The Conductor

He hasn’t spoken to me for nine days.
He builds as many marionettes as possible, and then he leaves without a word.

Of course I asked where he would go plenty of times, but he would not answer me.

All I know is that he comes back home every time, the scent of some fragrance lingering on his skin and pink smudges on his shirt and lips.

There’s no doubt: I’ve pushed him into the arms of the Harlot, and she’s gladly taking the advantage.

I shouldn’t let it bother me, I have work to do.

Arms.
Legs.

Hands.
Feet.

Torso.
Neck.
Head.

“Connect with the screws…”

Nose.
Mouth.
Lips.
Eyes.

“Carve and paint…”

Hair.
Clothes.

“Sew, stitch, and glue…”

Strings.

“Another final product.”

| x | x | x |

“May 4th,

Our relationship has hit a rough path.

Tyler tries to avoid me in almost any way possible – it is obvious that I pushed him into the arms of the Harlot that is known as Sarah.

His behavior has become more questionable – his small bouts of independence and rebellion, and the kiss he had forced upon me.

I had to correct him, and I feel that I will still have to correct him. He should not be in love with another man.

He should not be in love with me.

The troubling thing is, I want him to be with a woman, but I don’t want him to be with Sarah.

I can tell that she is only using Tyler, playing with him like a toy until the point that he breaks.
And all Hell with break loose if Tyler freely shows her his scars—”

I stopped writing when I heard the door shut downstairs.

He’s home later than usual.

Quiet footsteps up the stairs until they stopped at the door.

“Michael…?”

I didn’t respond

“You’re ignoring me in return…”

I still kept quiet.

“I’m sorry…You’re angry with me and I’m sorry…”

I bit down on my lip.

“Why haven’t you entered, Tyler?”

There was no response at first.

“I don’t want you to see me…”

I stood up from my chair and slowly made my way to the door.

“What do you mean?”

Once again, there was no response.

I placed my hand on the doorknob and turned it, opening the door and revealing Tyler.
My mouth opened slightly in shock.

A bruise was forming under his eye. Blood painted the corner of his lip.
His shirt was wrinkled and buttoned haphazardly – the collar was open, revealing dark, reddish-purplish marks on his neck and collarbone.

He stepped into the room and as I closed the door, he slowly looked up at me, sad blue eyes staring into mine.

“Sarah …She said that I was repulsive, physically and mentally…She called me a Sodomite…She locked me in a shed with a random man…and he…”

He bit down harshly on his lip, drawing blood.

“Is it so wrong for me to be in love with you…?”

I didn’t answer him again.

“Is it because I’m not perfect? Is it because of all of the scars that I bear on my skin?”

My breath caught in my throat.

“Is that why you hid your mirror from me? To hide how unattractive I really am?”

Tears started welling in his eyes.

“Is that why you don’t love me back…?”

I pressed my index finger onto his lips to stop him from talking.

“You must understand, Tyler. A man simply can’t love another man. Our society forbids it.”
“The man in the shed…”

I swallowed thickly before speaking again.

“He was trying to teach you a lesson in the worst of ways. He forced himself upon you to discourage what you feel, Tyler.”

I placed my hands onto his shoulders.

“You can’t love me, Tyler. It is forbidden, and our relationship wasn’t meant to take that form.”
He dropped his head down, tears now falling and small hiccups followed after.

“I can’t…I can’t stop loving you, Michael…! I really care for you, and if I stop…then who will?!”

He wiped his tears away, only to have more of them fall.

“I can’t help what I feel, Michael…and it’s weird because…I feel like I was made for you…that my purpose was to make sure that you wouldn’t be alone anymore.”

I was dumbstruck by his statement as he returned his attention to me.

“Why would you care so much about what society thinks when it’s only you and me against it…?”

Why do I care?

Because I make a living producing and selling marionettes to society?

Because even though I’m isolated inside my shop and home, I’m still part of society.

Because my wife and our unborn child would have been part of this society, and that last thing that I would want to do is make them disappointed in me.

I tore myself away from my thoughts and observed Tyler again – something in me…changed. Every bruise and mark caused a rise of anger in the pit of my stomach.

Sarah had planned this.
Those marks are all her fault.

Then the paranoia sunk in.

She saw his scars.
She knows my secret.
I’ll be jailed or killed if she tells anyone.

Tyler will be…I would have to…

Those feelings were replaced with that of sympathy and guilt after hearing Tyler’s small sobs.

I swore that I wouldn’t disown him. I swore that I wouldn’t abandon him.
I swore that I would protect him at all costs.

Yet, I’m already turning back on my own word.

I gently pushed Tyler back until he was against the door.

I have to make it up to him, regardless of what I feel or what society feels.

I hooked my finger under his chin to tilt his head up.
I inched closer, but stopped about several centimeters apart.

“I will only do this if you will let me.”

He nodded, a small blush already appearing on his cheeks.

Forgive me, Elizabeth.

And I closed in the space between us.

The sharing of saliva and tongue with the occasional taste of iron. This movement and the taste lasted for about two minutes.

I didn’t stop there – I made sure to kiss every visible mark that was left on Tyler by his predator.

“You’re more gentle than he was…”

I didn’t respond as I wiped his tears away.

“…I love you, Michael…”
“Don’t say such a thing so suddenly…”

“I still love you.” – He smiled for the first time in the past nine days.

“Let’s mend your injuries before we go to bed.”

And we did just that – Tyler was curled up in the sheets afterwards.

However, a small headache started to form, and I don’t remember reaching the bed before everything faded to black.