We Found Each Other in the Dark

I awoke to the color lilac, and an excruciating throbbing in my head. Sweat was resting on my back from the sun that had been beating down through my window for god knows how long, and something had settled on my butt. Picking my face up from the pillow I looked to my left to see a sleeping Michael. His body was sprawled out like mine had been with his face towards my door, while his right arm was stretched towards me…his hand being the thing that was resting protectively on my butt. A small, sleep covered groan came quietly from my mouth and I let my face meet the pillow again. I didn’t think I had that much to drink last night, but apparently I did seeing as no matter how hard I searched my brain for any memories all I could remember was the creepy bouncer at the entrance of the club. Nova! Sudden panic washed over me and I frantically searched next to me for my phone, trying to not disturb Michael. I found my phone along with several text messages from Nova.

“Where the fuck did you go?!”

“Jackie, please text me back!”

“Did you leave with someone?!”

“Going home, hopefully you’re safe. Text me tomorrow bitch xx”

And so on and so on…I let my eyes close again attempting to get rid of the pain in my head. When I opened them again, time must have slipped past me. Michael was facing me now, his hand around my waist and I somehow ended up closer to him. His expression was blank until he noticed my eyes on his. A timid almost guilt stricken smile crept up on his lips and he blinked slowly. I ran my hand across my face and considered closing my eyes again.

“How long have you been watching me?” I asked groggily.

Michael bit down on his lower lip and let out a sigh.

“Long enough to make me look like a creep.” He admitted.

No matter how hard I wanted to still be mad at him, a small chuckle came from my throat. It was no use trying to hate him, truth was I was completely infatuated with the kid and I was ready to stop this whole not talking thing. I scooted closer to him and put my face against his neck while he rested his chin on top of my head, snaking his arm up my back.

“I’m sorry if I was rude to you last night.” I finally said swallowing my pride.

Michael’s hand began massaging my back comfortingly.

“I totally deserved it.” He whispered, “But I’m glad we’re alright.”

Against my will I let my body shift away from his, our eyes connecting.

“Why did you ignore me Michael?”

I had been dying to know for the past week and if he told me last night there was no way I was going to remember. He sighed and buried his face in the pillow briefly. When he looked at me again there was something behind his eyes that made me shudder.

“I was worried I made an ass out of myself that day at your house.” He said.

I furrowed my eyebrows and felt my temper slipping.

“Why didn’t you just tell me that?” I pried.

Michael inhaled quickly and let his fingers trace the bones in my face.

“I was embarrassed and figured if I texted you, you wouldn’t reply.”

I leaned my face into his hand and shut my eyes, realizing that bringing this conversation up was stupid…I was completely over it and I hadn’t even realized it.

“I liked it.” I admitted with my eyes still shut.

Michael’s hand stopped mid stroke of my cheek forcing my eyes open. His face was twisted with confusion bringing a chuckle up from my stomach.

“I liked when you were on top of me.” I repeated sternly.

His mouth opened but nothing came out. I shook my head growing tired of my on-going headache and the fact that he was completely oblivious.

“Michael just kiss me, please.” I said blatantly.

He let his eyes stream up and down my face for a second before slowly inching his face closer to mine. I met him halfway my lips wanting nothing more then to finally feel his. His hand that had snaked up my back held the back of my head to make sure I couldn’t pull away, and mine cupped his cheek. Our bodies were stuck together with sweat and I found myself instinctively wrapping a leg around his waist. His free hand wrapped around my hip gripping hungrily at my behind, pulling my groin into his. Fingers tangled in hair while tongues tangled together and as craving overtook logic I found myself on top of him. Our mouths never parted for longer then a second and my body was uncontrollably grinding against him…the bulge beneath his thin cotton boxers growing harder. A sudden, loud vibrating came from underneath of him throwing me off of him instantly as if I had been caught doing something wrong. I sat on my knees across from him and watched as he fished his phone out from under him. His eyes trailed the screen and without looking away from it he told me he must have forgotten about band practice. A low irritated sigh spilled from my mouth and I plopped back onto the bed, the cool sheets drying my back.

