Diary
Entry Three
I’m being a total girl.
A complete girly, bubbly, feeling-y, lovey-dovey girl.
Ew.
I can’t help it though. He mentioned wanting to hang out when I get back in town, and I’m pretty excited. Stoked. Thrilled. I really can’t wait to get back to Houston now. All I think about is what we’re going to do when we hang out, and I keep rereading our old text messages. I just really hope I don’t mess this one up like I did all the other ones. I really would like to have an actual boyfriend this time.
Gracious, I really know how to ruin relationships. I’ve used the word ‘really’ way too many times, must be the girliness. I think maybe I’m too forthcoming with information and don’t make myself unavailable enough. Which is stupid. If two people are into each other, you shouldn’t have to play these stupid games. Like the whole, “wait this period of time before you text back” bullshit. Like wtf is that?! Why is that necessary? But whatever. That’s life, I guess.
Also, I think I’m maybe a little too honest. But if you were a grown ass man, wouldn’t you want to know if your “prospective girlfriend” isn’t interested in premarital sex BEFORE you started developing feelings for her? I thought I was doing them a favor. I haven’t told J yet only because we JUST started “talking” and also because he probably doesn’t even realize I like him. Like, I can’t believe he fell for that whole “I lost my contacts” spiel. Buuuuut, whatever. I’m not complaining.
I wonder if he has sex. I can’t really imagine him doing that. Not that he’s unattractive or anything. He’s just kind of awkward. Like me. Which is why I like him. He’s really the first guy I’ve been around that I’ve actually felt like myself with. All the others, I felt like I had to stunt or pretend to be a cooler version of myself around them. But J? He’s comfortable.
He’s also 21. Hooooooot! I’m hoping this means that he’s mature. I’m so damn tired of getting all emotional and caught up and lovey-dovey over these immature fiends.
I really hope this works out simply because if it doesn’t, I’m going to want to shoot my face off for writing this stupid, girly entry.
Ew.
Gah! I hope he texts me tonight!
Ew, again. Ok. I’m done being this girly fluffy fool. Night.
A complete girly, bubbly, feeling-y, lovey-dovey girl.
Ew.
I can’t help it though. He mentioned wanting to hang out when I get back in town, and I’m pretty excited. Stoked. Thrilled. I really can’t wait to get back to Houston now. All I think about is what we’re going to do when we hang out, and I keep rereading our old text messages. I just really hope I don’t mess this one up like I did all the other ones. I really would like to have an actual boyfriend this time.
Gracious, I really know how to ruin relationships. I’ve used the word ‘really’ way too many times, must be the girliness. I think maybe I’m too forthcoming with information and don’t make myself unavailable enough. Which is stupid. If two people are into each other, you shouldn’t have to play these stupid games. Like the whole, “wait this period of time before you text back” bullshit. Like wtf is that?! Why is that necessary? But whatever. That’s life, I guess.
Also, I think I’m maybe a little too honest. But if you were a grown ass man, wouldn’t you want to know if your “prospective girlfriend” isn’t interested in premarital sex BEFORE you started developing feelings for her? I thought I was doing them a favor. I haven’t told J yet only because we JUST started “talking” and also because he probably doesn’t even realize I like him. Like, I can’t believe he fell for that whole “I lost my contacts” spiel. Buuuuut, whatever. I’m not complaining.
I wonder if he has sex. I can’t really imagine him doing that. Not that he’s unattractive or anything. He’s just kind of awkward. Like me. Which is why I like him. He’s really the first guy I’ve been around that I’ve actually felt like myself with. All the others, I felt like I had to stunt or pretend to be a cooler version of myself around them. But J? He’s comfortable.
He’s also 21. Hooooooot! I’m hoping this means that he’s mature. I’m so damn tired of getting all emotional and caught up and lovey-dovey over these immature fiends.
I really hope this works out simply because if it doesn’t, I’m going to want to shoot my face off for writing this stupid, girly entry.
Ew.
Gah! I hope he texts me tonight!
Ew, again. Ok. I’m done being this girly fluffy fool. Night.
April 6th, 2014
BeeCeeOh!
BeeCeeOh!