She Screams in Silence

End of Chapter Twenty Four:

“Yeah. I want to be with you...more than anything.”

“Great. And if that’s the case, you can have this then,” he sat up, whipping out a small gift box from his coat pocket and setting it on the bed in front of her. He paused and added, “If you want it.”

“You got me a present?”

“Sort of.”

“‘Sort of’? What is it?” Felicity raised an eyebrow at the little white cardboard box, smaller than her palm.

“You could try opening it. That might be one way to see.”

She scowled at him, shaking her head and lifting the box’s lid. But upon revealing the contents, she dropped it like she’d been burned.

“Okay, ow,” Billie raised a brow at her reaction.

Felicity didn’t hear him. She was too busy gaping at the object that had rolled out of the box onto the mattress when she had let it go. It was a smaller box, though not nearly so mysterious. The box was black. And velvet.

Jewelry. Very particular jewelry.

Long rectangular boxes indicate necklaces or bracelets. Squat rectangles indicate earrings.

The one on the bed was square.

Official Start to Chapter Twenty Five...

Felicity could barely breathe.

“Is this...?” she stared at him wide-eyed, unable to finish.

He raised his eyes to the ceiling. “Seriously. Actually opening the box would answer a lot of your questions.”

Literally forcing herself to inhale and exhale, Felicity tentatively reached out for the little box, hesitating, as though it might snap her finger off if she touched it.

“It isn’t radioactive. Don’t worry,” Billie assured her dryly, picking it up himself and setting it on her knee. “Though then again, nothing says ‘I love you’ like nuclear waste.”

Gulping, she picked it up, tracing her fingertips over the velvet casing. She was probably overreacting. Earrings could certainly come in a square box, couldn’t they? Or maybe it wasn’t jewelry at all; it was just the only box he had on hand for whatever he was giving her. Though that would beg the question as to why he had a little velvet box lying around.

There was, of course, only one way to find out.

The lid had a small gold catch, and she popped it, pulling it open.

“Oh my God,” she whispered.

There, mounted in black silk padding, the object left no doubt in her mind as to Billie’s intentions. A brilliant, sparkling, round-cut diamond, well over a carat, was set within an intricate platinum band, small diamonds adorning the ring on either side. It was the most exquisite ring she had ever seen, perfectly elegant and crafted. It was a thousand times lovelier than that ridiculous one her mother had worn, too large to be anything but gaudy and ostentatious. It was absolutely breathtaking.

It made no sense whatsoever.

“Felicity,” Billie nudged her cautiously after a minute or so, “you’re doing it again. Not breathing, I mean. I think that’s kind of important, so if you could maybe inhale or something? Please?”

She gasped sharply, her lungs protesting from the lack of oxygen they had been receiving.

“I don’t understand...” she trailed off helplessly, nearly inaudible.

He cocked a brow. “Okay, well, since apparently no one’s clued you in on the practice, occasionally when two people kind of like each other, they do this thing called ‘marriage.’ It’s a ceremony. It’s very popular in many cultures. A lot of times it’s in a church. There’s cake involved. Crazy relatives you don’t know will give you toasters. And it’s often custom to mark the fact that people plan to do this in the near future with a ring. Rings, as you may know, are worn on your fingers.”

“Billie,” she held up a hand, cutting off his mocking speech. “I mean, I don’t understand all of this––you still wanting me, you wanting me to live with you, you wanting to...” she trailed off, her gaze dropping to the ring again. “I just...why...I mean...” she stared at him in utter confusion. “Billie, aren’t you even a little mad at me for leaving?”

“Mad?” he frowned. “I’m not mad.”

“But...but you should be!” she protested. “I left! I made you so unhappy, so miserable! I did it! It was my fault! Normal people would be a little angry! They wouldn’t propose!”

“Do you want me to be mad at you? I would think normal people wouldn’t want that.”

