Status: Not completed
Teenage Dirtbag
I shouldn't be trusted to live and let go
Haley’s POV
After our last period, Alex and I drove up to Tay’s apartment. I had rode to school with Alex, so I didn’t have my bike with me, and Tay’s apartment was too far away to walk there. I figured it wouldn’t be a good idea to let Jack drive me there as it might make Tay think he made me go talk to her. Alex had offered to come with me and although I thought Tay would be more willing to talk to just me, it was still nice to have him with me.
Things were going pretty well between Alex and me. I spent a lot of time at his house as I didn’t really want Alex coming over to my house where my father would probably be passed out on the couch. Thankfully, Alex understood why I didn’t want him coming over at my place so he would always invite me, and even Rachel, over. It was nice to not always have to cook ourselves, but instead just have Alex’s mother cook for Rachel and me. So far I didn’t regret my decision to give Alex a chance.
Alex pulled onto the driveway of We Are The In Crowd and we both got out. He took my hand and led me to the front door, ringing the doorbell. A few seconds later Jordan appeared in the doorway, towering over Alex and me.
“Hey” he simply said.
“Hey, we’re here to check on Tay” Alex explained.
“I’m guessing Jack told you what happened?” he groaned.
I nodded and Jordan sighed.
“Fine, come in, but if she doesn’t want to talk to you, you’re gonna have to leave” he said.
Alex and I nodded in agreement and followed Jordan to what I assumed was Tay’s bedroom. Had she been in her bedroom all day? Was she feeling that bad? On our way over there we were greeted by Cameron who was sitting on one of the couches in the living room, seemingly waiting for Jordan to continue the game they had been playing.
“Tay?” Jordan said, waiting outside her room.
Tay didn’t reply.
“You have visitors” he continued.
“If it’s Jack, you can tell him to leave” we heard Tay say after a moment of silence.
“If it had been Jack, he would not be standing here” Jordan replied harshly.
I told myself to tell Jack to make sure he didn’t run into any of Tay’s band mates anytime soon.
“Then who is it?” Tay asked.
“Alex and Haley” Jordan replied.
There was another awkward silence.
“Did Jack send them?” Tay asked, sounding annoyed.
Jordan turned to look at us, his eyebrows furrowed, giving us a quizzical look.
“No” I replied. “He didn’t”.
“Fine, they can come in” Tay said finally.
Jordan gestured for us to go in and he turned around to go back to the living room. Alex and I entered the room, which was completely dark. After letting my eyes get used to the dark, I could distinguish the silhouette of her bed, with Tay lying on top of it, curled into a ball. We stood in the doorway for a while as I couldn’t see enough to safely walk over to her bed.
“You can turn on the lights” Tay muttered, while I saw her silhouette sit up straight.
Alex had found the switch pretty quickly and turned the lights on. I walked up to the bed and sat down on the edge next to Tay while Alex closed the door.
“I would apologize for not looking presentable, but I figure you’re here because Jack told you what happened” Tay said, while playing with her hair.
I nodded. “Yeah he did” I answered. “How are you?”
Tay looked up at me and sighed. “I don’t know… I mean, I feel like shit, but that might also have something to do with the fact I didn’t sleep at all last night.”
“I’m sorry” I said softly.
I turned to look at Alex, who was standing awkwardly in the corner.
“Are you just gonna stand there?” I asked.
“Yeah, you know, I’m not really good at this” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.
“You can just go play a game with the guys if you prefer to do that” Tay suggested.
“What? No, I came here to check up on you” Alex said quickly.
Tay tilted her head. “And you did, so thank you. You don’t have to be here if it makes you uncomfortable.”
Alex doubted for a moment, probably thinking he was a bad friend if he would go play a game with Cameron and Jordan. He looked at me, quizzically.
“Go” I said smiling lightly.
Alex seemed relieved as he left Tay’s room to go to the living room. Alex wasn’t very fond of deep emotional conversation, unless they were with me, and me alone.
“Sorry about that” I told Tay. “He offered to drive me here as I didn’t have my bike with me but these conversations are kinda out of his comfort zone.”
