On Your Side

Once in her room Jenna fell onto her bed, her thoughts filled with Eric, his laughter and the way he smelled. This feeling felt so familiar and yet it excited her. The simple thought of him made her smile now.

Before she got too lost in thought her phone rang and she placed it to her ear immediately.

"Hello?"

"Well, hello." John's voice filled her ear and she sat up instantly.

"John."

"Nooo...." He responded sarcastically and she rolled her eyes although he couldn't see.

"Funny. What's up?"

"Just went to pick up some food."

"Kind of late isn't it?"

"It's only 10, old woman."

She chuckled, "So you went to pick up some food and why are you telling me this?"

"Well, for your smart ass infomation, I was going to see if I could pick you up as well."

"Food does sound appealing."

"Who said it was for you?"

"You can't lurer me in with food and then not supply it."

John let out a laugh, "Get your ass outside. I'm almost there."

Jenna laughed as she hung up and grabbed her bag before flying down the stairs. Garrett didn't question her this time which she was thankful for, but she knew it was probably because he already knew where she was going.

Once John pulled up she hopped in, his truck now smelling like Mexican food.

"Tacos. Yesss."

"Have you not eaten today?!" He asked chuckling as she dug into one of the bags.

"Well now that I think about it, no. I haven't."

"What? Why?!"

"Just forgot." She mumbled out through a mouth full of taco.

"Eric can't feed you now?"

"I didn't ask him to."

John rolled his eyes, "So how was it?"

"Good actually. I love those guys. They are hilarious."

"Yeah..." John stated as he pulled into his driveway. Talking about Eric wasn't really on his list of things to do.

"You and Eric aren't talking, are you?" She asked as they entered his house.

"No, we're not."

"Because of me?" She asked and he sighed as he fell onto the couch.

"No Jen, because of me. Because I have feelings for you and I shouldn't because he's my best friend."

She bit her lip as she stared at the boy.

"You have feelings for me..." She said outloud although it was more to herself than to him.

"Is it that surprising? I did kiss you this morning."

"Yeah, I just thought..."

John shook his head, "Jenna, I have had feelings for you for years."

"Why-why didn't you tell me?"

"It never mattered. You had Eric."

She frowned as he rubbed his hand down his cheek unsure if he should be telling her this.

"John..."

"Can we not? I mean, I don't want to talk about it. You know now. Let's just leave it at that."

She nodded slowly and he dug into the bag of food as a distraction even if he was unsure if he would be able to keep it down. She made herself sit down and he paid more attention than necessary to his food.

"Like I told Eric, Jenna. I'm not taking advatange of the situation or trying to get you to be with me. It is what it is and whatever decision you make will be your own." He stated before leaving her alone in the living room. Decisions? Did she have to make those so soon? She barely had herself figured out right now.

She finally got up and went looking for him only to find him brushing his teeth in just a pair of basketball shorts. He tried his best to ignore her and once he was done he slid by her and she shut the door. A sigh escaped his lips as he fell onto his bed. He didn't know why he was acting this way towards her. It wasn't her fault. He was just upset with himself really. She wasn't to blame for his problems.

Once she emerged in pajamas she climbed in beside him and he turned to look at her.

"I'm not mad you know? I just, I know you're going through a lot but you have no idea how hard this is for me." He whispered.

"I'm sorry. I had no idea. I feel horrible." She stated. She honestly felt bad and even a bit upset that he was hurting so much before of her.

"Don't. It isn't your fault."

"But it is..."

"No it's not. I promise." He whispered, bringing his hand to her cheek.

"Maybe we shouldn't hang out..."

"Do you want that?" He questioned and she sighed, "No, but I don't want you to hate to be around me either!"

"I don't hate being around you. In fact, I love being around you. Don't you get it, Jenna? I am without a doubt, whole heartedly in love with you." He stated, hovering over her and her breathing immediately stopped from his words alone.

