The Diary of Mari Delrous: The Beginning of the Second
MARCH 2012
MARCH
1ST MARCH 2012
So…cold….why does loosetown feel so cold…
So today during orientation class I found a lot of jobs I want to do from the matchmaker.
I have fifteen jobs and I love all of them. I seriously would want to do all of those jobs but my teacher told me it was impossible and I can only stick to one….damn reality hurts.
TUESDAY March 13th 11:22 pm
I’ve got the schedule. Tight.
There’s report cards coming soon and hell, I’ll be missing a lot of school. There’s my surgery on the 27th.
Oh god oh god oh god I’m sort of scared.
They are going to take off my braces for the surgery, and put them back on. Not to mention needles are surely to be involved. I might be asleep but I’m sure ill feel something in the end. And even worse my friends are partying without me and my dubstep guitar solo I was working on ALLL YEAR for cefou.
And I’ll be there….at the hospital…alone picturing everyone that I haven’t seen in a year and I was so excited to see again…
Crying my fucking eyes out and hopefully to drown in my own tears so I can quit all the pain.
THEN we fly to Faxton for the house hunting. And then I have to move two weeks before school ends so I’ll have to do my exams early. Yep imp screwed. Not only that since my teacher was on maternity league until the new year, none of us in class did any work in most of our classes due to a seriously slacky teacher who would let us play on our ipods and trash the class for the first four months so we already have a lot of work to do.
I hate everything.
I wish I didn’t but the truth is I actually don’t hate everything.
I just hate myself.
Why do I exist? What good am I to the world? This world that’s so corrupted. I want to be four again when the world had color.
That’s all gone now. I hate us a humans, so I hate myself.
Ive been very slow in drawing lately. Sort of saddens me but its been nothing but math math math. FUCK MATH really. I know I need it but I have limited time to become maniarix at a young age. Don’t slow me down.
Anyway on the bright side
I talked to Mark again. I learned there may be a chance when I get back that he could be my neighbor. When I told him….
“Hey I hear you have a neighbor selling his house….”
His reaction: ?!?! SERIOUSLY?! BUY THE HOUSE OMG BUY IT ILL DO ANYTHIIING THERES NOBODY HERE OMG PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BEG YOUR PARENTS OMG!!!”
Hahaha im not even overreacting that’s exactly how he said it! I was like: VICTORY!!
His neighborhood sounds nice though. It would be cool we were both like oh my god we could sit on the bus together even though we wouldn’t talk in it cause he’s like me. Doesn’t matter what time of day it is we are quiet on the bus. We were happy because not many people have that trait but we both do.
“Id take this time just to be quiet with yooouuu!” –Lights, quiet.
Oh and the other day he said the cutest thing!
MARK: I just had the urge to hug you. O,O
ME: lol wa?
MARK: I don’t know why but if you were here I would so hug you.
And then we got into this funny conversation and he promised hed give me surprise hugs when I get back like in the middle of classes, in the hallway, graduation speech surprise hugs.
Oh Mark that’s why were friends right? Your awesome!
It’d be fun to chill in the bus with you. And listen to our ipods singing fantastic baby! HAHA I showed him that song by big bang. He even bought it off itunes cause he loves the boom shakalaka apparently. Awesome!
March 27th
This has got to be the worst experience of my life so far.
I feel so damned deceived they never let me in on the parts I could have been readily prepared; BUT NOOOO let Mari have the urge to rip the world to shreds if only she had the ability to do it.
The whole surgery thing was a little scary at first when they brought me in the room and lied me on the creepy asylum looking table, it was like you’re in a conversation with these guys and then BAM your knocked out and you don’t even know it. Then you wake up with some lady and they roll your bed to a room with another sorry person. I feel so sorry for anyone who has to put up with these things.
Anyway they put thousands of elastics on my teeth. It’s the worse because they jam your teeth together preventing you from eating and slightly drinking at points. The elastics make it so hard for me to even think of opening my jaw. I can’t even speak. And I can barely fit a straw in between.
And then there’s my face. Which is….swelled up….like….HUGE…and iit also has blue spots because they make you put ice on it for hours but it….hurts your skin….alot….and I just cant speak anymore.
