Finding My Way Home

After the initial shock of being ripped through the hotel door, my gaze sets on her. She is wearing simple boot cut jeans, black converse, and a white t-shirt. She is absolutely beautiful, and its nice to see her wearing something that looks like her for a change. I have millions of questions racing through my mind, but all I want to do is touch her. I walk towards her and attempt to hug her, but she takes a step back avoiding me. I'm in complete shock, she's never backed away from me before, it's an entirely new kind of pain. She crosses her hands over her midsection and looks up and meets my eyes for the first time.

"Sid, please..." she practically begs me not to touch her.

"What Cassie?" I ask her, I throw Cassie in there to hurt her. I shouldn't want to hurt her, but I want her to feel the pain I'm going through.

"Just don't..."

"Don't what Cassie?" I ask taking a step closer to her.

"Stop." she warns but doesn't move back.

"Stop what Cassie?" I ask.

"Stop! Don't call me that!" she screams tears building in her eyes.

"It's your name isn't it? Or is that a lie too?" I ask. I know I'm being horrible, but all I feel is resentment and hate towards her right now.

"Stop... Why?" She asks with her lip quivering.

"Why... I don't know what you mean?" I ask her honestly.

"Why do you hate me so much?" she practically screams. I laugh, I can't help it. Why would I hate her, is she honestly that clueless?

"You left me! I thought you were dead! I stopped living, and you have the nerve to ask me why it's possible I hate you? Honestly Cass? I'm angry and hurt, but I could never hate you." I yell and she flinches.

"You... You just don't understand!" she yells back.

"What is it Cass? Make me understand!" I am dying to know what happened to her, why she would leave everything behind.

"It's not that easy Sid!"

"What is honestly so bad you can't tell me?" I ask with my anger bubbling, I'm her best friend- was her best friend- and she has the nerve to say she can't just explain.

"If I told you it would make you want to help, and I can't have that." she replies softer dropping her gaze to her shoes.

"Why can't I help?" I ask feeling like I'm making some progress.

"It wouldn't be safe." she whispers.

"Cass, you have to tell me what happened so I can understand what the problem is." I try to coax her.

"If I tell you, you can't judge me, and don't interrupt until I finish." she meets my gaze again.

"Okay I promise, but it can't be that bad Cass."

"You haven't heard the story Sid."

"Then make me understand." I reply and she motions for the chairs in the corner of the room. The two armchairs are spaced far enough apart we won't have to touch. She sits in the one to the left so I take the one across from it, an end table between the two. She pulls her feet up into the chair and tucks them underneath herself. After a deep breath, and running her fingers through her hair she looks at me ready to begin the story.

"As you know my father is Gregore Jacobs, one of the most powerful men in New York. He practically runs the city, everyone is wrapped around his finger. My mother, Elenore Pechiro, married to him fresh out of France, and didn't know any better. She fell for his charm not realizing how dangerous her really was. Cross him, and you're not always found the next day. The most important thing to my father is blood, it always has been. My mother was tired of his antics, and the stronghold he had on the city. I was born while he was visiting a contact in Minnesota, my old hometown, she decided to do something about it. She paid off a nurse to swap me and another baby. She wouldn't let him have his precious blood line continue. When the daughter he was raising grew ill and needed a blood transplant my mother knew it wouldn't be long until what she did was discovered. When my father discovered what happened he was furious. Two days later my mother was found dead in a car wreck, they blamed engine malfunction. My father then came to get me. He took me from Minnesota and had his contact in Minnesota persuade the police department I was dead, and my body would never be discovered. I fought him Sid, don't think I didn't. I loved you and I knew that this was the end of my life. The daughter that was taking my place vanished, and I still don't know where she went. I was given the name Elizabeth Jacobs and shipped off to Paris until I turned twenty. While I was in Paris I was educated in music, art, food, culture... anything you could imagine. I fought, but they threatened the Laurents as well as you and your family. They wouldn't let me leave the chateaux, I was indoors for two years straight. Finally, I broke and was allowed to come back to the states. I became Elizabeth Jacobs and never looked back. It was too hard thinking about everything I left behind. He dyed my hair black and convinced me to drop weight and I barely recognized myself, I'm surprised you did. I became the New York socialite daughter, but remained out of the spotlight. People know who I am, but I've never found a picture of myself online. Even the death report and missing persons report for Cassandra Laurent are gone. About a year and a half ago my father set his sights on Yale graduate Mathew Anderson. He hired him on at the firm and threw us together every chance he could. Eventually we began dating, probably due to the fact my father dangling the firm in his face if we got married. Then I learned of my father's remarriage and well you know the rest..." she finishes and I feel sick. I can't even comprehend what's going on, how is any of this possible?

