This Is How I Disappear

The door bell rang through the house faintly. I took off my headphones and went to greet whoever may be at the door. I opened the front door and stared in shock at the state of my usually peppy, smiling friend. "Wow, Mikey... You look like shit... Rough night with the ladies?" I smirked, knowing that wasn't the case. He just pushed past me and I realized that something was wrong. He walked to the living room and plopped down onto the couch, as if his knees had turned to jello and he could no longer support his own weight. I sat next to him, hoping he was willing to give some answers. "Mikes, what's going on?" He ran a hand through his tussled hair. It was clear that he had been doing that a lot.

"Didn't get any sleep last night. Stayed in the ER with Gerard all night," he said, sounding almost hollow. "Almost drank himself to death." He chuckled with disdain. I sighed, not knowing what there was for me to say to make the situation any better. "That's the third visit to the hospital in the last two weeks..." I nodded slowly, realizing that his brother's path of self-destruction was worsening as time went on. I didn't know much about his family, even though we'd been friends since the seventh grade. What little I did know about his brother spoke very poorly of him. He had few, if any, friends. He spent most of his time alone in his room. When I went over to visit, he rarely came out of his hiding place. His parents were kind, but they seemed to have little concern over his destructive lifestyle until he started having regular trips to the ER. Even then, he seemed to be nothing more than a nuisance to their every day life.

"Maybe you guys need to get him some help..."I suggested quietly. He just shook his head and, in a moment of frustration, slammed his fists against his legs.

"We've fucking tried, Taylor! We've tried therapists, psychiatrists, everything! We've even tried hypnotists! Nothing is fucking working, and I don't know what there is left to try..."He said in a helpless frustration.

"Well, maybe he just needs someone to talk to. Someone who understands him..."I said, feeling helpless in solving this on-going struggle. Instantly, his eyes lit up with hope.

"That's it...We need to find him someone, and maybe... Just maybe... If he falls for someone, he'll feel like turning his life around..."His hopefulness disintegrated as quick as it had appeared. "Oh, who am I kidding? No one's going to go for a bat shit crazy, drug addicted, psychotic loner..."

"Well, maybe we can find someone..."I offered as a bit of hope, though there wasn't much of it. Suddenly, he locked eyes with me.

"Yeah... Someone who's understanding and a really, really good friend and who can be trusted and relied on..."He added. My eyes widened and I shook my head furiously.

"No... No way, Mikey... I am not getting involved with your brother... We are seniors, for God's sake. I just want to get through this year, no strings attached," I rambled. He just looked at me with those big, pitiful brown eyes.

"Please... Just try... If he doesn't get any better in a couple months, then I guess there's just no hope... But, I'm begging you... Please, Taylor... Save my brother... The only hope for him is you... Please..."The tears welled up in his eyes, and I felt my conscience giving in.

"Alright, fine. Just a couple months though... Till like Christmas, but no later..."I added quickly. He smiled and embraced me in one of the tightest hugs he could manage.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" He cried. I sighed and laughed softly on the outside. In my mind, there were a million different thoughts. I don't even know this guy. What if he doesn't like me? What if we don't get along? What in the hell did I just agree to?