I Feel More With Everyday That Goes By

I let out a frustrated groan when Morgan yelled at me to hurry for the eightieth time. No lie, I counted. I quickly undid the french braid I was trying to make as well as the one I’d already accomplished before opening the bathroom door. “I’m coming asshat!” I yelled.

I put my black boots over my skinny jeans and put my coat on over my red hoodie that Morgan had given me our freshman year of college. Not much was said as we walked out of the hotel and boarded a bus. Morgan pulled the yellow cord of the bus to indicate to the middle aged woman driving that we wanted off at the bus stop by the arena and I sent her a raised eyebrow in response.

She returned my unasked question with a sheepish look on her face. “I have a surprise,” she said as she shrugged her shoulders. I knew she was trying to tell me that this wasn’t her idea. Ovechkin. Really? He wanted me to sit through another one of his games like I really wanted to and listen to Morgan fawn all over him? He was deeper down on my shit list than I thought possible. On top of that we had walked up to Will Call to get out tickets and Alex had so kindly left us more Capitals merchandise for me to burn. After enough pleading from Morgan to make my ears bleed, I changed into the fucking shirt. There was only so much “You love me’s” I could stand. To make matters worse, the Capitals were hosting the Flyers, another team I couldn’t stand. I swear the whole world was conspiring against me.

Instead of continuing to be a debby downer, I decided that hockey was hockey and I should at least enjoy the game. I shouldn’t have done that. About ten minutes into the third period the Caps were leading seven to nothing. It was obvious even to the Flyers that they had no chance, so what did they do? Tried to take some of the Capital players out as a consolation prize. My teeth ground together when Laich was obviously boarded and nothing was called. I let it go because he didn’t look any worse for wear, but when Hartnell tripped Mike and nothing was called I may or may not have lost my temper.

I was not a fan of Hartnell on the ice. Off I’m sure he was the nicest person I have ever met, but on he was such an ASSHOLE! I mean trying to hurt both Brooks and Mike was just bad sportsmanship and just plain dirty playing. That was not okay with me. At least that’s what I was telling myself as my heart lurched in my chest as Mike limped down the runway to the locker room. Once Mike was out of sight I just let Hartnell have it. There were thousands of fans in the arena barking at him. I had been to a vast number of games and knew when to have the best chance of him hearing me. As the lull in the noise of arena came I ripped him a new one with every curse word I could think of.

Hartnell was skating his way to the penalty box when I started, so when he heard, his gaze he locked eyes with my screaming self. Do you know what that bitch did? HE FLIPPED ME OFF! WHAT A SORE LOSER! I just kept yelling at him. I threatened bodily harm and everything else I thought was appropriate for the whole two minutes he was sitting in the box.

After the game Morgan led the way to the locker room. She made polite conversation with some of the WAGs there while I just pretended I was listening. I didn’t see the point of making friends with them. It wasn’t like I was ever going to see them again, so the hell with it. Well that was the plan until a blond haired woman came up to me. “You look like you’re in pain. Not a Caps fan?” she asked with a kind smile. She looked around conspiratorially before whispering, “I’m a Penguins fan. Brooks hates it, but I won’t give up my team being from Pittsburgh and all.”

I sent her a relieved smile. “I’m a Penguins fan too.”

“I’m glad to meet a fellow fan. What brings you to a Capitals game?” she asked. She was a total sweetheart. She was one of the few people that fixed you with a kind and steady gaze and seemed to be listening attentively to everything that came out of a person’s mouth. It made me feel really good about myself. I could almost believe I was about to say something earth shattering if I was just basing that guess on her expression.

“Moral support for my friend. Ovechkin invited her to watch the game and hang out with him after,” I said making an awkward facial expression. I didn’t think Ovechkin was going to treat my friend like she should be treated, but I wasn’t going to tell her that so she’d bitch me out. Instead, I would be there to pick up the pieces if I needed.

She scrunched up to her cute little button nose and said, “Oh, well um that’s cool.” She shook her head as if to rid herself of the current topic. “I’m Meghan Conner by the way.”

I offered her my hand to shake, which she did, “Jennifer Landowski.”

“What do you do?” Meghan asked in order to make conversation.

“I’m in my last year of college before I go on to law school,” I told her.

She put a hand over her heart, “You make me seem so old, you are so young compared to me.”