“No, of course I don’t! But hasn’t it occurred to you that maybe I deserve it? That I don’t deserve you? That I really don’t deserve this?” she gestured to the ring.

“Well, now, I’m just curious here. Humor me for a second, will you? You think I’m being crazy, because you think I’m making a mistake going anywhere near you and I should hate you, right?”

“Basically.”

He went on, “So, let’s just say, hypothetically, you didn’t have this enormous guilt complex. Without that, what would you have said?”

She blinked. “What are you talking about?”

“I said humor me.”

“Billie, are you an idiot? Do you even think for one moment that I’d say anything but yes if I hadn’t put you through so much pain like I did?”

A wide smile lit up his face. “So you’re saying yes?”

“Of course I’d say yes if I hadn’t––”

Billie didn’t let her finish. His mouth was on hers, his hands twined through her hair, pulling her against him. Briefly, Felicity let herself surrender to the heavenly moment, but it was not to last.

“Billie,” she pulled back, staring at him and hating the tears burning in her eyes, “I do not deserve––”

He cut her off, his hands sliding up to her face, “Stop. I don’t give a damn about what happened, so neither should you. You got that? Beating yourself up over something you can’t do anything about is ridiculous. Don’t bother. I love you and I want to be with you. I am miserable without you, so don’t go telling me if I’m smart, I’d stay far away from you. If that’s the case, I’d rather be an idiot. And that’s my decision. It’s one thing if you don’t feel the same way, but––”

“I do feel the same way,” she whispered.

He gave her a crooked grin, “So there’s no problem. Please stop trying to insist there is one.”

Felicity knew she ought not to back down so easily, knew that guilt he told her to forget about would still bite at her for years to come, but how was she supposed to resist that smile? Conscience-stricken though she may have been, it would take absolute insanity to say no to him when he was looking at her like that.

But saying yes was another matter entirely...

“So...?” he smiled.

“Before I give you an answer,” she hedged, holding up a hand, “well, now if I were to say yes––and this is strictly hypothetical, of course.”

“Of course,” Billie nodded, grinning broadly.

“So, hypothetically, if I were to say yes, I do have a couple...questions, I guess you could call them.”

“All right, shoot.”

“First off, you don’t think we’re rushing things at all?”

He raised a brow. “You think five years is rushing things?”

“Well, not when you put it that way. But technically, of those five years, we’ve only been together for, what, eight months worth?”

Billie made a face, shaking his head, “And technically, of those five years I’ve probably spent almost two of them asleep––well, maybe one with the insomnia, but whatever. Don’t be so picky.”

She scowled at him, “You’re more of a smart-ass than you used to be.”

“All part of the sex appeal––you want me...badly.”

She stifled a grin and then went on, “But really, I’m serious! It’s been four years. Theoretically, we’re not exactly the same people we were then. What if...what if we’re not quite compatible anymore?”

“Because we were such a likely pairing to begin with.”

Felicity paused for a few moments. “Is there some sort of sarcasm off-button on you somewhere? I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you, but you keep mocking me. It’s rude.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Billie shrugged. “But come on, you’re making it too easy. It’s too hard to resist when you give me such excellent ammunition.”

“Is it? I don’t think I’m being that ridiculous.”

He let out a sigh and then took her hand, “Fine. Look, you like me somewhat, right?”

“You could call it that.”

“And you have no urge to set me on fire or throw me off a building?”

“No more than usual.”

“So there you go. I think we’ll get along okay.”

“But what if it turns out that you don’t much care to be around me anymore?”

He gave her a withering look. “I’m not saying you haven’t changed at all since you were eighteen––if you hadn’t, that would be weird. But as bipolar opposite as you think you’ve become, I’ve got to tell you, you’re still...you. And if you hadn’t picked up on this, I like you. I mean, we might have a problem if you’ve become a paid assassin or you’re dealing heroin to children or something, but past that, I think we might be all right.”

