She's Not Afraid

Anna’s P.O.V
I woke up to my phone blaring music in my ear. I looked to see who was calling me. QUINN flashed on the screen.

“QUINN?! Holy shit, how are you?” I said excitedly.
“Hey sis, calm yourself.” He chuckled.
“I haven’t talked to you since I moved with dad. How are you?” I asked more calmly.
“I’m well, yourself?” He asked.
“Actually, a lot better. What’s up?” I started to get skeptical. He hasn’t called me in years.
“It’s dad…he’s in the hospital. He had a massive stroke and they don’t think he’ll make it.” He sounded like he was about to cry.
“Quinn…you know how I feel about mum and dad…” I said slowly.
“Anna, it’s your own father. The least you can do is come support Reilly, Garvan and I.” He snapped.
“Fine. Which hospital?” I sighed.
“Midland Regional Hospital.” He stated. Shit, I haven’t been to Ireland in four years…
“Okay, I’ll book a flight and be there in a day or two.” I stated.
“Thank you, Anna, love you.”
“Love you too, Quinn. Tell Garvan and Reilly I love them as well.” I smiled a little.
“Will do.” With that I hung up.

“What was that about?” Louis asked, looking at me strangely.
“I have to go to Ireland for a bit.” I said, not looking at him.
“Why?” He asked.
“My dad’s dying.” I stated.
“I’m sorry.” Louis pulled me into a hug.
“I’m only going to support my brothers. I don’t give a rats ass about my father.” I said and hugged him back. I need to pack. I need to book a flight.
“I’ll book you a red eye flight, you go pack.” Louis smiled at me and walked out of the room to get his laptop. I practically lived at Louis’s flat. I haven’t been in mine since I was in the psych ward.
“I don’t have any suitcases or duffle bags here!” I whined.
“Use one of mine!” Louis yelled from downstairs.
“I’M TOO SHORT TO REACH THEM!” I yelled, attempting to grab the small purple one on the top shelf. I was soon hoisted into the air and was able to reach.
“Better love?” Louis chuckled.
“I’m sorry I’m tiny!” I stuck my tongue out at him. He rolled his eyes and kissed me.
“Pack.” He ordered.
“Yes sir!” I fake saluted him and started throwing things into my bag. Louis came back with two tickets and a receipt for a hotel.
“Louis…you didn’t have to buy me everything…I am capable of paying for all of that.” I sighed as he handed me the papers.
“So? I already did it.” He stated as I finished packing the last of my things. I grabbed my laptop bag and was ready to go. It was five o’clock and Louis was able to book me a flight for eight forty-five tonight. My phone started going off again, this time GARVAN flashed across the screen.

“Hey Garvan! What’s up?” I asked.
“Quinn told me you’re flying in! Why don’t you bring that boyfriend of yours so we can meet him?” He asked, I heard him crack his knuckles.
“Garvan, you couldn’t beat up a fly even if you tried. But are you sure you’d want me too under these circumstances?” I asked. Louis raised an eyebrow.
“Yes, Reilly wants to meet him too. Quinn wants to shoot him.” Garvan chuckled.
“Alright let me ask him.” I rolled my eyes and pulled the phone away from my face, covering the bottom.
“Want to come with me? I could use the support.” I asked Louis. He held up the other sheet of paper.
“Already planned on it.” He smirked.
“He’s coming.” I said to Garvan.
“Awesome. Is he going to meet mum?” He asked.
“Depends…doubt it though. Mum hates anybody I can talk too.” I sighed.
“She’s changed.” He sighed.
“Fine.”
“Hey, when’s your flight?” He asked.
“8:45 tonight.” I said.
“Awesome. Need me to pick you up at the airport?” He asked.
“Um that’d be great unless Lou rented a car too and didn’t tell me.” I looked at him. He gave me a sheepish grin. “Never mind…he did.”
“He spoils you, doesn’t he?” Garvan chuckled.
“I don’t deserve it…but yes he does.” I smiled.
“Love ya sis. Bye.”
“Love you too.” I hung up.

“Looks like you’re coming to Ireland to meet my brothers.” I sighed.
“Yep! Let’s go!” Louis chuckled and grabbed his bag that he packed while I was on the phone. I grabbed my two bags and we left.

One flight later

Louis and I got our bags and found the car.
“Louis, you didn’t have to go all out with this.” I sighed.
“Too bad, you deserve it.” He chuckled and threw our stuff in the back.
“You sure you want to meet my brothers? They can be a little…insane.” I laughed.
“Like you? I can definitely handle them.” He smirked.
“Oh look at me, I’m the sass master!” I mimicked him.
“Hey!” He pouted.
“I love you.” I said for the first time in about a month.
“I love you too.” He smiled and rubbed my knee.

