Take the Wind Out of You

I began to notice the changes occurring in her due to the pregnancy. Yet, some were a little more, well, odd . I don’t want to sound sexist and say she was going through mood swings, but I had a feeling there was something wrong. Mentally wrong. It’s been two months now. Although the team and I have been doing great so far in the season-which made me relax a little more- whenever I try to spend time with her, she seems distant. I wanted to confront her about it, but something just tells me to wait it out, that things will fall into place and maybe it’s just a phase or something.

Her baby bump has become a little more noticeable when I rub my hand over it. It sends shivers down my spine, but deep down I’m ecstatic to become a father. I can’t help but question whether it’ll be a boy or a girl? Will she or he grow up to love hockey- or any other sport would be fine. Will they have her gorgeous eyes? I couldn’t wait to hold them in my arms. I couldn’t wait to see her become motherly like she was with little Rosie.

Little Rosie.

After a sudden attack, she needed a surgery… she didn’t make it… I was crushed. My lover on the other hand, devastated. Although she tried to keep Rosie breathing by using CPR, by the time they got her to the doctor it was too late. Maybe that’s what has her so beat down; since we were close to one year that Rosie passed away. I reminisced the last words we exchanged. She was really smart for a 10 year old.

Flashback

“I can tell you like her, a lot Jon”, she giggled as she caught me staring at her. We had already been on six dates. She’s seen some of the games. Today I was going to ask her out- to be my girlfriend. I had a stupid grin on my face just knowing this beautiful angel was soon all mine completely.

“Do you think she’ll say yes?”

“Do I ever!” I blushed a little. She waved at me, smiling then presumed to helping the kids put the toys away and prepare for lunch time. She even made cupcakes for each one of them. It was crazy- she had finals and still managed to go as far for them? I loved her for that thought. “Jon, take care of her” Rosie added as she swung her legs on the bench, looking down. I nodded, raising my pinky to promise I would forever. “I only say this because I see her like the mom I never had. You like the dad. I love my grandparents… but you know-“I pulled her into my arms, brushing her hair softly.

“It’s ok”, I whispered as she began to sniffle. Suddenly we felt another pair of warm arms wrap around us.

“I love you both,” she said sweetly, unaware of what happened but intruding in the perfect moment. The moment Rosie needed the most. She passed away a few days later.

End of flashback

“I’ll cook tonight,” I said, taking the pan out of her hands. She looked up at me, her eyes a little saddened. I put it on the table than put my hands on her shoulders, bending over a bit so we were eye to eye. “Go rest. You have your interview tomorrow” I said softly and kissed her on the forehead. As she turned around I slapped her ass, she squeaked. I chuckled, pouncing on her, “I love you”.

“I… I love you too” she breathed and continued making her way to the living room. I rummaged through the fridge looking for what I could make with what ingredients we had. Boy, we should go grocery shopping I thought as I managed to find ingredients for beef stroganoff. After putting the pasta to boil and simmering the meat I walked over to the living room to check on my sweetie. She lay horizontally on the couch and from what the screen showed she was on Pinterest looking at dessert recipes. I walked over and sat on the floor, facing her. I studied her face. She looked younger than usual due to the release of all the stress she had restrained.

“Foods about ready,” I said, poking her cheek. She looked over at me, smiling.

“Ohhh, what did you make?” she giggled as she rolled over, rubbing her belly. “I am huw-ungwy” she cried. I picked her up and carried her to the kitchen, placing her in the nook. I served her a plate and some cranberry juice then for myself. After sitting down I realized she already began to eat. I smiled until she looked up at me, embarrassed. “Jon!”

“I love that you have an appetite nowadays,” I chuckled as I began to eat. Her cheeks turned pink but she continued to stuff her face.

“I will eat like a man tonight!” After dinner she helped me clean the dishes and we decided to watch a movie on Neflix. Deciding on The Fox and the Hound, we snuggled under a blanket that just came out the dryer. She caressed my hair, making me completely relax, almost causing me to fall asleep until she spoke up. “Jon?”

“Hmmm?” I mumbled, looking up at her with a tired expression.

“Do you… think it’ll be a boy or a girl?” she asked me. I pondered for a bit. If I remember right, when it protrudes out more it’s a boy? I thought as I ran my hand over her belly. It was still a tad early to know.

“I have a feeling it’ll be a girl”.

“Me too” she nodded slowly. I sat up, seeing that she was holding back tears. I held her, her head burying itself into my chest.

“Let it out babe” I said gently, feeling myself about to cry a little as well. She grasped my hand, as if trying to comfort me as well. I felt her ring hit against in between my fingers. Did I even tell her? I thought to myself as she began to settle down. I wiped her eyes. “Do you know whose ring that was? Who told me that that ring was perfect for you?” I asked, observing how well she kept it after receiving it. She shrugs her shoulders, pouting slightly. Warming my heart with the kid innocence she appeared to possess in moments like these. Is it bad that I already have her engagement ring?

“My grandmother told me that my grandfather gave her that same ring 53 years ago. She was so happy since she knew he didn’t have much,” I clenched her hand in mine, smiling softly and not meeting her gaze.