“Oh it’s fine, it’s nice of you to even check up on me at all” she shrugged. “I mean, you’re both closer with Jack than with me anyway.”
“Well yeah, but I’m basically closer with Jack than I am with anyone. That doesn’t mean I approve of what he did.” I explained.
I thought it was too early to already start talking Jack up. I should probably hear her side of the story first. Not that I didn’t care about her side, but I promised Jack to at least tell her how sorry he was and I couldn't let myself forget about that.
“What did he tell you anyway?” Tay asked.
“That you two had a movie night and that he kissed you when he was leaving and that you pushed him back and yelled at him.” I answered.
She sighed. “Do you think I overreacted?” she asked.
“I don’t know. I don’t know what you were feeling at that exact moment and what caused you to react like that” I said. “It must’ve been coming from somewhere right?”
“Well yeah, but I was angry and all of my frustrations I’ve kept to myself over the past few weeks just all came out at once. Though most of that frustration was caused by him, I might have been too harsh on him” she muttered.
“Well, at least you conveyed the message” I said. “And of course, I conveyed it again as he was really confused as to what had happened between you two.”
“Really? Why?” Tay asked.
“Because he’s a guy. He didn’t understand that one moment you were in love with him and then he breaks up with Aimee and then suddenly you’re not” I explained.
“But I am…” she replied with a sad face.
“I know” I said. “That’s what I told him as well. Well, I told him I was pretty sure you didn’t just fall out of love with him but that he couldn’t just go from Aimee straight to you. That he needs to deal with his feelings towards Aimee first before opening his heart to anyone else. Especially one of my friends.”
“Exactly. I’m just scared that if I were to get with him right now, I would be his rebound and we all know those don’t last” Tay agreed.
“Jack didn’t. I had to explain to him what a rebound was” I said. “He really didn’t mean to hurt you Tay, and I think maybe, he really is starting to feel something for you. He was really down at school. I really thought he was gonna cry at some point.”
Tay sighed. “Now you’re making me feel guilty…”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to do that. You have every right to be mad at him. I care more about Jack than anyone, but if he were to kiss me out of the blue I would punch him in the face, so I really can’t blame you for yelling at him. At least you didn’t get physical. But in Jack’s defense, I just want you to know that he never meant to hurt you. He just wanted to kiss you and did so without thinking of the consequences. He really is sorry” I said.
“Well, I can’t say it didn’t feel good when he kissed me” Tay admitted. “But then I started overthinking it and I just couldn’t do it. I can’t help him get over Aimee. I won’t.”
“I know, and trust me, he now does too” I said. “He just wants to apologize to you and I’m pretty sure he’ll never dare to make a move on you again, so problem solved.”
“Well, I didn’t need that either. I just need him to get himself together and leave me be until he does” Tay shrugged.
“I assume you’ve seen all of his calls and texts?” I asked.
She nodded. “Yeah but I’m really not feeling like talking to him.”
“I can imagine, but I told him that as soon as you were ready to talk to him, you would probably come to him so he won’t be texting you anymore” I said.
Tay smiled lightly. “Thanks. Just in case I might not be at school tomorrow either, will you just tell Jack I will indeed come to him when I’m ready to talk and that I might have overreacted?”
I nodded. “Will do.”
“Thanks” she replied. “I should probably try to get some sleep if I want to go to school tomorrow.”
“Okay, well maybe I’ll see you tomorrow then?” I asked.
“Yeah maybe” she replied. “Will you turn the lights off again?”
I nodded. “Bye” I said as I opened the door and turned the lights off.
“Bye” Tay replied before I left the room.
I headed for the living room to get Alex. I heard excited screaming coming from the living room and found the three of them yelling at the television screen on which some game I didn’t know was playing. Judging by the controller in Alex’s hand I figured he was playing now, so I decided to just sit with them and wait till he was done. After about 15 minutes they were finally done playing and I convinced Alex to go home as his mother would probably have dinner ready by now. After he promised Cameron and Jordan to come over more often to play games with them we finally left.
