Caught in the Middle

After a week of handing out references and many job rejections, I finally managed to pick up a few hours a week at the quiet little record store tucked away in the corner of town. It was barely a job though, as most of the people who came through were there to visit me.

"Y'know, all you have to do is ask Tim and he woulda given you a job at 8123," Kennedy mused as he lazily looked through the new-in-stock vinyls.

"What makes you think that Tim Kirch would give me a job?" I scoffed, "With the amount of times I rejected him in high school, not mention I have no idea what to do in whatever it is he does anyway."

"Well, you wouldn't be on tour with us, you'd probably just be helping out with packing merch orders in the warehouse. Once the album is done they'll be pretty busy in there with orders, it's not a bad place to start."

I thought about what Kennedy was saying. I could always use the extra money and I'd get to see my friends.

"I'll talk to him about it soon. Now if you'll excuse me, I have work to get back to."

This time Kennedy scoffed. "Yeah right, Jessy, the only people that come in here are Garrett, John and I, and it's always to see you. You'll wear a hole in the carpet if you keep vacuuming it."

Kennedy was right. This was barely even a job, it was basically shop-sitting. I'd need to find something that could keep me busy and not want to shoot myself.

"So what plans do we have for the weekend? I forgot how boring it was to live here when you didn't have school," I joked.

"Well, we're playing a one-off show on Saturday night and then we're all going back to Halvo's afterwards for some drinks and stuff." I had no idea who Halvo was, but I nodded along anyway. "You should come out to the show and we'll take you to Halvo's afterwards."

I screwed up my nose at the thought. "I don't really like the idea of standing in the middle of a crowd of girls, getting all sweaty and hearing them chant out how much they want your dick." Kennedy and Garrett had told me a few stories that had happened on tours and I was officially terrified of their fans.

"You can sit up the back with Tim at the merch table. Come on, just come please? You've never seen us play," Kennedy practically begged. This was true, I was kind of excited to see how far they'd come since they would practice in Pat's basement and it was a great excuse to get out of the house.

"Fine, I'll come. What time and where?"

"7pm, down at the theatre across from the tacky church. You remember that tacky church, right?" Kennedy said with a smirk on his face. Of course I remembered that tacky church. We'd sat out the back of it one night and got so high that we thought we could hear the police coming to arrest us.

"Alright, I'll be there. Now get out of here before I have actual paying customers come in." Kennedy scoffed again and left the store with a friendly goodbye, leaving me to the silence of the store.

* * * * *

I spent all of Saturday contemplating what to wear. I thought that jeans and a top would be too casual for the party afterwards, but a dress would be too fancy for the concert. I settled on a bandage skirt with a plain black singlet and my sandals, feeling like the outfit could be suitable for both places.

When I got to the venue, there was a line of girls all wearing shorts and t-shirts, immediately making me feel overdressed for the event. I wasn't entirely sure where to go, until I heard a voice call out my name. I turned towards the voice to see Tim Kirch himself standing by the door waving me over.

"Kennedy told me you were coming and said to keep an eye out for you so you could get in before the show started," he said as he opened the doors to let me in. There was an echo of guitars as the opening band were sound-checking and the boys were hanging around the merch table; John nursing a bottle of beer.

"Hey, you made it," Kennedy said with a smile as he saw me walking towards them. Garrett's eyes widened slightly and he mumbled something about calling his mom before walking off.

"Yeah I did. Never thought this would happen, ever," I joked and they all chuckled with me.

"Well, over the last six or so years we played in Chicago at least twice a year, you've had plenty of opportunities," Kennedy joked. John looked at me intently, noticing when I stiffened at the mention of Chicago, but I played it off.

"Well it's not like you told me you were there, or else I would have come," I said.

"Touché," Kennedy said with a wink. The band on stage had finished sound checking and it was nearly time for the doors to open.

"Alright guys, get backstage. I'm opening doors in five minutes," Tim said, shooing them off to a side door. They all disappeared through the door, gathering around Garrett who had now turned a ghastly shade of pale.

"What's up with Garrett?" I asked Tim as I sat at the second seat behind the merch desk.

