You're Already the Voice Inside My Head

I’m back lying on the bed with Jack again, it’s late and I had to sneak back in but it’s my only chance to be with him alone.
“So...What on earth happened today?” Jack asks, we’re lying on our sides almost nose to nose, I can feel his warm breath on my face.
“Honestly I’m not quite sure... I don’t think we’ll ever really know, I do have a theory though”
“Well it’s got to be better than mine”
“Why? What’s your idea?”
“That we were part of a mind control test my aliens” I laugh, Jack rubs in his hand over my cheek as I do.
“Yeah, yeah I don’t think that’s quite what happened”
“What did then clever boy?” he asks smirking.
“Well why you were with your family I did a little... Research and I think she was a demon” Jack laughs.
“A demon, where on earth did you get that idea?”
“Well that’s what she said!”
“And you believed her?” Jack laughs.
“Jack you tried to kill both of us with mind control, she definitely ain’t human!”
“Yeah yeah I don’t know this whole thing’s so weird, do you think we really stopped her?”
“I hope so, I don’t want to lose you Jacky”
“Me neither ‘Lex, do you think we would have met if it wasn’t for all this scary shit that’s just happened?” he asks.
“I don’t know... The important thing is that we’re together, even if it is a bit of weird story”.
Jack smiles and I kiss him lightly on the lips.
“I keep thinking I’m going to wake up and this we’ll have been something amazing if not slightly scary dream” I say.
“Haha yeah this is the weirdness fucking thing that’s ever happened but also the best”
“Jack, can I ask you something?”
“Yeah, what’s up?”
“Are hmm you my boyfriend now?” I ask, awkwardly.
“Do you want me to be?” I look at the boy smiling at me, I can’t help smiling back.
“Yes”
“Guess that makes you my boyfriend then” he kisses me sweetly on the lips, his free hand running through the ends of my hair.