“Apparently we’re having a bbq tonight as well.” Michael informed as he pulled on his jeans.

I took a pillow and threw it over my face, the room beginning to spin for whatever reason. I mumbled a “that’s cool” into the pillow and felt the part of the bed by my feet sink in. Seconds later the pillow was being removed and Michael was hovering above me, grinning like a fool.

“What?” I half-whispered absentmindedly mimicking his smile.

Before saying anything his eyes shadowed up and down my face again. His hand began stroking my hair and for a minute I forgot what we were talking about.

“You should come tonight.” He said suddenly sounding almost timid.

My eyes widened slightly as my stomach fell to my toes.

“Would that be cool?” I asked, “With your friends I mean.”

He pulled his head back as if offended and then smirked smugly.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” He questioned, “The mates’ll love you.”

My cheeks were warm now and my heart suddenly sped up. What if they didn’t love me? What if they absolutely hated me and didn’t want Michael around me anymore? Why did I care?

“Jackie?” Michael inquired after I went completely silent and stiff.

I looked at him as he stared blankly at me.

“I don’t…I don’t know…” I stumbled over my words, “I don’t wanna intrude.”

Michael scoffed and then sat up, hand still tangled in my hair.

“You’re not intruding, I invited you.” He stated.

I chewed nervously on the inside of my mouth, playing with the strings that were sticking out from the hole in his jeans.

“Sure.” I finally said haphazardly. “Yeah I’ll come.”

His grip around my head tightened with excitement and without warning he leaned down to peck my lips quickly with his. I watched him slide out of the bed, but decided I was going to stay put.

“Ill see you tonight, yeah?” He said once he was at my bedroom door.

I nodded silently and just like the last time he was here he vanished through my door without a word. The knot in my stomach had tightened without me noticing at first, until I could almost taste vomit in my mouth. Why did I agree to go tonight?

When I pulled into Michael’s driveway, my panicked state from before began all over again. The entire day I went over ridiculous scenarios in my head…I’d show up, know no one besides Michael and have to be up his ass all night to avoid being alone, or I’d show up know no one and have Michael ignore me the whole time too busy with his friends to notice my existence. I worried about the second one so much that I almost considered telling him I was sick suddenly and couldn’t come. The fear of another girl being there and being all over Michael was another scenario…the scenario that forced me out of bed and into my car. I took a deep breath and leaned my head against the top of my car seat. After about 10 minutes I finally was able to get out and walk up the lit walkway. Music bumped through the walls and I could see people in the foyer through the tall glass doors. Jesus Christ… Without knocking I slowly pushed open the heavy door and instantly felt like I was drowning.

There were people everywhere and the music that quickly took over my brain made every other sound go fuzzy. Keeping my lips in a pursed line, my eyes darted around the entryway trying to see anyone who even looked similar to Michael. When it was a no go I decided to squeeze through swarms of people and into the next room; the kitchen. Although it wasn’t exactly what I had been searching for, the large amount of alcohol placed on the island in the middle of the kitchen caught my attention instantly. I “excused” my way through more people and found a red cup, eager to fill it with the strongest alcohol I could find first. Sucking it down like I hadn’t had anything to drink in weeks, I smiled to myself as the liquor burned straight down to my stomach. Another drink was poured and I figured I better go find Michael before I looked like a strange alcoholic. Before I could take another step towards the sliding doors that lead to the back yard, something ran into me knocking me forward a bit…my cup of toxins splashing over the top a bit.

“Fuck.” I groaned before turning to see what collided with me.

“What” turned out to be a who…and that who was a tall boy around my age and he was just shy of being a god. He looked just as stunned as I was, but it was for a different reason I’m sure. A bandana held back his wavy lightish brown/blonde colored hair and his jeans were tighter then the ones I owned. He wore a muscle tank covered in holes and the holes in his hazel colored eyes were filled with speckles of green.

“I am so sorry.” He stuttered letting his eyes examine me.

I couldn’t help but smile timidly, his politeness coming as a surprise.

“It’s ok really, I filled my cup up too high anyways.” I joked with a small chuckle.

He laughed at my comment and then held out his hand.

“Ashton.” He introduced once I put my hand in his, “I live here.”