"I dunno, he's never been this nervous before. It's probably because he has a pretty girl watching him play tonight," Tim said with a sleazy grin on his face. I rolled my eyes.

"You haven't changed a bit, have you?" I said dryly. He shook his head and shot me a smirk as he moved towards the doors, placing his hands on the handles.

"Be prepared for a flock of pubescent girls to come barrelling towards the table, you can give me a hand until the show starts." He opened the doors and rushed back towards the merch table as a steady stream of girls began to pour through, half heading towards the stage barricade and the other half lining up to purchase one of the several t-shirt designs pinned to the board behind my seat.

For the next half hour I was busy finding t-shirts and selling them, not even thinking about the show that was going to take place or the fact that these girls idolised my best friends, until one girl spoke up.

"Hey, are you Jessy?"

I looked at the girl in confusion, looking over at Tim to see if he had an answer to this, but he was busy selling a stack of shirts to a fan.

"Uh, yeah, I-I am. Sorry, but, how do you know me?" I stammered, taken back.

"Kennedy posted a picture of you on his Instagram the other day, see?" She tapped on her phone screen a few times and then showed me a picture on her phone. It was of me sitting behind the register at the record store, staring blankly at the phone in my hand, with the caption "Jessy working hard".

"How did you even recognise me from that photo? You can barely see my face," I frowned.

"I kinda just put two and two together, I mean, like, you're in Arizona at The Maine's show helping out, and you kinda look like that photo," she stumbled over her words, as to not make herself seem like a creepy stalker. I nodded, still processing this information, taking her order for a shirt and watching her as she walked away after it was sold. Being friends with a band was about to get a lot different than I thought it would be.

I handed over a shirt to the last of the line as the opening band began their first song, collapsing on my seat and stretching out my arms.

"How the hell do you do this Tim?" I asked him.

"It's not usually that crazy in other states, I can usually manage it by myself-"

"Not that, I mean everyone knowing about you. You're not even in the band but everyone knows you because you work for them and you're Pat's brother. Doesn't that get a little weird sometimes?" I asked.

Tim looked at me warily. "Why, did someone say something to you about me?"

I shook my head. "Some girl recognised me from one of Kennedy's Instagram posts and it just kinda took me by surprise."

Tim shrugged his shoulders. "You get used to it. Just be glad that a lot of their fans aren't as crazy as other bands' fans. The boys went on tour with All Time Low once and their tour bus nearly got mobbed. I don't know how their crew handles it like they do, if I was Matt Flyzik I'd probably shoot myself in the head. Bunch of animals," he muttered at the end, shaking his head.

I dropped the question, thinking it over in my head as the opening band played their set and another band took the stage, the crowd going wilder than it did for the opening band. An hour later, the crowd was chattering excitedly, anticipating my best friends' band. Pat appeared from the side of the stage and a roar erupted from the crowd, making me flinch.

Tim laughed at my shocked expression. "You think that's bad, wait until John comes out."

Surely enough, as each boy walked on the stage with guitars strapped across their bodies, the screams got louder, until John stepped out and the crowd was deafening. Tim just kept laughing at me as I eventually covered my ears.

"Good evening, Phoenix Arizona, you beautiful, beautiful people. How are you?" John slurred into the microphone, causing the crowd to erupt into another bout of cheers.

"Is he drunk?" I yelled over the crowd to Tim, who smirked and nodded.

"Every show, doesn't miss a beat. When they first started playing shows, he was so nervous he'd down half a bottle of Jack and play almost the entire show facing Pat's drum kit. Soon he got so good at playing shows while drunk that it just seemed normal," Tim yelled back as John introduced the song and the band started playing. My eyes widened slightly as I thought back to their old practices where Kennedy would constantly mess up notes and Pat's drum playing just sounded like he was banging on any random drum. Now it was all in time and they formed songs that the crowd was going crazy for, I could only just make out John's voice above the voices of singing 16 year olds.

They played a range of songs, taking a small break when John picked up an acoustic guitar.

"This next song comes from our first full-length record," he said into the microphone, sounding more sober, "And it's about not letting go of that person you love and doing everything you can to keep them with you. It's called Into Your Arms." The audience screamed as he began strumming the guitar and Pat joined him on the drums. I looked over at Tim, who was frowning.

