Young Dreamers

The rest of the week was busy. Very busy. Making arrangements, taking calls, telling Sara things, dealing with the florist and the caterer, it was almost too busy for me to think about Oli. But not quite, and I had almost a day to steal glances in his direction.

That day I walked downstairs to find Oli struggling to carry a large box.
"Hey, let me help with tha-"

"It's fine."

"Oh c'mon, look at you you're-"

"I got it!" He snapped loudly, making me flinch. He sighed and left, leaving me standing there feeling slightly hurt and annoyed.

I heard Sara's voice and I listened to what she said to him.
"What the hell was that?"

"Nothing he just..."

"He was trying to help you Oli, not shove your dick up his ass. You're pathetic." She stormed off and I cringed, feeling happy that she'd confronted him, but not happy that it was causing friction between them.

I busied myself mowing the lawn of the garden and putting up the signs to the beach. When the sun got too strong I peeled my shirt off and lied down on the grass, feeling the sun sink into my skin. I heard footsteps after a few minutes and sighed inwardly.
"Hey."

"Hi."

"Look John I'm sorry about-"

"Not the first time it's happened. And don't waste your breath apologising just cause Sara told you to." He sighed.

"I am sorry though. I just..."

"Look Oli, for whatever reason, my sexuality bothers you, and frankly I don't give a fuck about that. But I am not prone to falling for straight guys, and you're getting married. So just chill."

"But that's the thing. It doesn't. I don't know why I feel like this I've never had a problem with it before, I just feel, I dunno, on edge." I laughed and I could feel his eyes on me.

"Dude, you're getting married!" He laughed unexpectedly and nodded.

"Yeah I guess there is that." I shook my head and chuckled.

"Anyways, take a load off." He sat down next to me and lied back, pulling off his shirt too, when he lied down properly his shoulder was against mine, making me tense up, but neither one of us moved for fear of looking bad. Unless he just didn't notice. Not that it even mattered, it was just our shoulders touching for Christ's sake.
Even though I kept telling myself that, my heartbeat didn't calm down for some time.

"So, are you scared about getting married?"

"Fucking terrified. But y'know....she's, she's the one."

"She's amazing...god I miss that feeling."

"You don't have that with anyone?"

"Nope. Free as a bird. It was fun during my teens and early twenties. Y'know it was all just clubbing and dancing and sex. God the sex...." Oli laughed at me.

"But I'd actually like to just settle down with someone who I feel that way for y'know? But I guess...ain't gonna happen." Oli nudged me.

"Don't say that. You're a catch. And I've only known you for two days and I think that." I laughed gently.

"Thanks."

"So you've never settled with anyone?"

"Once."

"What happened?"

"He was a trainee doctor. He got a job in Africa working with sick children. So off he went, taking my willingness to commit to a relationship and my favourite shark tooth necklace with him." Oli sighed.

"What?"

"Why didn't you go with him?"

"Cause I was at uni, and we made all these plans to stay together, but when he left? He made it pretty clear that that wasn't gonna happen."

"I guess he wanted you to move on." Oli said quietly, I nodded slowly.

"Yeah..."

We talked back and forth for the rest of the afternoon with beers, while the girls were out shopping. Every now and then he'd say or do something that made my heart stop, but other than that I was pretty ok with it all.
"Hey! You slackers!" Oli pointed at them.

"Me and John have been working our nuts off while you two were shopping!"

"Right..." Sara replied sarcastically and Oli nodded.

"Yeah, right. So go grab a beer and bring your pretty little ass back here." The girls laughed and went to get a beer, when they returned I forced myself to keep smiling, trying to ignore the hurt I felt when I watched them together, Sara in his lap, and Oli holding her gently.

That night when I went to bed, I couldn't sleep, spending hours on end turning my thoughts over and over in my head until they hardly made sense anymore. I was so against gay guys liking straight guys. It just didn't make sense to me, it wasn't practical.
But now that I was starting to feel that was for a straight guy myself, I was starting to understand why the others did it. It just couldn't be helped.