A Drop in the Ocean

I sat in Jake’s lap for a few minutes, listening to the sounds of the footsteps walking away in the distance. I listened to the crackling of the bonfire and the way the ocean lapped against the sand on the beach. “It’s so peaceful,” I whispered and relaxed my body in Jake’s arms. “Most peaceful night I’ve had in a long time,” Jake said and tightened his arms around me. I blushed when he did so.

“We’re finally alone again,” Jake mumbled and I turned my head from looking out at the ocean to gaze at him once more. Those beautiful brown eyes were my favorite thing to look into and I almost hated myself that it had taken me this long to realize it. I brought my hand up and cupped his cheek, letting my thumb rub over his prominent cheek bone.

“Renesmee,” he said my name in that perfect voice of his; I could have sworn I felt my whole body shake when my heart did its pitter-patter thing again. “Tonight truly has been perfect…” he stated and I nodded my head immediately. How could I not agree with that? “I never thought going on a date with you would be this perfect… a movie, a beach bonfire… They’re things we would have done on a non-date but… tonight they’re so much more special.”

“This is the best night of my life, Ness. I’ve spent a lot of nights with you since you were born and I spent a lot of time, nights and days with Bella before then… I’ve got a lot of best days and best nights…but this tops the list.” Jake admitted and I blushed, still stroking his cheek with my thumb. “It’s definitely the best night of my life, too. Although mine has been considerably shorter than yours…” I teased a bit and he nodded, that smile upon his lips.

“Second date isn’t out of the question, is it, then?” Jake questioned and I shook my head no, leaning my head in a little more to let my forehead press against his. “I hope that we can go on a date every night from here on out.” “You mean it,” he asked, sounding a little surprised and I gave a soft giggle.

“Of course I mean it. I wasn’t kidding when I said this has been the best night of my life. I want a repeat… like every night. I would be content sitting with you on this beach by a bonfire every night for the rest of my life. As long as there’s s’mores,” I was afraid then, that perhaps I’d sounded a bit clingy, so I added the small joke at the end and bit down on my bottom lip, I was slightly relieved when Jake started to laugh a bit.

“You projected your thoughts,” he commented and I sighed; there went that feeling of relief. Man I hated doing that especially when I least wanted to, it was borderline embarrassing. I’m really going to have to get a grip on that power…

“You aren’t being clingy at all. If I was some human guy, a new boyfriend of yours then yeah, maybe it would be a tad bit off-putting… but I’m the definition of clingy. I’ve got a wolfy claim on you that no one except a few members of my tribe can understand. I’m not even sure that you fully grasp it yet,” Jake commented.

“It’s a relief to know that I’m not being clingy in your eyes but… you’re killing me with this imprinting stuff. I wish I was imprinted on you…” I mumbled and he grinned which naturally melted my heart all over again. “With time, if you really fall in love with me… I promise you, you’ll feel like you’ve imprinted.”

“I hope that’s a promise you keep,” I mumbled and let my eyes slip shut, just breathing in his scent that seemed to dance wonderfully underneath my nose. I was glad that Jake didn’t have that wolfy-odor to my nose that he seemed to have with the rest of the family. It really was like I was human and not a vampire other than the fact that I could smell everything, hear everything, see it all, and run really fast… I was like superwoman.

“You know, earlier tonight when I was in the house with Emily… I admitted to her that… I loved you. She agreed with that, and she thinks I’ve loved you for a lot longer than I even realized. I think that’s what it’s like to be with someone who’s imprinted on you. You start off loving them like a big brother and a protector…they’re your hero. Then it develops into a friendship, a companionship, I loved you like a best friend for so long. Now it’s something even stronger…it’s an intimate love. Until now, I used to get excited to see you and have my best friend to talk to but now it’s like… my heart slightly aches when you leave… because no measure of time is enough for us to be together,” I mumbled, my voice beginning to trail off. I hadn’t meant to ramble on like that but I was sure he’d understand or at least I hoped he would.

