Don't Think I Can Fight This Anymore

Sarge -

Tess woke up. She says it was Lestrange. Lestrange was the one who attacked her.

I’m also appealing to the army for a kill on sight order.

Be on your guard.

-Hayes

~*~

“That doesn’t make any sense.” Trip finally said.

The three had sat in silence while Evelyn smoked her entire cigarette. It make her feel sick and woozy, but better at the same time.

“Why would Lestrange go into hiding for two years, and then come back and attack Tess?” Trip demanded, fumbling with his pack. “And then turn up in my apartment halfway around the world?”

“Maybe he’s trying to finish something.” Ian said, his face still cradled in his hands.

“War’s over, as everyone loves to remind me.” Evelyn said.

“All the evidence points to Lestrange being the one who killed Frank.” Ian mumbled.

Anger flashed in Trip’s eyes. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Because we only recently put all the pieces together, and neither of you needed it on your minds with everything that’s happened lately.”

“What pieces?”

“Tracy always called him the ‘hockey enforcer’. He’s the only one with that build who we never caught up with. And I’ve checked and rechecked all the files - no one else has admitted to that. No one under the imperius curse did it either.”

Evelyn slowly ground out her cigarette butt.

“He’s the only logical explanation. Why he’d go after Frank, I don’t know.”

Trip looked at Evelyn. “You’re quiet. What do you think?”

She looked up, and her eyes were hard. “I think it makes sense. He’d have enough clout to set a dementor on Hayes.”

Trip lit his cigarette and Ian shook his head. “Finch, that’s quite a leap.”
/
“You’ve been doubting me for three years. Maybe with this you’ll stop and listen.” Evelyn snapped. “We have to rethink everything that has happened to all of us. What if this is a vendetta? He killed Frank. He attacked Tess. What if he set the dementor on Hayes? What if he killed Quinn?”

“Look, Evs,” Trip sighed. “We all know Tracy was getting better but he easily could have taken a few steps backwards - “

“He was convinced he was being watched.” Evelyn remembered. “He wrote me, saying he was being watched, and I told him he probably wasn’t. Even if Lestrange was just stalking him, that’s enough for me to say he killed Quinn. And quite frankly, I don’t think that it’s at all possible that I end up in St Mungo’s with a cracked skull and Trip manages to get Lestrange tied up.”

“Fuck you, Evelyn.”

Ian stood and moved to the window.

“Let’s be real, Trip.” Evelyn said flatly. “I love you, and you’re a better spy than James Bond, but you couldn’t tie Lestrange to a chair if he handed you the rope.”

“He could have easily killed you, so why did he just injure you?”

“He’s taking what we love.” Ian said. “What we fight for.”

The other two stopped squabbling and turned to look at their former commander.

“If he’s behind all of this...Frank and Hayes were just normal war casualties. He went into hiding for all of the clean up work and got smart. He watched us move on with our lives. He watched what would hurt us most.”

Trip’s brow was furrowed. “Sarge?”

“Quinn was struggling to hold on. But he was doing better and we were proud of him for that. Taking his life, forcing him or otherwise...it would take everything from him. Tess and Colin had each other and the baby. A whole new part of their lives. He hurt her to take the baby away.”

Evelyn felt sick. And it wasn’t just from the cigarette.

“Trip, Evelyn was right. He let you take him. Because that’s been your mission for four years. And then he escaped, knowing it would drive you mad that you were that close to having him.”

“And me?” Evelyn asked hollowly. “What did he take from me?”

“No one believed you.” Ian said. “And I’m so sorry, Evelyn. I didn’t believe you. And now we’re all going to pay for that.”

Trip rubbed his temples. “Everyone close to us is in danger. Rodolphous wasn’t half as crazy as his wife but...I have this awful feeling that this is far from over.”

Ian and Trip started talking about what should be done, but Evelyn wasn’t paying attention. Was it that simple? He had taken her credibility from her, and that was all?

Everyone close to her was in danger. Her throat tightened as she thought of all the nightmares of her brother and Charlie and Trip and George and Sylvia. Hell, she could just see all the hands on Molly’s ingenious clock swinging around to ‘Mortal Peril’. She could keep George and Sylvia safe. Trip could, in spite of what she had said earlier, take care of himself. So could Daniel.

But Charlie. How would she keep Charlie safe in a war that he thought was over?

~*~

“One more.”

Trip groaned from the mat and looked at her upside down. She was already up and bouncing on her feet.

“Don’t you have a tea shop to run?”

“It’s Monday, stupid. Shop’s closed. Besides, shouldn’t you be back in Kuwait? Keeping an eye on the war preparations? Practicing baby making with the girl I’m not allowed to meet?”

Trip sat up and shook his head. “Just...give me a minute okay? And you will meet her. She’s getting reassigned to join me here.”

Evelyn stopped bouncing and lowered her fists. “Seriously?”

He reached for his water and shrugged as he drank.

“You’re staying here, in London.”

“It seems to make sense. Someone’s gotta watch your six.”

Evelyn smiled faintly, both at her friend moving to England and the phrase. The unit said that so much it was a position. Finch’s six. Keep an eye on the second in command, make sure she doesn’t lose her shit.

Then the smile faded. Trip was glad he had given her a reason to smile. She hadn’t had that recently. Even the letters from Charlie hadn’t made her smile lately. The lines in her face deepened with worry.

“Why are you getting reassigned?”

“I asked to liason with the auror department.” Trip said. “Coordinate the international effort to keep an eye on the muggle war. Sarah doesn’t like Kuwait much to begin with. She’s more than happy to ask for reassignment to the London branch of the bank.”