Having been in a coma for over two months it’s still two more weeks before they actually let Jack out of hospital. I make sure I’m there to meet him. I go up to his room, he’s sitting on his bed waiting for me. It’s the first time I’ve seen him in actual clothes and those stupid hospital pyjamas, he’s wearing black skinny jeans and a Blink t shirt, his hair looks straightened and sticks up in strange places.
“Wow” I say.
“What?”
“You look amazing”
“You don’t look half bad yourself” I look down, I’ve got a pair of grey skinny jeans on, with a light blue shirt and jacket that I’ve got to sleeves rolled up.
“That’s because I’ve got a surprise for you”
“You do?”
“Come on” I grab with hand, he throws his back over his shoulder and we walk towards to elevator.
“So what’s changed why I was in your head?” he asks.
“Well The Ravens are winning, Green Day put out a video for Wake Me When September Ends and it’s one of the most heart wrenching things I’ve ever seen”
“Fuck yeah Ravens!” I start walking towards the door but Jack tugs me back.
“Huh?”
“I gotta sign out first”
“Oh”
Why Jack signs papers so they’ll actually let him out I lean against the desk. Two men are on the other side; they seem to be waiting for something. One’s very tall with longish brown wavy hair and the other’s shorter with shorter light brown hair and freckles.
“How can I help you gentleman?” A Doctor asks them.
“We’re here looking for this person” The shorter man says, with a Texas accent. The Doctor takes the paper and then goes off to look at something, the taller of the man catches me looking at them and I look away.
“Sorry Gentleman I’m afraid he’s just signed out” I hear the Doctor say.
Just then Jack reappears.
“All good, let’s go”
“Okay”
As we walk out I look back over my shoulder, the taller man is looking at me again. I quickly turn away and carry on out the hospital.
“This is your car?” Jack asks as I lead him into the car park and stop in front of an old beat up pick up.
“No it’s my dad’s” I say, I don’t tell him that since I hijacked my mum’s car to get to the hospital and left it at the side of the highway ‘Where anyone could have taken it’ that she no longer let’s me drive it...
“So where are we going?” Jack asks.
“It’s a surprise, I told you!” I laugh. I drove for about an hour back into Baltimore, we sing loudly along to Blink all the way.
“Here we are” I say, pulling up in the harbour. I park the car and take Jack’s hand as we walk down the front.
“So going to tell me yet?” He asks.
“Nearly” I stop outside one of the restaurants.
“You’re taking me to dinner?”
“I’m taking my boyfriend on a date, to celebrate you not being dead”
“Ha, thanks ‘Lex”
We sit down by the window, so we can see a view of harbour; all the boats going along the water it looked peaceful.
“It looks so pretty out there” I say.
“It’s so strange going from not being able to see anything to be being able to see everything” he says, staring out the window.
“What was it like? Just being a voice?”
“Weird, especially when you were asleep and I could just call out into nothingness. But when you were there, you have no idea how it feels to be so alone for that long and then to find someone. You were the thing keeping me sane, keeping me alive”
“You... You were the voice inside my head that spoke reason why my whole world was crashing around me, you keep me smiling” Jack’s hand slides in to mine under the table.
“I love you Alex”
“I love you too”
We eat dinner, talking about anything and everything from the last Raven games to guitars.
“That was lovely, thank you Alex” Jack says, taking my hand as we walk out of the restaurant.
“It’s not over yet Jacky”
“Oh?” We walk back to the car and I open the back pulling out my acoustic.
“You’re going to play for me?”
“Shh, all will be reviled” I say, holding my guitar in one hand and Jack’s hand in the other we walk down to the front. I take Jack to very end of the harbour, along the wooden boardwalk. I sit down, with my feet tangling over the edge, my guitar on my lap and Jack sitting cross legged beside me.
“These last few weeks with you have been amazing so I started writing this song... And yeah” Jack just smiles as I start to strum.
“Hey there it’s good to see you again, it never felt right calling this just friends
I’m happy if you’re happy with yourself.
Take off your shirt, your shoes those skinny jeans I brought for you
Were driving in, there’s nothing left to lose
I’m gonna break down this walls, I built around myself
I wanna fall so in love with you and no one else
Could mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we’ll move on, just don’t turn around
Let the walls break down
I used to wear you like a ball and chain, I’d run and hide at the call of my name
It was obvious you were too much for me, oblivious I was young and horny
In retrospect I wouldn’t do it again
Stop talking to shit to every one of your friends
I’m not the same boy you knew back then
‘Cause I can break down these walls, I built around myself
I wanna fall so in love with you, and no one else
Could mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we can move on just don’t turn around
Let the walls break down
I can’t breathe, my body’s shaking
You’ve got away with the way you take me
‘Cause you break me down, you know you break me down
I’m gonna break down these walls, I built around myself
I want to fall so in love with you and no one else
Could mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we’ll move on, just don’t turn around
Let the walls break down
Break down these walls I built around myself
Let the walls break down
‘Cause you break me down
Let the walls break down”

As I stop strumming the last chords I look up at Jack, there’s a huge smile on his face and slight tears in his eyes.
“Sorry, was it that bad?”
“My god Alex that was amazing” he says, wiping the tears from his eyes.
“Thank you” I smile
“Here show me what you’ve got” I pass my guitar over to him.
“I haven’t played in ages!” He says, wrapping his fingers around the neck and gently plucking the strings. He starts playing, his tongue sticking out as he thinks.
“Hey I know this song” I say, Jack laughs. He’s playing Blink-182 song Dammit and quite well at that for someone who hasn’t played for two months.
“You’re not bad” I say.
“Not as good as you though”
“I haven’t been nearly dead for two months!” I joke.
We sit there on the edge of harbour watching the sun go down, Jack playing random songs on the guitar why I sing, hours go past and we don’t even notice.
“We could do it you know” he says after awhile of silence.
“Do what?”
“Start a band”
“You really think so?”
“Your talent and my dick jokes, we’d be perfect”
“Hmm Jack, there’s only two of us”
“Okay first we kidnap two more members, but what do you say? Do you want to be in a band with me?”
“Jack I want to spend my life with you, and I can’t imagine a better why than sharing the stage”
“I love you Alex” He kisses me; he tastes like summer with a slight hint of pizza.
“I love you too, so much” I say once we pull apart. There’s a splash and I look down at the water below us, my guitar is floating on the water.
“Jack!”
“Oops”
“I can’t believe I’m in a band with such an idiot...”
“Hey!”
“You just dropped my guitar into the harbour!” At that we both crack up laughing. A band with Jack would be eventful to say the least, but I love him and he loves me. He’s no longer just the voice inside my head but the only by my side.
The End