“You’re quite a looker for the old lady you paint yourself to be.”

“That she is,” said a new voice. A man with a buzz cut, bright blue eyes, and a land dimpled smile walked up to us and put his hand on the small of Meghan’s back. Meghan blushed a crimson red to contrast her fair skin. The man kissed her on the cheek and then looked at me. He offered his large hand to me and said, “Brooks.”

“Jennifer,” I said smiling and shaking his hand quickly.

“She’s a Penguins fan too,” Meghan told him, to which he let out a groan.

“Not another one. We’re being infiltrated. Who are you here for? I need to have some words with them.”

“She came for me,” Mike’s voice sounded as he came up to our group. I ground my teeth together instead of tearing into him right then. Instead, I fixed him with my harshest glare.

Meghan shot a confused look from me to Mike and back again. She seemed to be trying to solve a very complicated math problem. She looked up at Brooks to see if he had any insight into what was going on. Brooks was busy looking at Mike. Both men seemed to be having a silent conversation with each other. This was getting awkward and I hated these kinds of situations and I was getting ready to cut my losses and book it out of here. “I thought her friend was here with Ovechkin?” Meghan tried.

I folded my arms across my chest and looked a Mike expectantly, having a rough time resisting the urge to tap my foot impatiently.

Mike seemed to ignore my annoyed disposition and spoke to Meghan, “Ovie invited Morgan and Jen both, but she was intended to be my guest. I got her ticket and that’s a pass to see me,” Mike said matter of fact and pointed to the locker room pass around my neck.

I wanted to slap myself in that moment. I looked like that kid that just started college that had their lanyard around their neck because they were afraid to lose it. I was clearly the newest member to the Capital’s inner group just like freshman were the newest members of a college. I hurriedly took the pass from around my neck and inspected it. I wanted to let out a huff when I read on the back of the pass, ‘Guest of Mike Green.’ Jeez, hockey players really were cavemen. I don’t know if that was Mike’s doing or just how to keep the guest passes organized. But really, couldn’t they just say guest and leave it at that? In all honesty, I felt like the pass was really saying, ‘Property of Mike Green, Back the Fuck Off.’

I completely ignored Mike and turned my full attention to the couple, “How did you two meet?” I asked them.

Brooks and Meghan both gained a wistful look on their face, “He changed my flat tire on the side of the road on my first trip to D.C. before my company opened a branch here.”

“She didn’t give me the time of day since I was a Caps player,” Brooks added with a playful eye roll to which Meghan lightly hit him on the arm.

“Sounds familiar,” Mike mumbled purposely loud enough for me to hear.

I shot him an unimpressed look. Maybe I was shunning Mike because he was a Capital, but I justified myself by thinking that I usually never gave any man the time of day. Someone I considered dating almost always was my friend first. I didn’t base my decision on the fact that a man was good looking and can hold a decent conversation with me, there was so much more to a person than the way he looked or spoke. I believed that actions spoke louder than words. The way the man acted around others was a big factor in my decision to date someone. My friends had to like him and he was to treat them the way he would treat a sister. I wasn’t looking for a person to occupy my time, I was looking for the person who helped me be the best person I could be and would stick by my side no matter what.

Mike and Brooks shared a look before Brooks cleared his throat and addressed me again, “We ran into each other that same week before she went back home. A month later we played the Penguins and she was there. We met up after the game and became good friends. When she got promoted to a better job here, I told her to move in with me to save up for a nice apartment.”

“I thought he was being his usual chivalrous self,” Meghan cut in while looking up at Brooks with a smile.

Brooks smirked, “When in reality I just wanted her all to myself and the way to do that was for her to live with me.”

“Wow,” I said. That surely was one of the better stories of a couple I have heard. I could tell that they had been friends for quite a while. They were absolutely crazy about each other, anyone could see that, but what I was really jealous of was the fact that they were completely at ease with each other. They didn’t feel the need to be all over each other in public in order to prove that they were together. They had complete trust in one another and their easy-going friendship paired with their feelings towards each other made them one of the best couples I had ever had the pleasure to meet. I wasn’t really sure how to follow that story up with a comment other than ‘wow.’ I mean jeez, my heart is melting at the cuteness of this couple.

