher. I felt my heart racing and bit my lip.
I had to remind myself to stay calm. I took deep breaths. Our first assignment today: Learn your lab partner. I felt my breath catch in my chest again. She picked the WORST thing for us to do! I want to die. I’ve decided this. I want to go crawl in a hole and just pick at mushrooms for the rest of my life or something! I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye and was surprised to see him looking at me. I then looked back down at the table in front of me. I would do this easily. I will stay calm. I will not talk, like usual. I will complete this assignment. I needed a dry erase board. I just need to keep one in my bag and carry it with me everywhere. Yep. Yep. Yep. The teacher, her name slipped my mind at the moment, wrote things we were supposed to find out about our partner and just list them. Well this shouldn’t be too hard, I guess. I wonder if I could actually do it though, tell him about myself I mean. I sighed softly.
I sneezed softly, and covered my mouth as I did so. I saw blood on my hand and quickly put it back down. Looks like mommy dear apparently caused some inside damage. I’d have to get it looked at. I’d just say I fell down a house and while falling I got caught on the ladder and while I fell it fell on top of my stomach. Yeah, that worked. I blinked out of my daze and shook my head. I really just needed to stop spacing out so much. This was getting really ridiculous to be honest. I popped my neck and felt better. I needed to pull myself together and get this over and done with. Otherwise, it’d never get done. The teacher was still talking to us though explaining directions. How hard was it for us to figure out what we were supposed to do?? Jeez, I could’ve figured it out with you just writing the list out on the board. Well, some, more than other, have a larger brain, I guessed. I blinked when I finally heard her tell us to begin. I glanced over seeing Damian already staring at me. I couldn’t help the blush that crept up onto my cheeks. I cursed at myself in my head not wanting to give myself away so damn easily. “Hey, didn’t you bump into me back there?” He asked amusement in his eyes. My eyes widened.