But even if I could speak. I’m pretty lonely here. Sure my parents visit a little but how am I supposed to talk to them? I mean I do and all its just that I don’t even know how to explain…
Anyway im pretty sure im gonna suffer some anorexia. I seriously can’t eat their putting these liquid needles that they put in my mouth for anti-biotics. And it’s actually really Gross. Anyway I took a pic of my hand full of wires and tubes all over it and posted it on facebook asking how cefous going and well. I got kinda disappointed. Some of my friends said it sucked but then this one girl said it was amazing, then the other guy commented again “Don’t say its awesome like it was, she’ll get jealous!”
I’m missing the last time of my life right now….
MARCH 30TH
Im home now but this thing gets worsened by time if you ask me. I took a 24 miserable hour nap but of course my mother would interrupt me like
MARI TIME TO TAKE YOUR SHITTY ANTI BIOTIQUE MEDICINE NOW!!!! MARI YOU HAVE TO DRINK THIS LIQUID MEAL THAT YOU CANT EVEN FIT THE STRAW IN YOUR MOUTH! NO I WONT LISTEN TO HOW IT WONT WORK!!! MARI QUIT GIVING ME THAT LOOK LIKE YOU HATE ME!!!!!
AGAIN MOTHER, that’s not it. I just cant move my mouth the other way…..She always think im disrespecting her by my serious look. Maybe if I were to hate you mom, it would be for that reason.
How come she doesn’t at least leave these nothing details like dad does? I mean sometimes I guess hed be like stop the attitude but its like, Mom usually starts the assault and offence thinking that’s a defence.
Dad usually does the defences but rarely verbally assaults like my mother. Instead hes a little more peacefull and persuasive with solutions for example:
Mother brings me soup that I cant even eat:
“Mari you have to eat your soup!!!” She says in a demanding voice.
When dad comes to bring me soup that I cant even eat:
“Mari in order to heal faster you’re gonna have to eat your soup. I know you don’t want to and its hard but I can’t give you much other choice.”
Now who would you rather listen to in this case?
1ST MARCH 2012
So…cold….why does loosetown feel so cold…
So today during orientation class I found a lot of jobs I want to do from the matchmaker.
I have fifteen jobs and I love all of them. I seriously would want to do all of those jobs but my teacher told me it was impossible and I can only stick to one….damn reality hurts.
TUESDAY March 13th 11:22 pm
I’ve got the schedule. Tight.
There’s report cards coming soon and hell, I’ll be missing a lot of school. There’s my surgery on the 27th.
Oh god oh god oh god I’m sort of scared.
They are going to take off my braces for the surgery, and put them back on. Not to mention needles are surely to be involved. I might be asleep but I’m sure ill feel something in the end. And even worse my friends are partying without me and my dubstep guitar solo I was working on ALLL YEAR for cefou.
And I’ll be there….at the hospital…alone picturing everyone that I haven’t seen in a year and I was so excited to see again…
Crying my fucking eyes out and hopefully to drown in my own tears so I can quit all the pain.
THEN we fly to Faxton for the house hunting. And then I have to move two weeks before school ends so I’ll have to do my exams early. Yep imp screwed. Not only that since my teacher was on maternity league until the new year, none of us in class did any work in most of our classes due to a seriously slacky teacher who would let us play on our ipods and trash the class for the first four months so we already have a lot of work to do.
I hate everything.
I wish I didn’t but the truth is I actually don’t hate everything.
I just hate myself.
Why do I exist? What good am I to the world? This world that’s so corrupted. I want to be four again when the world had color.
That’s all gone now. I hate us a humans, so I hate myself.
Ive been very slow in drawing lately. Sort of saddens me but its been nothing but math math math. FUCK MATH really. I know I need it but I have limited time to become maniarix at a young age. Don’t slow me down.
Anyway on the bright side
I talked to Mark again. I learned there may be a chance when I get back that he could be my neighbor. When I told him….
“Hey I hear you have a neighbor selling his house….”