After our last period, Alex and I drove up to Tay’s apartment. I had rode to school with Alex, so I didn’t have my bike with me, and Tay’s apartment was too far away to walk there. I figured it wouldn’t be a good idea to let Jack drive me there as it might make Tay think he made me go talk to her. Alex had offered to come with me and although I thought Tay would be more willing to talk to just me, it was still nice to have him with me.
Things were going pretty well between Alex and me. I spent a lot of time at his house as I didn’t really want Alex coming over to my house where my father would probably be passed out on the couch. Thankfully, Alex understood why I didn’t want him coming over at my place so he would always invite me, and even Rachel, over. It was nice to not always have to cook ourselves, but instead just have Alex’s mother cook for Rachel and me. So far I didn’t regret my decision to give Alex a chance.
Alex pulled onto the driveway of We Are The In Crowd and we both got out. He took my hand and led me to the front door, ringing the doorbell. A few seconds later Jordan appeared in the doorway, towering over Alex and me.
“Hey” he simply said.
“Hey, we’re here to check on Tay” Alex explained.
“I’m guessing Jack told you what happened?” he groaned.
I nodded and Jordan sighed.
“Fine, come in, but if she doesn’t want to talk to you, you’re gonna have to leave” he said.
Alex and I nodded in agreement and followed Jordan to what I assumed was Tay’s bedroom. Had she been in her bedroom all day? Was she feeling that bad? On our way over there we were greeted by Cameron who was sitting on one of the couches in the living room, seemingly waiting for Jordan to continue the game they had been playing.
“Tay?” Jordan said, waiting outside her room.
Tay didn’t reply.
“You have visitors” he continued.
“If it’s Jack, you can tell him to leave” we heard Tay say after a moment of silence.
“If it had been Jack, he would not be standing here” Jordan replied harshly.
I told myself to tell Jack to make sure he didn’t run into any of Tay’s band mates anytime soon.
“Then who is it?” Tay asked.
“Alex and Haley” Jordan replied.
There was another awkward silence.
“Did Jack send them?” Tay asked, sounding annoyed.
Jordan turned to look at us, his eyebrows furrowed, giving us a quizzical look.
“No” I replied. “He didn’t”.
“Fine, they can come in” Tay said finally.
Jordan gestured for us to go in and he turned around to go back to the living room. Alex and I entered the room, which was completely dark. After letting my eyes get used to the dark, I could distinguish the silhouette of her bed, with Tay lying on top of it, curled into a ball. We stood in the doorway for a while as I couldn’t see enough to safely walk over to her bed.
“You can turn on the lights” Tay muttered, while I saw her silhouette sit up straight.
Alex had found the switch pretty quickly and turned the lights on. I walked up to the bed and sat down on the edge next to Tay while Alex closed the door.
“I would apologize for not looking presentable, but I figure you’re here because Jack told you what happened” Tay said, while playing with her hair.
I nodded. “Yeah he did” I answered. “How are you?”
Tay looked up at me and sighed. “I don’t know… I mean, I feel like shit, but that might also have something to do with the fact I didn’t sleep at all last night.”
“I’m sorry” I said softly.
I turned to look at Alex, who was standing awkwardly in the corner.
“Are you just gonna stand there?” I asked.
“Yeah, you know, I’m not really good at this” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.
“You can just go play a game with the guys if you prefer to do that” Tay suggested.
“What? No, I came here to check up on you” Alex said quickly.
Tay tilted her head. “And you did, so thank you. You don’t have to be here if it makes you uncomfortable.”
Alex doubted for a moment, probably thinking he was a bad friend if he would go play a game with Cameron and Jordan. He looked at me, quizzically.
“Go” I said smiling lightly.
Alex seemed relieved as he left Tay’s room to go to the living room. Alex wasn’t very fond of deep emotional conversation, unless they were with me, and me alone.
“Sorry about that” I told Tay. “He offered to drive me here as I didn’t have my bike with me but these conversations are kinda out of his comfort zone.”