When we pulled up to the hotel, I sighed. It wasn’t a fancy hotel, it was a regular one, and it was right by the hospital.
“Alright, let’s get our key, get our stuff upstairs then go.” He said.
“Okay.” I smiled.
“Hi, how may I help you?” The lady at the front desk didn’t even bother lifting her head.
“Room reservation for Tomlinson.” Louis said.
“Yep, right here. You’re rooms ready, here’s the keys, enjoy your stay.” She never once looked up.
“Thank you.” We both said and went to the elevator.
“Rude much?” I said, pressing the button for our floor.
“Don’t worry, I’ve dealt with worse.” Louis laughed. The elevator dinged, indicating we reached our destination. Louis was still carrying my bags plus his. Now it wasn’t much, but I still felt bad.
“Louis, give me my stuff to carry.” I said.
“We’re already at our room, plus I don’t mind.” He opened the door, and let me in first, I held the door for him. Once he placed our stuff down, I pulled out my phone and texted Reilly.

Me: Hey bro, we just go into our hotel, what rooms he in?
Reilly: ICU 312. Hurry. He doesn’t have much longer, he wants to speak to you anyway.

I felt myself get anxious.
“Louis, we have to get to the hospital.” I stated.
“Okay, let’s go.” He didn’t question me. He grabbed the room key and the key for the rental car and we rushed out.

At the hospital

We rushed to the ICU, I saw Garvan waiting outside. He looked so much different. So grown up.
“Garvan!” I ran up to him and hugged him. He squeezed me.
“Anna, I’ve missed you so much!” He whispered.
“How’s dad?” I asked. I found myself more upset than I probably should be.
“He wants to talk to you.” He stated. Then his eyes drifted behind me. I turned around, he was staring intently at Louis.
“Garvan, Louis, Louis, Garvan.” I made a short introduction. They both shook hands.
“Pleasure to meet you.” Garvan smiled.
“Pleasure to meet you as well.” Louis smiled back. I let them stay out there and I walked into the room. There in the hospital bed, lay the man that made my life hell. He hurt me verbally, emotionally and physically. Now he’s on his death bed.
“Hi dad.” I said awkwardly.
“Anna…come here.” He said softly. I hesitantly walked over to him and sat down in the chair. Reilly left along with Quinn. I studied my dad’s face. He looked so much older…his face was sunken in and he was a lot paler.
“How do you feel?” I asked, breaking the silence.
“I wanted to apologize for making your life hell. I don’t know if your mother will, but I am truly sorry. If I do die, I don’t want to regret not telling you how truly sorry I am.” He ignored my question. I sat in shock.
“Nothing…nothing can change the past dad...I won’t be able to forget…but I will forgive. The best I can at least.” I found myself saying.
“I know Anna. I am sorry. I love you.” He grabbed my hand and squeezed it. He never told me he loved me.
“I-I love you too…daddy.” I was tearing up. He slowly began to close his eyes. The heart monitor raced and then went to a steady beep. He was dead… “Goodbye daddy.” I kissed his forehead and walked out.

“What’d he tell you?” Quinn asked.
“He apologized…” I looked down. I was crying by this point.
“Well are you two okay?” Reilly asked.
“Dad passed on…he waited to apologize to me…then he died…” By this point, Louis had made his way to my side and was holding me. I heard Reilly run into the room, followed by Quinn. Garvan stayed.
“Anna, he’s wanted to apologize for a while now.” Garvan smiled a little.
“I know. I just wasn’t ready.” I sighed, wiping my eyes. Reilly came out, tears streaming down his face, followed by Quinn who was emotionless.
“I’ll let a nurse know.” Garvan walked off. I went over and hugged both Reilly and Quinn. They practically squeezed the life out of me.
“I’ll make the funeral arrangements.” Quinn volunteered.
“No, dad never wanted a funeral, he wanted to be cremated.” Reilly reminded him. Quinn nodded.
“Hey sis, you never introduced us to dis bloke!” Quinn tried to make light of the situation.
“Oh; Quinn, Reilly, this is Louis, my boyfriend. Louis, this is Quinn and Reilly.” I made the introductions. They all nodded at each other.
“Anna…what happened to your arms?” Garvan asked, coming back with the doctor and a few nurses. Quinn and Reilly went in with them. Louis pushed me back a little and looked me over for any new cuts. I haven’t cut in months now. But he still checks. Once he saw nothing new, he brought me back into him, acting as if nothing happened.
“I used to self-harm. But Louis over here, put me back in a mental hospital and I got better this time. No more eating disorder, for the most part, and no more cutting.” I beamed. I was proud of myself. I started playing guitar again. It took away the urge. I could make my fingertips hurt, and it wasn’t a bad thing!
“Anna…” Garvan sighed, shaking his head disapprovingly.
“Shut up. You weren’t the one that suffered the abuse.” I said jeeringly.
“Hey, hey I am glad you’re in recovery. I just wish I could have been dere for you more. I suck at being a brother.” He looked down. I sighed, pried myself out of Louis’s death grip and hugged Garvan.
“Shut your face, you can’t help that you’re amazingly smart and got into Trinity College.” I giggled. He laughed and hugged me back. Then pulled away and looked at my arms.
“I’m sorry you felt dat you had to do dat.” He hugged me again. I sighed and hugged him tightly.
“We’re going to visit mum tomorrow, yer comin’ right?” Reilly asked. I just nodded.