Hacked Off
3
That weekend, when Lars and Kirk were out on a date and Jason was visiting his aunt, James' plan was put into action. He, Dave and Junior stood in the living room, drinking beer and waiting for the computer to boot up.
The image of naked Lars appeared. Junior squealed and covered his eyes and Dave yelled with laughter.
"O-OK, I think I can get rid of that", Junior giggled.
"Good kid", said James, patting him on the shoulder. "You get that fucking thing off there and there's ten dollars in it for you".
"Alright then", said Junior. He caught Dave's eye and Dave winked.
"Um, well it may take a while and it'll be really boring watching me hack into the PC", said Junior. "Why don't you guys go and jam for a bit?"
"Um, OK then" said James.
"Yeah, sounds cool to me", said Dave.
The two guys went off to James' room while Junior set to work. James felt a little awkward at first, as he handed his spare guitar to Dave. However, once they started playing all their old songs from Kill 'Em All, he soon relaxed. It felt natural and easy and James had to admit, he really enjoyed jamming with Dave again.
About half an hour later, Junior called Dave and James back into the living room. When they arrived there, James had never been so glad to see dustbunnies on the desktop in all his life.
"There you go", Junior said, smiling sweetly. "All gone!"
"Junior, you're a fucking genius", said James. Taking his wallet out of his pocket, he pulled out a ten dollar bill and handed it to Junior.
"Thanks, James", said Junior, pocketing his money.
"Come on kid", said Dave, putting his arm around Juniors' shoulders. "Let me help you spend that on something awesome".
"OK Dave", said Junior, getting up off the computer chair. "Bye James, see you again soon".
"See ya James", said Dave, slapping James on the back.
James waved bye to the Megadeth guys and once he heard the front door close, he grinned evilly to himself.
Hahahah, just wait until Lars puts his PC on again. He'll wonder where that fucking photo went and he'll think I did it! No way will he ass around on the computer again, if he thinks I can hack too!
***********************************
The next morning, James was up bright and early, ready to watch Lars turn on the PC at the first opportunity. He sat on the settee, easting Cornflakes, drinking beer and trying not to smirk. Jason was sitting next to him, reading a rock magazine, Kirk was blow drying his hair and Lars was just booting up.
"Heheh, I can't wait to play that ace new RPG we bought yesterday", Lars said eagerly.
"You bought a RPG when you were out on a date with Kirk?" Jason enquired.
"Such a romantic little soul", James snickered.
"Shush!" said Lars. Doors booted up and the dustbunnies appeared on the desktop.
Then, Doors Media Player opened itself up and Rust in Peace began to play at full volume.
Jason gasped, James splurged out all his beer onto Jason's lap, Kirk conked himself in the nose with the hairdryer and Lars howled.
"My naked, sexy body! It's gone!"
"Fuck that!" James roared. "I'll kill them. Both of them! Ten fucking dollars I paid them, the pair of cockrings!"
"Kill who?" Jason asked, plainly trying not to laugh.
"Dave and Junior! I got them to come round and Junior hacked into the PC to get rid of the rude picture of Lars". James scowled and slammed his beer can down. He imitated Junior's voice. "Well it may take a while and it'll be really boring watching me hack into the PC. I paid that fucker ten dollars to corrupt our PC with his band!"
Jason assumed a horrified face. Kirk huffed and put his hairdryer down. Lars clicked the X in the corner of Doors Media Player but nothing happened.
"Yep, Junior's hacked it alright" said Lars, impressed. "I never knew he could do that sorta shit. I'm gonna have to call him up for a beer sometime".
"You'll be calling up the hospital for him if I see him first", James growled.
Lars chuckled. "Hey, chill James. It's OK; I can hack back in and fix this, no problemo".
"Good", said James and took a gulp of his beer.
Lars smiled at James sweetly. "However..."...
"However? Yeah, what?"
"I will require payment".
James sighed.
"Go on then? How fucking much?"
"I don't want any money", Lars giggled. "I was thinking of a new desktop background, actually..."...
"What kind of background?" Kirk asked.
"Let's say...that photo of James and Jason from last Christmas".
"You mean the one where we got drunk and we're dancing round in our underwear, performing the Dance of the Seven Veils?" Jason inquired, blushing.
James spluttered out his beer again. Jason now had a very soggy lap.
"That's the one", Lars giggled. "Go and fetch it James, or Rust in Peace stays!"
James tried to scowl again but then...suddenly, he saw the funny side. His lip twitched, then he began to laugh. This set Jason off too and soon all the guys were laughing hard.
"That fucking photo! Lars, you asshole", James grinned.
Jason pricked up his ears. "Lars' asshole? You want that on a desktop background?"