"No matter what you feel for me, I'd rather have you as I do right now then not at all. Even if it kills me in the end." He added, closing the gap between their lips, "Because I love you and waking up each morning with you in my arms has made me happier than I thought possible."

Her breathing was now irregular and she could feel his breath on her lips, lingering over hers as if he didn't know what to do. She grasped the back of his shirt and he crashed his lips to hers. He had never kissed a girl like this that he was sure of. He didn't even know he possessed such passion.

"Don't get my hopes up, Jenna. Just be straight up with me, ok? I can handle it. I know you're confused and I get that. I do, but if ever you find yourself feeling what you felt for Eric before, let me know so I can back off. I mean it. I'll be fine."

She simply nodded as he stared at her with such confusion in his eyes. Sadness and happiness all wrapped into one. Even he didn't know how it was possible.

She reached up, brushing his cheek with her fingers. John shut his eyes taking in the feeling of her touch. He was in such a mess and he didn't even care.

"I do love you. I have and as messed up as this is, it feels great to finally get that off my chest." He whispered touching his forehead to hers.

She ran her fingers through his hair and he kissed down her cheek before laying on his own pillow. Jenna honestly wanted to tell him she felt the same, but she wasn't sure and then there was Eric. Her feelings were still jumbled and she didn't want to make things worse for John.

"I wish you didn't John." She whispered.

John laughed softly, "Yeah, well I wish I didn't either, but some things we have no control over."

"I know. I just hate that you've been hurting because of this...because of me..." she stated turning on her side to face him.

"Jenna, it isn't like that at all. I really don't know how to put it into words. It's amazing and horrible all at the same time. You haven't hurt me, baby. I've done this to myself."

"Doesn't make me feel better..." She mumbled and he chuckled, pulling her closer, "Well, what will?"

"Can I just go back to a coma. It wasn't too bad. Less complicated."

John shook his head with a grin, "Afraid not. Plus, why have a dream version of me when you can have the real thing, baby?" He joked causing her to giggle.

"No you didn't..."

Laughter left his lips, "Oh yeah. I said it."

She shook her head with a smile, "You're something else O'Callaghan."

"Yeah, well, what can I say?"

She smiled as she stared into his green eyes and he quickly kissed her, "Get some sleep. It's getting late and in a few days you'll be going back to school."

She groaned pressing her face into his chest, "What if I don't want to?"

"You have no choice."

"I don't like anyone there."

"You have that Alex kid. I'm sure he still has a thing for you."

"I hate you."

He laughed wrapping her in his arms, "Won't be bad. Only a few months left anyways."

"I know, just sucks and I don't know if I'm ready to drive..."

"Oh Eric basically took you and picked you up everyday anyways so..."

She looked up at him and he sighed, "What?"

"So I should ask him?"

"Are you wanting me to? Is that the problem here?" He asked, a smirk on his lips and she rolled her eyes, "No."

"Because if you ask I'll say yes."

"I'm not asking you."

"But you want to." He replied playfully.

"No I don't."

"Yes you do. So ask."

"Nope. I'm asking Eric." She stated, flipping onto her other side, looking away from the boy.

John chuckled and slid his arm around her waist, pulling her until her back hit his chest.

"I'll do it, ok?" He whispered against her ear.

"But you don't want to."

"I don't recall saying that."

"You basically did."

He smiled although she couldn't see it from how they were laying. He loved their flirty banter. It just filled his hope to the brim really which he didn't know if that was a good thing or not.

"Jenna, I want to, ok? Seeing you twice a day isn't the worst thing I could possibly think up."

"Yeah, but you'll have to get up early."

"It's not like I can't come back and go back to sleep."

"You sure?"

"I am positive. Let me do this."

"Ok." She whispered and he kissed her jaw, "Get some sleep ladybug. We will work out the details later."

"Fine." She mumbled finding herself tired anyways.

He kissed her cheek once more before cuddling her to him.

"Sweet dreams." He whispered and that was the last thing she heard before she drifted to sleep. Maybe she was falling into the real life version of her dream, but she couldn't help that it felt so right.