His reaction: ?!?! SERIOUSLY?! BUY THE HOUSE OMG BUY IT ILL DO ANYTHIIING THERES NOBODY HERE OMG PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BEG YOUR PARENTS OMG!!!”
Hahaha im not even overreacting that’s exactly how he said it! I was like: VICTORY!!
His neighborhood sounds nice though. It would be cool we were both like oh my god we could sit on the bus together even though we wouldn’t talk in it cause he’s like me. Doesn’t matter what time of day it is we are quiet on the bus. We were happy because not many people have that trait but we both do.
“Id take this time just to be quiet with yooouuu!” –Lights, quiet.
Oh and the other day he said the cutest thing!
MARK: I just had the urge to hug you. O,O
ME: lol wa?
MARK: I don’t know why but if you were here I would so hug you.
And then we got into this funny conversation and he promised hed give me surprise hugs when I get back like in the middle of classes, in the hallway, graduation speech surprise hugs.
Oh Mark that’s why were friends right? Your awesome!
It’d be fun to chill in the bus with you. And listen to our ipods singing fantastic baby! HAHA I showed him that song by big bang. He even bought it off itunes cause he loves the boom shakalaka apparently. Awesome!
March 27th
This has got to be the worst experience of my life so far.
I feel so damned deceived they never let me in on the parts I could have been readily prepared; BUT NOOOO let Mari have the urge to rip the world to shreds if only she had the ability to do it.
The whole surgery thing was a little scary at first when they brought me in the room and lied me on the creepy asylum looking table, it was like you’re in a conversation with these guys and then BAM your knocked out and you don’t even know it. Then you wake up with some lady and they roll your bed to a room with another sorry person. I feel so sorry for anyone who has to put up with these things.
Anyway they put thousands of elastics on my teeth. It’s the worse because they jam your teeth together preventing you from eating and slightly drinking at points. The elastics make it so hard for me to even think of opening my jaw. I can’t even speak. And I can barely fit a straw in between.
And then there’s my face. Which is….swelled up….like….HUGE…and iit also has blue spots because they make you put ice on it for hours but it….hurts your skin….alot….and I just cant speak anymore.
But even if I could speak. I’m pretty lonely here. Sure my parents visit a little but how am I supposed to talk to them? I mean I do and all its just that I don’t even know how to explain…
Anyway im pretty sure im gonna suffer some anorexia. I seriously can’t eat their putting these liquid needles that they put in my mouth for anti-biotics. And it’s actually really Gross. Anyway I took a pic of my hand full of wires and tubes all over it and posted it on facebook asking how cefous going and well. I got kinda disappointed. Some of my friends said it sucked but then this one girl said it was amazing, then the other guy commented again “Don’t say its awesome like it was, she’ll get jealous!”
I’m missing the last time of my life right now….
MARCH 30TH
Im home now but this thing gets worsened by time if you ask me. I took a 24 miserable hour nap but of course my mother would interrupt me like
MARI TIME TO TAKE YOUR SHITTY ANTI BIOTIQUE MEDICINE NOW!!!! MARI YOU HAVE TO DRINK THIS LIQUID MEAL THAT YOU CANT EVEN FIT THE STRAW IN YOUR MOUTH! NO I WONT LISTEN TO HOW IT WONT WORK!!! MARI QUIT GIVING ME THAT LOOK LIKE YOU HATE ME!!!!!
AGAIN MOTHER, that’s not it. I just cant move my mouth the other way…..She always think im disrespecting her by my serious look. Maybe if I were to hate you mom, it would be for that reason.
How come she doesn’t at least leave these nothing details like dad does? I mean sometimes I guess hed be like stop the attitude but its like, Mom usually starts the assault and offence thinking that’s a defence.
Dad usually does the defences but rarely verbally assaults like my mother. Instead hes a little more peacefull and persuasive with solutions for example:
Mother brings me soup that I cant even eat:
“Mari you have to eat your soup!!!” She says in a demanding voice.
When dad comes to bring me soup that I cant even eat:
“Mari in order to heal faster you’re gonna have to eat your soup. I know you don’t want to and its hard but I can’t give you much other choice.”
Now who would you rather listen to in this case?