“Oh,” Felicity’s gaze slid away. “I guess I shouldn’t tell you about my night job then.”

“Shit, you’ve become a drug lord, haven’t you? I knew this would happen.”

She rolled her eyes, “Okay there, Two Dollar Bill.”

Billie’s eyes widened, and he looked mortified, “Who told you about that?!”

“Mike––years ago. So, what, if I give you a couple bucks, are you going to give me a joint? Does it come pre-rolled?”

Now he was absolutely appalled. “You––you shouldn’t know things about joints! You’re...innocent! And no, I don’t sell them anymore! I don’t really think I need to!”

“For God’s sakes, calm down. I was just teasing you. And if it helps, I haven’t become a pothead. For your information, the only thing I’ve smoked in my life, was that one hacking puff on the joint that you gave me at that party of yours! So I really wouldn’t start on about my ‘innocence.’ You’ve been trying to corrupt me since Day One. You...corrupter.”

Billie grimaced, “I have been a very bad influence on you, haven’t I?”

“Yes,” she nodded, smiling, “you have.” She leaned in and kissed him quickly, “Thank you.”

Billie’s mouth curved into a lopsided grin, and he pulled her back, murmuring at her lips, “You little juvenile delinquent.” He made to kiss her, but then pulled back abruptly, grinning, “So now that you’ve sufficiently distracted me, back on our topic––anything else to take issue with?”

“Well...”

“Come on, come on,” he waved his hand, “I’m a roll right now. Give it to me.”

She hesitated before replying, “There’s only one more, I swear.”

“Go on.”

“You don’t think we’re still a bit young?”

Billie looked at her flatly. “I’m twenty-five. I’m not that young.”

“Okay, but...I’m not twenty-five.”

“Nor are you an infant.”

“Haha.”

He went on, “Besides that, it’s not as though I’m demanding we rush over to the courthouse tomorrow. It can wait a bit, if you’d like. I don’t know if you wanted to plan some sort of––”

Felicity cut him off, shaking her head, “What? Big wedding? Who would I even invite? I’m a little closed off, if you haven’t noticed. I don’t exactly have a giant pile of friends. And I’m not in contact with any of my family either. So unless you wanted a giant extravaganza...”

He grinned, “I want whatever makes you happy.”

“...That was kind of sappy, Billie.”

“Yes, it was. But it’s still true.”

“Well,” Felicity traced one of the down comforter’s seams, “––and this is still hypothetical, you realize––if we’re going to get married and we’re not going to make a big fuss about it, I don’t think I see the point in dragging it out.”

He blinked. “‘Dragging it out.’ You’re acting like it’s a punishment. Thanks.”

She smiled, “I’m sorry. You know what I mean. If I’m going to marry you, I want to do just that. I see no reason to spend months getting hysterical over flowers and the perfect shade of peach for napkins. That doesn’t matter to me. This,” she placed her hand on his chest, able to feel his heartbeat under her palm. “You’re all I want.”

Billie couldn’t help from breaking into another wide smile, “That was kind of sappy, Felicity.”

“Shut up,” she wacked his arm. “It’s still true.”

“Well, if that’s the case, we could go over to the courthouse right now then, if you want. Or Vegas. You want to do Vegas?”

She smiled, “You mean just elope? You don’t think it would be a little rude not to tell anyone? I mean, I’d like something pretty small, but we’re not under the gun or anything. You didn’t knock me up and my father isn’t wanting to kill you for destroying my virtue.”

Billie laughed, “Actually, I don’t know about that. He always seemed to be pretty testy as far I was concerned.”

“Oh, no, he loved you. I don’t know why you mistook that for unbridled rage.”

“Okay, so...you do want to wait a little bit, then?” Billie asked, looking a little confused.

“Ugh, no. I don’t want to wait. I just...I don’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings if we run off and don’t tell them until after the fact.”

“It isn’t about them,” Billie pointed out.