"I..."

"I know its a lot Sid, but its what happened. I wish I would have grown up in Minnesota and we would have had a relationship and I wasn't ripped from you. Life isn't fair, I've learned this, but you have to accept this."

"Cassie...how.. I can't..."

"That's not my name Sid."

"Yes it is Cass, don't be ridiculous."

"Please just stop! Cassandra Laurent died back in Minnesota, she's buried there and will never come back; despite how much you or I would like. My name is Elizabeth Jacobs, I need you to accept that." she sobs out.

"I'm sorry.... I just..."

"I know Sid, but please..."

"Let me help you, please!" I ask and try to touch her but she flinches away.

"This is why I didn't want to tell you! I knew you'd do this!" she yells at me.

"Tell me what I'm supposed to do! I can't leave you there, let you go back to New York like nothing's happened! I love you Elizabeth, why can't you understand that?" I plead.

"You forget you ever knew Cassandra Laurent, and you try to accept the time you have with me now."

"What does that even mean, accept the time you have with me now?"

"Once the wedding is over we can't stay in contact..." she trails off ashamed.

"I just found you, I can't loose you again!" I scream a leap off the chair and begin to pace around the room.

"It can't happen!"

"Why, just tell me why you'd never want to talk to me again!"

"It's not me Sid! My father and Mathew would never allow it. My father let me come here to explain everything, and insure we wouldn't have a problem remaining detached to one another. If Mathew found out he'd... he'd..." she intentionally doesn't finish that sentence.

"He'd what Elizabeth?" I ask my anger boiling at the possibilities.

"Nothing..." she whispers not daring to meet my eyes.

"Has he ever hit you?" I ask furious. She flinches at my question but doesn't say anything right away, and I have my answer. How could any man even contemplate raising a hand at a woman like that.

"Of course not Sid, don't be stupid." she replies shaky, and I don't believe it for a second.

"I refuse to let you go back to him! Can't you see how wrong that is?"

"What should I do?"

"Run, please don't stay with him, please!" I beg furiously coming closer to her still stationary in the chair, and she doesn't move away.

"Running would only make things worse." she says defeated.

"How could it be worse?"

"No matter where I go, he'd never let me leave. My father wouldn't give up until I was found and back in his grasp." she replies tears streaming down her cheeks. I want so badly to touch her but I'm too afraid.

"Why did you have to wait until I was in New Jersey to tell me this?" I ask her.

"He monitors my phone calls, emails, texts, where I am at every minute of the day; both of them do. I'm followed wherever I go, we can't be seen or in any sort of contact when I'm back in Pittsburgh." she says and I'm completely speechless.

"Does Mathew now about this?"

"No. Please Sid, tell me you'll trust me and try to listen to me." she pleads standing up.

"I don't want to lose you." I say truthfully. She throws her arms around me and hugs me tightly burying her face in my chest. I am stunned, but wrap my arms around her. It feels so amazing to actually be touching her again. I hold onto her as if my life depends on it. I kiss the top of her head and take her in.

"That's all I needed to hear. I swear I'll talk to you soon Sid. I have to go now, I'm heading back to Pittsburgh tonight. Please Sid." she mumbles into my chest. I squeeze her again, and she takes a deep breath then pulls away despite me trying to pull her closer. I look down into her teary eyes, a smile on her face.

"I love you Elizabeth, you know that right?"

"I know Sid, I'll see you soon." she replies, picking up her bag from the floor and stops at the door. She puts her hand on the doorknob and takes a deep breath before twisting the nob and walking out of the door.