I pulled my lips into my mouth and my stomach did a flip.

“J-Jackie.” I said shakily over the music.

Ashton’s eyes suddenly lit up and he looked as if he suddenly realized he was in the presence of someone famous.

“Holy shit!” He cried, eyeing me up and down. “So you’re Jackie!”

The way he emphasized the “you’re” as if he had read about me in a magazine made me slightly uneasy. I nodded slowly not sure of what to say. Ashton’s once wide open mouth relaxed into a smile and he put a hand on my shoulder.

“Michael hasn’t stopped talking about you since you guys met.” He admitted bluntly, “I remember you from the bar now.”

Again my cheeks were burning and I felt like running. It felt too comfortable with his hand on my skin and with just his touch it was as if we had just had sex. His smile was absolutely intoxicating making him look sexy, while the dimples that dented in made him adorable. He was breathtaking and although Michael and I weren’t officially “together” I felt almost guilty for letting my mind wonder towards inappropriate thoughts about this boy I literally just met.

“Do you know where Michael is?” I asked ripping myself from my thoughts.

Ashton looked stunned that I randomly spat that out, but looked over my shoulder through the glass doors. I followed his eyes and saw Michael standing by the fire talking to a dark haired boy in a beanie. As if sensing my attention Michael looked up, his mouth pulling up into a wide grin when our eyes met. Butterflies beat hard against the lining of my stomach and for a second I felt like it was only me and him. Remembering Ashton, I turned back to him and smiled apologetically.

“It was nice meeting you…!” I said.

He grinned, but he also looked upset that I was so anxious to run to Michael.

“Hopefully I’ll see you again soon.” He said before I darted outside.

As the night went on, and more alcohol swam through my bloodstream I noticed more often that wherever I was, Ashton somehow managed to appear as if he knew I was there. At some point I think Michael noticed it too, a protective arm wrapped around my waist instantly. I couldn’t help but let my eyes trail over him though whenever Michael wasn’t paying attention. I’d smile drunkenly at him and he’d wink…his tongue running between his lips every time like he was thinking the same dirty thoughts as I was. While we played beer pong towards the end of the night, we ended up being on a team together…Michael deciding he was over the whole drinking thing and going up to bed. Ashton stood behind me the whole time and at some point his fingers gripped at the skin that was exposed from my cropped t-shirt. Jolts of electricity flew to every limb in my body every time I’d remember he was touching me and my stomach burned. To everyone around us it looked only as if we were good friends, but our silent flirtation was something much more then that.

“Can you show me to Michael’s room?” I asked him after a quick cigarette break.

Although he looked somewhat hurt, Ashton silently agreed and led the way upstairs without a word. I stumbled behind him drunkenly, my mind too drenched in hunger to think logically. When Ashton stopped in front of a closed door I leaned my back against it not exactly wanting to go in.

“Thanks for being my teammate.” He said putting his hand against the door next to my face.

I smirked smugly and wrapped my hand around the back of my neck.

“It was fun.” I said cheerfully, my eyes heavy with tiredness.

“I bet you’re really fun.” Ashton muttered almost inaudibly.

I covered up my gasp with a cough and suddenly felt sick. What? He caught onto my sudden shock and quickly backed away.

“I…I probably shouldn’t have said that.” He mumbled immediately sobering up.

Again I chewed the inside of my mouth and attempted to slow down my heart.

“I should probably go to sleep.” I stated as the urge to sleep took over the want for attention.

It took a minute but eventually Ashton nodded and without a word bolted down the hallway. I stood there stunned but ultimately wanted nothing more then to just sleep. While I laid in Michael’s bed that night, the room spinning violently, I replayed the entire night…the memory of Ashton’s actions causing my stomach to flutter with both excitement and shame. Michael and I weren’t technically together, but here I was in bed with him once again…his arm draped possessively over my waist and my feelings for him pulling hard on my heartstrings. Pushing the thoughts of Ashton deep into the back of my brain, I blamed everything on the alcohol...and as Michael nuzzled his face into my neck I was reassured that what happened between Ashton and I tonight was definitely because of all the alcohol…