“True,” she nodded. “But you have got family and friends who care about you very much and––”

“We,” Billie corrected her. “Not just me. And like I said, I’ll do whatever you want. You want to go right now and do this, fantastic. You want to wait a little bit and invite some people, that’s great, too.”

“I don’t know,” Felicity shook her head, flustered. “This is the first time I’ve ever had to seriously consider something like this. I have no idea what you’re supposed to do!”

“You’re not supposed to do anything. You do what makes you happy. How many times do we have to go over this concept?”

“Okay, okay, fine! But, well, going with that, do you think Cat and Tre will get mad if we get married before them? I don’t want them to feel like we’re...stealing their thunder.”

Billie quirked a brow, “You think either of them are that hardcore about wedding etiquette?”

“You may have a point.”

He gave her a look, “All right, I have to ask––is this still all hypothetical?”

Felicity smiled shyly, “No.”

“Really?” his face lit up. “Are you serious? I don’t want to push you into this if you don’t want to––God, I’m doing that a lot today. It’s just...I know this is all sort of happening quickly, but I can’t help...I mean, you’re all I––”

“Yes, I am serious,” she interrupted him.

“Okay, okay, let me do this right,” Billie grinned excitedly, jumping off the bed and pulling her to her feet.

“Do what right?” she shook her head in confusion. “What are you––oh,” she breathed, watching him sink down on one knee, taking her hand. “Billie, I pretty much already said I’d––”

“Hush,” he cut her off. “I’m planning on only doing this once, so let me do it properly.”

“Okay, no more interruptions, I promise,” she replied, realizing she was ruining the moment.

He laughed briefly and then went on, “Okay, so...here’s the deal. I can’t promise things will always be perfect. I can’t promise we’ll never fight. I can’t promise that never will I, at some point or another, do something to annoy the hell out of you. But what I can––what I do promise is that I love you with all my heart and I will keep loving you every day until the day I die––and frankly, I don’t even think that would stop me. I will be there––always. I want to be with you. I want to be with you when we have kids, or one of us goes through a mid-life crisis, or when we’re really old and we spend the day watching Wheel of Fortune and looking around for our dentures. If you let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you as happy as you make me, to see you smile. You’re all I want. Felicity Bennet, will you marry me?”

Felicity felt her insides turn into warm, fuzzy mush. “Yes,” she smiled.

“I––oh crap, the ring. Hold on,” he scowled, reaching for the ring box still sitting on the bed while trying to maintain his balance on his knee. “So much for doing this right,” he grumbled.

“You’re doing a fabulous job,” she encouraged him. “I said yes, didn’t I?”

“This is true,” Billie nodded, grabbing the box and opening it, slipping the ring onto her third finger, the band cold against her skin. “And it fits!” he exclaimed triumphantly.

“See? You’re doing excellently.” She twisted her hand back and forth, letting the prisms sparkle in the light.

He grinned up at her, rising to his feet. Taking both her hands in his, he murmured, “So you’ll really marry me?”

“Yes, I’ll really marry you,” she whispered back.

He smiled, abruptly pulling her to him, wrapping his arms around her waist. This time around, there was no hesitation on Felicity’s part, and eagerly, she twined her arms around his neck, smiling into the kiss he pulled her into. In that moment, all doubts finally cast aside, she knew she had never been half as happy.

The irony of this little trip, of course, was not lost on her. So much for “just looking.” In less than an hour following her arrival, she had not only agreed to live in the house, but marry its owner.

Oh well.

Billie was the one to finally break the kiss minutes later, smirking at her, an evil gleam in his eyes.

“What? What are you––” Felicity never finished her question, as with a light shove to her shoulders, she toppled backwards onto the mattress, pinned by Billie, his lips returned to hers, his electrifying hands already slipping under the hem of her shirt.

“You have got to stop throwing me on your bed,” she muttered, grinning up at him.

“Never. I’d have nothing to live for.”