“You never know who you’re going to fall for until its too late. If I had my way I would be with a Penguin,” Meghan to me with a small smile. Brooks looked down at her with narrow eyes, “But now I can’t imagine my life without him even if a Penguin proposed to me tomorrow.” Just when Brooks was smiling smugly she added, “But I still hope the Penguins kick Capital ass as long as Brooks does well.”

I let out what Morgan considered my evil laugh as I took in Brooks’ dejected expression. I was beginning to see why Brooks was so attached to Meghan, I was quite liking her myself. She was the kind of woman that would tell you straight but in the kindest way possible. She wasn’t exactly a sugar coater but at the same time, she wasn’t just a blunt person. She told you the truth in the nicest way possible and I really appreciated that. My mouth had no filter, I said what I thought without any consideration of how it might affect the person.

Then it hit me, what they were doing that is. The couple was trying to get me to be nicer to Mike. I now realized they were both shooting me the give-him-a-chance look while Mike stayed silently by my side. I rolled my eyes at how dumb I could be to not see what they were doing sooner. It did not make me think any less of Meghan and Brooks; actually, it made me think quite the opposite. They were just looking out for their friend and I could find no fault in that. There was only one way that I would listen to their advice, “So Meghan since you’re all buddy buddy with Mike and together with Brooks, does that mean you have grown to like Ovechkin too?” I asked with an innocent smile.

She let out a disgusted scoff, “He’s an ass. I stay as far away from him as possible.”

I let out a chuckle, I wanted to share that little tidbit with Morgan but I knew she’d wouldn’t appreciate it. Just because he was an asshole to everyone else doesn’t mean that he had to automatically be an ass to Morgan. Maybe she had something that other people didn’t have that would make him treat her right and with respect as well as the plain fact that he could not possibly be an asshole to everyone in his life. Maybe I should give both him and Mike a break and get to know them before I passed judgment on them. Whatever, I apparently had to swallow my pride and actually be nice to the Capitals for a change because they were people after all. I threw my hands up in exasperation, “Fine, fine. The subtle brain ninja-ing can stop now. Give me your phone Green.”

Mike dug into his pocket and pulled out his iPhone. He silently handed it over to me and I typed my name and phone number in. I sent a text to myself with his name in it. I smiled at the pair in front of me. “It was nice to meet you both. Can you take me to my hotel Green?”

Meghan fuddled around in her purse before she found a business card and a pen. She wrote something on the back before handing it to me. I turned it over and saw that Meghan had written her cell number on it. Meghan put her hand on mine as I hold the card in front of me, “Keep in touch. Maybe we could spend some time together.”

“I’d love to get to know you better,” I agreed. I hugged her enthusiastically which was a surprise since I wasn’t much of a touchy-feely person, but Meghan just seemed like the older sister I never had. She was just so kind! Though the hug with her beau was relatively awkward. Mike took my hand in his. He gently rubbed his thumb on the back of my hand in circles. He led me to his escalade. Like a true gentleman, he opened the car door for me. He got more brownie points, not that he knew it, for keeping his hold on my hand while I got in. The drive to the hotel was a comfortable silence and rather quick for D. C. traffic.

He put the car in park and shut off the car. He gave me a serious look and ordered me, “Stay put.” He got out of the car and shut the door behind him before walking around to my side of the car and opened the door. I slid so I was sitting sideways in the chair so I could slide out. While I was sliding out Mike put his hands on my waist so that my body slid all the way down his. On one hand, I could get behind getting to feel his muscles as I placed my hands on his biceps. On the other hand, it was totally unnecessary for him to feel the need to help me out of the car that much. A hand would have been sufficient.

I started to walk away with an awkward wave but he just walked beside me. “You really think I won’t make sure you get to your room safely?”

I rolled my eyes and stepped in front of him so I could face him properly. I put a hand on his chest, resisting the urge to cop a better feel of his pectoral muscle. It was honestly unfair how ripped he was. “I will text you when I am in my room and the door is locked. I’ll even wave out the window because we face the front.”

Mike shook his head and shrugged, “I don’t know what you want me to do. I’m trying to show you that I’ll treat you right.” He heaved out a sigh before he looked me in the eye again, “Can I ask you something?”

“You just did, but go ahead,” I snarked. I had a feeling that shit was about to get real in this conversation and I really wasn’t going to like it. I didn’t really like talking about my feelings and Mike here seemed to want me to announce them to the world twenty-four seven. I wasn’t a girly girl and Mike was going to have to learn that I didn’t just offer my affection or my feelings easily. He had to work a bit for them.