“Oh it’s fine, it’s nice of you to even check up on me at all” she shrugged. “I mean, you’re both closer with Jack than with me anyway.”
“Well yeah, but I’m basically closer with Jack than I am with anyone. That doesn’t mean I approve of what he did.” I explained.
I thought it was too early to already start talking Jack up. I should probably hear her side of the story first. Not that I didn’t care about her side, but I promised Jack to at least tell her how sorry he was and I couldn't let myself forget about that.
“What did he tell you anyway?” Tay asked.
“That you two had a movie night and that he kissed you when he was leaving and that you pushed him back and yelled at him.” I answered.
She sighed. “Do you think I overreacted?” she asked.
“I don’t know. I don’t know what you were feeling at that exact moment and what caused you to react like that” I said. “It must’ve been coming from somewhere right?”
“Well yeah, but I was angry and all of my frustrations I’ve kept to myself over the past few weeks just all came out at once. Though most of that frustration was caused by him, I might have been too harsh on him” she muttered.
“Well, at least you conveyed the message” I said. “And of course, I conveyed it again as he was really confused as to what had happened between you two.”
“Really? Why?” Tay asked.
“Because he’s a guy. He didn’t understand that one moment you were in love with him and then he breaks up with Aimee and then suddenly you’re not” I explained.
“But I am…” she replied with a sad face.
“I know” I said. “That’s what I told him as well. Well, I told him I was pretty sure you didn’t just fall out of love with him but that he couldn’t just go from Aimee straight to you. That he needs to deal with his feelings towards Aimee first before opening his heart to anyone else. Especially one of my friends.”
“Exactly. I’m just scared that if I were to get with him right now, I would be his rebound and we all know those don’t last” Tay agreed.
“Jack didn’t. I had to explain to him what a rebound was” I said. “He really didn’t mean to hurt you Tay, and I think maybe, he really is starting to feel something for you. He was really down at school. I really thought he was gonna cry at some point.”
Tay sighed. “Now you’re making me feel guilty…”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to do that. You have every right to be mad at him. I care more about Jack than anyone, but if he were to kiss me out of the blue I would punch him in the face, so I really can’t blame you for yelling at him. At least you didn’t get physical. But in Jack’s defense, I just want you to know that he never meant to hurt you. He just wanted to kiss you and did so without thinking of the consequences. He really is sorry” I said.
“Well, I can’t say it didn’t feel good when he kissed me” Tay admitted. “But then I started overthinking it and I just couldn’t do it. I can’t help him get over Aimee. I won’t.”
“I know, and trust me, he now does too” I said. “He just wants to apologize to you and I’m pretty sure he’ll never dare to make a move on you again, so problem solved.”
“Well, I didn’t need that either. I just need him to get himself together and leave me be until he does” Tay shrugged.
“I assume you’ve seen all of his calls and texts?” I asked.
She nodded. “Yeah but I’m really not feeling like talking to him.”
“I can imagine, but I told him that as soon as you were ready to talk to him, you would probably come to him so he won’t be texting you anymore” I said.
Tay smiled lightly. “Thanks. Just in case I might not be at school tomorrow either, will you just tell Jack I will indeed come to him when I’m ready to talk and that I might have overreacted?”
I nodded. “Will do.”
“Thanks” she replied. “I should probably try to get some sleep if I want to go to school tomorrow.”
“Okay, well maybe I’ll see you tomorrow then?” I asked.
“Yeah maybe” she replied. “Will you turn the lights off again?”
I nodded. “Bye” I said as I opened the door and turned the lights off.
“Bye” Tay replied before I left the room.
I headed for the living room to get Alex. I heard excited screaming coming from the living room and found the three of them yelling at the television screen on which some game I didn’t know was playing. Judging by the controller in Alex’s hand I figured he was playing now, so I decided to just sit with them and wait till he was done. After about 15 minutes they were finally done playing and I convinced Alex to go home as his mother would probably have dinner ready by now. After he promised Cameron and Jordan to come over more often to play games with them we finally left.