Oh, Calamity

The next few days passed by pretty quickly. I hung out with Mika and the rest of the group pretty much every day, even after school. Alex’s jealousy kept rising and when he had asked me to get a towel for him the other day for his shower, I swore he almost kissed me when I handed it to him. Sitting on my bed, I smiled to myself. Zack and I were pretty good actors and even though we’re pretending, Zack seems almost a bit too committed to this.

Zack came over every day, even coming with me to hang out with my other friends. Mika told me that they all liked him and he was a cool guy, which I guess was a good thing. Still, I can’t help but wonder if Zack is still pretending or if it’s nothing like that anymore. My phone rang then, pulling me out of my thoughts, and as if thinking about him conjured his call, I picked up.

“Hey, Zack. What’s up?” I said, laying back onto my bed.

“Nothing much, just wanted to see if you had any plans tomorrow afternoon.” Tomorrow was Thursday, and to be honest the only plans I had were hanging out with Mika and Dylan. I was about to tell Zack, but I stopped. If he wasn’t pretending about his feelings for me anymore, I didn’t want to lead him on by accident. I decided I would just see him next Tuesday when the band had their next practice.

“Sorry Zack, but I have plans with Mika and Dylan. It's just going to be the three of us this time.” I felt mildly guilty, but I didn’t like Zack like that. I sighed. “I’m sorry, but I’m kind of booked for the next few days. Though, Jasey is throwing a party on Friday at her place and she said I could invite everyone. Even Alex.” That part wasn’t a lie. Jasey hosts a party at least once a month and this was it for this month. She said I could bring anyone I wanted, even Alex if I decided to.

“Ah, alright. Well I’ll text you tomorrow then. Good night, Kit-Kat.” He sounded...disappointed? Sad? Ugh, I didn’t have the time to decipher his voice.

“Good night, Zack-attack.” I hung up and stared at the ceiling. I knew I needed to talk to him about this but how would I even begin to bring the subject up? “Oh, Zack, I've been meaning to ask. Are your feelings for me real or are we still pretending?” Yeah, like that wouldn’t be awkward.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

I looked at my clock on the side table. 1:00 A.M. it read and that’s how I knew it was Alex knocking on my door. I got up off the bed and made my way to my door, opening it to find Alex with a massive case of bedhead. “Nice hairdo, Lex.” He grunted. “What’s up?”

“Had a bad dream, figured you’d still be awake. Mind if I come in and sit with you?” He asked. I moved aside so he could make his way in and to my bed. This was weird, I thought. Last I checked, we weren’t exactly speaking to each other. I climbed onto my bed and sat next to him. Several moments of silence went by before either one of us spoke. “Hey, Kat…” Alex started.

“Hmm?”

“I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?” I asked, taken back by the sudden apology. He sighed and ran a hand through his tangled hair.

“I know you know the reason I broke up with you. I remember hearing Cassie brag about how she ‘put you in your place’. I know how much of an ass I was and have been to you and I’m so sorry, Katherine. It must have sucked so much for you and I was avoiding the confrontation just to save myself. It’s been eating at me ever since. I broke up with you because you deserve better than this, better than me.” He looked at me. “You’re truly an amazing and beautiful girl and I fucked up royally. I’ve been holding back so much just because i don't want to ruin this any further. It also seemed like you and Zack were getting along so well. I wouldn't want to ruin that if it was serious. If I kissed you right now, or even hugged you right now, I feel like nothing will be the same between us.” His voice cracked, like he was on the verge of crying. It was awkward talking to him about this, but deep inside I knew I still loved him. What I said next surprised us both.

“It’s alright, Alex. I forgive you.” It surprised me the most, I believe, because I actually meant it. It wasn’t just empty words.

“You do?” He looked shocked, like he thought I would have never forgiven him. I nodded and out of habit I pulled him close to me and hugged him. He hesitated at first, but soon enough he returned the hug. We sat like that, embraced in each other for a few moments. He was the first to pull away, and I noticed that a few tears had escaped his eyes, making trails down his cheeks. I smiled softly at him.

“Are we okay now?” He nodded and wiped his eyes with his hands.

“Yeah, we’re good.” He smiled. He seemed so happy now that all the drama has dissipated between us and I found myself admiring just how cute he was. Sure his hair was a mess right now and he hasn’t shaved in a few days but overall he was cute. Sexy. I bit my lip, suddenly realizing how badly I wanted to kiss him. He must have felt the same, because one second we were on opposite sides of the bed and the next we were pretty much on top of each other.

He kissed me with such raw passion, I couldn’t help but think about how much I’ve missed him and how he must of felt the same. Apart, we were two totally different people. Together, it was like we were one. The kisses became harder, deeper. He hadn’t been wearing a shirt when he had come into my room and I was glad about it. I dug my nails into his back as he kissed and sucked on my neck. I was feeling everything all at once: love, happiness, anxiety and being so turned on that I thought I might explode.

He pulled off my shirt to reveal my bare breasts and he stopped to drink me in. “You’re so beautiful, Katherine” He breathed before trailing kisses from my lips to my neck then down to my chest. It felt so right, being with him. Being in his arms. The rest of our clothing came off and our bodies moved in perfect rhythm together. It took every ounce of my willpower not to moan and call his name. It was a surprise his parents hadn’t already come barging in complaining about the noise. I guess we must have been pretty good at being quiet though, because no one came in. It was just Alex and me, and nothing has ever felt more right.