“Why did you like me before you met me? What attracted you to me?”

I shrugged, “You were good looking.” When you don’t know someone, the fact that they were hot was reason enough to like them, you didn’t really need much else.

“Maybe that’s some of it, but I know you would need more than that to like someone. You’re more calculated than that.”

I let out an angry huff. Was he this needy that he wanted to fish for compliments? Why was he so concerned with what I thought of him? He needed to get a new hobby that didn’t include antagonizing me. I couldn’t lie to him, he seemed to have some sneaky way about him that could tell when I was bullshitting him. God, he was annoying. He really just needed to leave me alone. “I thought you were sweet. You were a soft-spoken man that just seemed to radiate genuine kindness.”

He stepped even closer to me and looked down into my eyes. He had such a determined look in his brown eyes that I couldn’t look away even if I wanted to. His expression commanded attention and demanded that I listen to what he was trying to tell me. “Why can’t I have a similar first impression of you? Why can’t I say that based on my first impression, if proven correct, that I could never bear to be just a friend to you? How could you expect me to be just a friend to a beautiful, sarcastic, and witty woman? Why can’t we both be good judges of character and just move past it? Can’t we accept that somehow we already know the essence of each other and move past it?”

Damn. Again I was struck stupid. These stupid Capitals are having a bad effect on me. I was usually a quiet person with people I didn’t know, but this was different. I was completely speechless. When I didn’t know someone I just thought of what I wanted to tell them and not actually do it in case they took offense. I didn’t speak much in order to feel them out before I started talking to them. But no, now I didn’t even think of something to reply to that. I just didn’t know what to do with what was just said. It was like my brain just decided to shut off, what Mike had said was just too philosophical that my brain was just like, ‘I’m done, I’m out, I quit.’

As if he sensed that I had no come back for that, he sent me a small smile and continued, “I’ll be your friend if that’s all you’re willing to give me, but I will always want more with you.” He wrapped his strong arms around me and gathered me to him. I laid the side of my head against his chest and let out a content sigh when I heard the thump of his heart. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I wrapped my arms around his narrow waist. We stayed like that in a peaceful silence. Mike’s breathing and heart thumping helped me to relax and I soon found myself melting into his lean figure. And God did he smell good. He smelled like men’s Suave shampoo from his shower and body wash. He smelled completely wonderful and I really didn’t want to move out of his embrace, though I knew I had to in order to keep this strictly friends mentality. If I let him overwhelm me, then we wouldn’t have a voice of reason in our relationship anymore.

It took an inhuman amount of strength for me to tear myself away from Mike. I really didn’t want to break our embrace because just like his hand holding, he was a champ at giving hugs. I might have been the fact that Mike was exactly 11 inches taller than me (trust me I googled that shit after our first encounter) and he seemed to consume my entire form. Usually I hated the fact that everyone was so much taller than I was, but when Mike had me in his arms, it was rather nice. I didn’t know if he was really prepared to throw down for me, but just knowing that Mike was fully capable of defending my honor was pretty sexy. I was a violent person by nature, the idea of Mike fighting someone for me was appealing though I knew he would never get the chance to because I’d beat the shit out of the person first. I guess it was more me liking the idea that he could have my back in a tussle if I needed him to. Women looked for guys with muscle and I guess I was no different.

When I let go of him, I walked into the hotel without looking back even though it was extremely tough. I walked up the stairs instead of taking the elevator so that I could calm my racing heart and beat down my huge grin when I was thinking of the feel of Mike’s body wrapped around my much smaller one. When I reached my floor, I walked down the hall before sliding my magnetic key card into the slot of Morgan’s and my room before opening the door. I went in and walked over to the window. Before I moved the curtain away and waved to Mike, I sent him a text.

To: Michael Green
I died ;)

I used my arm to move one side of the drapes to one side and made eye contact with the brown-eyed hockey player. He soon found her window and kept a steady gaze on her as he leaned against the Escalade, arms crossed over his muscular chest. He only broke eye contact to fish his phone out of his pocket and to read the message I sent him. He looked back up and shook his head in mock disappointment of me before giving me a wave and walking to the driver’s side of the car. I watched him drive away before getting ready for bed and cuddling into the cushiony awesomeness that was my hotel bed.