"What's wrong?" I shouted over the music.

"Something's up with Garrett. He's acting really weird tonight, he's not usually like this." I looked up to the stage to see Garrett standing practically motionless while playing bass, not looking up at the crowd.

"Is he usually different to this?" I asked. Tim nodded vigorously.

"He's usually bouncing all over the stage and jumping around but he's stood in nearly that same position the entire night. I'll quiz him when the shows over."

We stopped talking and I took a moment to listen to the lyrics the crowd was chanting back at the band.

"I'm falling in love, but it's falling apart, I need to find my way back to the start. When we were in love, oh things were better than they are, let me back into, into your arms," John crooned and my heart skipped a beat. It was undeniable, I was still in love with John after all these years and I wondered if he ever felt the same way about me after I left.

The show went on for another twenty minutes and just before it finished, Tim prepared me behind the merch table again.

"All of those girls that went straight for the barricade when they came in will be flocking up here, and if they get pissed that their size is sold out just tell them that it's too bad and they should have gotten it before the show started," Tim prepped me. There was a final crash of drums and John said a thank you to the final cheers of the audience before they left the stage and the house lights came on.

Like Tim said, all the girls that had been rushing for the barricade earlier were now standing in line to buy merch, but thankfully we didn't run out of any sizes until the very end.

Once the last fan had left the venue, Tim closed the doors and began taking down the merch that was pinned up and packing the leftovers into the boxes they came in.

"You can leave if you want, this won't take long and I'm sure your fans would love to see you," Tim joked. I rolled my eyes and flipped him the bird, picking up my bag and slinging it over my shoulder.

"Are you sure?" He nodded.

"All I need to do is count the till and make sure it all adds up then I'll just take this back out to my car and wait for the boys to be done with their signing," he explained, "Thanks for your help though, I appreciate it. Here." He tossed me a ball of black material and I unfolded it to find one of the more modest designs we had been selling tonight. I didn't want to admit that it was actually a pretty cool design and I'd been planning on seeing if Kennedy had one I could steal, but this was slightly better. I thanked Tim and stepped out of the venue to find a few dozen girls forming circles around each of my friends.

I located Kennedy and waited in the circle of girls, a couple of them eyeing me off. He was perfectly polite to them all, greeting them all warmly, signing whatever it was they held in their hands and taking photos with them. He turned to me with the same big smile on his face, but it quickly dropped when he saw me standing there and he rolled his eyes.

"What do you want?"

I scoffed, playing along with his sarcasm. "What a nice way to treat your friends Kennedy, I'm not gonna let you in the record store from now on."

"Well damn, there goes my plans for the rest of my week," he rolled his eyes, letting a smile sneak onto his face. "You going to Halvo's?"

"Yeah, I don't know how to get there though, I can drive you back to your place so you can drop off your gear then you can show me?"

"Pat's taking all our gear back to the studio once Tim is done so we can go straight there when I'm finished up here."

I nodded. "Okay sweet, I'm parked in the car park so when you're done come and find me."

"Alright, I'll see you soon Jessy."

I turned and began walking away, hearing a couple of girls whispering about me and if I was Kennedy's girlfriend. I felt a tap on my shoulder and I turned to find one of them behind me.

"Uh, hi?" said awkwardly.

"I don't wanna seem rude, but I'm curious about if you're dating Kennedy," she said awkwardly. Her friends were all looking back at her, so it was obvious that she was offered as a sacrifice to ask me the question.

"Uh, no I'm not. He's just a friend, I don't think I'd ever date him, sorry to crush your dreams or whatever."

"Well, we think you'd make a really cute couple anyway. Sorry for bothering you." She turned and walked back to her friends who all watched as she shook her head in disappointment. I could hear them chattering about it as they approached John, and for a moment I wished I could be a fly on the wall to hear what he would say in return if they asked him about it. Instead, I turned and walked towards my car, knowing he'd have something to say to me about it later. A pit of dread began to grow in my stomach and what was supposed to be a fun night out had the possibility to become a disaster.