“Now you know what it’s like to imprint,” Jake whispered and I couldn’t stop myself from blushing. “Do I, really?” I asked and he nodded his head. “What you said… I couldn’t have said it better. That’s exactly how I feel, it’s like… you were in my head.” “Maybe I was,” I admitted quietly, “but I feel everything that I put into words…even if they were yours from your mind. I can’t control when I do that… I wish I could…”

“I’m personally glad you can’t… I like when you show me things you don’t want me to know,” Jake said with a small smirk. I slowly stood up from his lap and gazed down at him. “Of course you do.” I teased and he looked up at me with questions in his eyes. I think I had the same questions in my own eyes. “Where do we go from here, Jake?” I asked him quietly and bit on my lower lip. “I’m…I’ve never had a boyfriend, I’ve never been in love… I don’t know what I should do.”

“Ness, it’s instinctual. You running your fingers through my hair a moment ago, the way you caressed my cheek… those are things a girlfriend does, and it lets me know how you feel… you’re doing a fine job of showing me,” Jake said as he stood up and looked down at me. I blushed and reached up, wrapping my arms up around his neck.

I soon felt Jake’s arms wrap around my waist which made me smile like nothing else. “I like being like this with you,” I whispered, “me too,” he agreed and held me even tighter.

“Believe it or not, Ness, you’re the only girl I’ve ever been this way with. I waited so long for your Mom because I thought I was so fucking in love with her and I was but not the way I am with you… then all the drama of the last several years unfolded and it didn’t leave time for dating. Other couples who were already together: they made it through. But as you can see, Leah and I, Seth, those of who didn’t already have girlfriends or boyfriends, we never had the time to find ‘em. Then I imprinted on you and didn’t want to find anybody else after that… So I’ve waited, I’ve waited for five years to be like this with somebody.”

I could tell to a certain degree that it pained Jake to say those words, it had pained Jake to wait for me even though it made me that much more head over heels for him to know he had waited all this time….to know that I was worth waiting for even if it was only because of the wolfy claim.

“I promised you, no more waiting, Jacob,” I whispered and played the short hair on the back of his hair, lightly giving it a tug. “I can’t believe that…I’m your first girlfriend,” I blushed at the prospect of it and Jake chuckled. “I sound so pathetic when you word it like that. I should have plenty of experience in dating compared to you…and yet here we are. Both as inexperienced as the other it would seem.”

“Maybe that’ll make it all the better, more genuine feeling,” I admitted and Jake grinned some, I could tell he was agreeing with me. I felt Jake’s warm hands rub over my lower back which made me coo, arching my back so that my chest pressed more so against his. “Your hands are so warm,” I mumbled somewhat breathlessly.

I felt Jake lift the halter top I was wearing only a small bit so his hands could slip beneath it. I felt those strong, warm hands of his rub over my bare back and I completely turned to jelly in his arms it felt like. I clung to him and blushed heavily. “That feels so good,” I whimpered and nuzzled my head into his neck, breathing in his scent once more. It was so euphoric, intoxicating in the most wonderful of ways.

“I’m glad you’re human temperature, Ness… but your skin is still as smooth as porcelain,” Jake murmured into my ear. There he was, doing that again, letting his hot breath hit my ear lobe. “Dammit, Jake,” I whimpered and let my lips graze across his neck. That’s when I really made him react.

Jake dug his nails into my lower back while breathing out a shaky moan. I let out a small groan of satisfaction as well. “Damn, I like that,” I mumbled against his neck, letting my lips stay there like a soft kiss… he kept digging his nails into my lower back, causing me to almost squirm in his grasp. I had no idea what this feeling was that was bubbling up inside of me but I liked it…no, I loved it. I think these were those things called: hormones.

I knew without a shadow of a doubt that if my parents were here right now, they’d separate Jake and me. The language I’d just used and the thoughts that were going on within my head that my Father would be able to ready very easily. A sliver of me felt as if this was too much too fast but I was doing as Jake suggested—do what felt natural, instinctual even.

I pulled my head back just a little to again gaze up into his chocolate brown eyes. “Are we allowed to…?” I didn’t have to finish because Jake beat me to the word I was about to use. “Kiss,” he whispered the word and I nodded my head very slowly. My lips were slightly parted because I’d just been gnawing at my lower lip out of nervousness.