James nudged him in the ribs hard.
"Shush and go get us some more beer!"
The End
The image of naked Lars appeared. Junior squealed and covered his eyes and Dave yelled with laughter.
"O-OK, I think I can get rid of that", Junior giggled.
"Good kid", said James, patting him on the shoulder. "You get that fucking thing off there and there's ten dollars in it for you".
"Alright then", said Junior. He caught Dave's eye and Dave winked.
"Um, well it may take a while and it'll be really boring watching me hack into the PC", said Junior. "Why don't you guys go and jam for a bit?"
"Um, OK then" said James.
"Yeah, sounds cool to me", said Dave.
The two guys went off to James' room while Junior set to work. James felt a little awkward at first, as he handed his spare guitar to Dave. However, once they started playing all their old songs from Kill 'Em All, he soon relaxed. It felt natural and easy and James had to admit, he really enjoyed jamming with Dave again.
About half an hour later, Junior called Dave and James back into the living room. When they arrived there, James had never been so glad to see dustbunnies on the desktop in all his life.
"There you go", Junior said, smiling sweetly. "All gone!"
"Junior, you're a fucking genius", said James. Taking his wallet out of his pocket, he pulled out a ten dollar bill and handed it to Junior.
"Thanks, James", said Junior, pocketing his money.
"Come on kid", said Dave, putting his arm around Juniors' shoulders. "Let me help you spend that on something awesome".
"OK Dave", said Junior, getting up off the computer chair. "Bye James, see you again soon".
"See ya James", said Dave, slapping James on the back.
James waved bye to the Megadeth guys and once he heard the front door close, he grinned evilly to himself.
Hahahah, just wait until Lars puts his PC on again. He'll wonder where that fucking photo went and he'll think I did it! No way will he ass around on the computer again, if he thinks I can hack too!
***********************************
The next morning, James was up bright and early, ready to watch Lars turn on the PC at the first opportunity. He sat on the settee, easting Cornflakes, drinking beer and trying not to smirk. Jason was sitting next to him, reading a rock magazine, Kirk was blow drying his hair and Lars was just booting up.
"Heheh, I can't wait to play that ace new RPG we bought yesterday", Lars said eagerly.
"You bought a RPG when you were out on a date with Kirk?" Jason enquired.
"Such a romantic little soul", James snickered.
"Shush!" said Lars. Doors booted up and the dustbunnies appeared on the desktop.
Then, Doors Media Player opened itself up and Rust in Peace began to play at full volume.
Jason gasped, James splurged out all his beer onto Jason's lap, Kirk conked himself in the nose with the hairdryer and Lars howled.
"My naked, sexy body! It's gone!"
"Fuck that!" James roared. "I'll kill them. Both of them! Ten fucking dollars I paid them, the pair of cockrings!"
"Kill who?" Jason asked, plainly trying not to laugh.
"Dave and Junior! I got them to come round and Junior hacked into the PC to get rid of the rude picture of Lars". James scowled and slammed his beer can down. He imitated Junior's voice. "Well it may take a while and it'll be really boring watching me hack into the PC. I paid that fucker ten dollars to corrupt our PC with his band!"
Jason assumed a horrified face. Kirk huffed and put his hairdryer down. Lars clicked the X in the corner of Doors Media Player but nothing happened.
"Yep, Junior's hacked it alright" said Lars, impressed. "I never knew he could do that sorta shit. I'm gonna have to call him up for a beer sometime".
"You'll be calling up the hospital for him if I see him first", James growled.
Lars chuckled. "Hey, chill James. It's OK; I can hack back in and fix this, no problemo".
"Good", said James and took a gulp of his beer.
Lars smiled at James sweetly. "However..."...
"However? Yeah, what?"
"I will require payment".
James sighed.
"Go on then? How fucking much?"
"I don't want any money", Lars giggled. "I was thinking of a new desktop background, actually..."...
"What kind of background?" Kirk asked.
"Let's say...that photo of James and Jason from last Christmas".
"You mean the one where we got drunk and we're dancing round in our underwear, performing the Dance of the Seven Veils?" Jason inquired, blushing.
James spluttered out his beer again. Jason now had a very soggy lap.
"That's the one", Lars giggled. "Go and fetch it James, or Rust in Peace stays!"
James tried to scowl again but then...suddenly, he saw the funny side. His lip twitched, then he began to laugh. This set Jason off too and soon all the guys were laughing hard.
"That fucking photo! Lars, you asshole", James grinned.
Jason pricked up his ears. "Lars' asshole? You want that on a desktop background?"
James nudged him in the ribs hard.
"Shush and go get us some more beer!"
The End