“Bank? I didn’t know Gringotts had branches.”

“She’s a muggle.” Evelyn must have looked surprised, because he added, “And no, she doesn’t know yet.”

“Well, you should probably tell her before she moves halfway around the world with you.”

Trip rolled his eyes. “I know, I know.”

She watched him stand. “You didn’t answer my question.”

“Yes I did.”

“No, you told me how you were moving here. Not why.”

Trip cracked his neck and jabbed his fists at her. “Same reason you’re here every night until nine at night, beating the shit out of a bag. Same reason you sleep with your wand under your pillow. Same reason you’re begging Charlie to be safe even if you won’t tell him why.”

She scowled. “You’ve been reading my mail.”

“No. I just know you. You’re human. You care about him, and you’ll do anything to keep him safe.” He reached forward and cupped her cheek with his gloved hand. “And it’s a good thing, Evelyn. If anyone deserves the whole normal life thing, it’s you.”

“You know what another good thing is?”

“What?”

She knocked away his hand, kicked his legs out from under him, and stepped over him, mimicking holding a wand to his throat.

“Your guard.”

He was wincing in pain. “Yeah. It is a good thing I’m moving up here.”

“Someone’s gotta watch your six.” she mocked. Then she straightened up and backed off. “Come on. One more round, Trip.”

“You’ll be the death of me.”

“All the boys say that.”

~*~

Evelyn stared absentmindedly at Charlie as they sat in the Leaky Cauldron. He had gotten back yesterday, after weeks of promising his mother he’d be home soon. Molly forced him to stay home the night before, releasing him into Evelyn’s care only tonight.

She studied the way the dim light in the pub made his hair shine gold and wondered just how far Lestrange would take everything. Far enough to tie Charlie up and torture him just because, like all her nightmares? Far enough to kill Charlie, just to make her miserable? He went after Tess and Colin’s unborn baby. Or maybe far enough to do nothing, and drive her crazy from lack of sleep.

Charlie put down his beer and glanced at her, then looked at her again. “You alright?”

Evelyn shook her head. “Yeah. Sorry.”

He turned in his bar stool to look at her full on. “I know you’re worried about Lestrange.”

She jumped at the name. “How did you know?”

“George told me.” He sighed. “Why didn’t you?”

“I didn’t want to worry you.” she said flatly.

“Evelyn, I can take care of myself. I can handle it. Besides, he’s after you, not me.”

“But he could go after you - “

“He’s already gotten you to crash your bike. Remember your Monster that my Dad put back together for you?”

“I was completely fine.”

“You apparated into a solid marble column and broke half your body.”

Evelyn sipped her beer and rolled her eyes.

Charlie waited until she put her drink down to take her hand. “Hey, look. It’s sweet that you’re worried. But you’re not the only fighter here. I can look after myself.”

She didn’t reply.

“I wanted to talk to you about something anyway. I think that maybe you should move to Romania with me.”

Evelyn blinked. “What?”

“You’re in danger here, Evelyn. You’re trying to fight a war that’s already over.”

“It’s not over until he’s gone.” she said shortly.

“He has no support, no power. He’s a madman who wants revenge. I just think it would be better if you moved in with me.”

“But...my shop…”

“You can open another shop, if that’s what you want. And honestly, Evelyn, we can’t do this,” he spread his hands to gesture to the both of them, “forever. When two people love each other they should be together.”

Evelyn was frozen. She couldn’t just leave. Not when the war wasn’t over. It was the final battle. Charlie couldn’t ask her to tap out. And if she did go, Lestrange would know exactly what would hurt her most. If he didn’t already.

She had already run to him once.

Charlie was still talking, but she had to think fast. How could she keep him safe? How could she show Lestrange that there was nothing he could take from her.

“But I don’t.” she said.

He stopped mid sentence, and looked confused. “Don’t what?”

“Love you.” She took a deep breath. “I don’t love you.”

Was she lying? Her eyes were crystals and her nails dug into her palms. But she looked straight up at him, and he couldn’t get a read.

Was he buying it? Did he suspect what she was trying to do? Would he just walk away, live his life, forget he ever met her? He searched her face, looking for the truth or the lie, but she wasn’t going to give him anything.

“Evelyn, you don’t - “

“I don’t love you.” she repeated.

And so it was there, all over the floor of the bar between them. Her staring up at him, him sitting in shock. The whole moment frozen with her words.

“Fine.”

The moment broke as he stood and dropped some coins on the bar. He started to walk away, but then stopped and looked at her.

“Let me know when your war is over, Evelyn.”

Evelyn turned back to the bar and waved Tom over.

“Alright, love?” he asked.

“I need firewhiskey.” she said. “I’m willing to pay for the bottle.”

Charlie apparated home and stormed through the kitchen, where Molly and Ginny were in the middle of an argument. The subject was quickly dropped when they saw the thunder on his face.

“Charlie! I thought you were staying at Evelyn - George’s tonight.” Molly said, leaping up.

“I’m not.” he said, tossing his cloak over a chair.

“Did you row?” Ginny asked. “What happened?”

“Nothing.” he said shortly. “I’m going to bed.”

They watched him pound up the stairs and then slam his bedroom door behind him. Arthur came into the kitchen looking at the ceiling.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

Molly sighed and shook her head. “Evelyn.”

~*~

It was late at night when George heard the singing. He rubbed his eyes and sat up, glancing at Sylvia next to him. She moved in her sleep, but her eyes stayed shut.

“I heard you driving in my car
Then in a frozen bar
I claimed I didn't care for you
But your verse got trapped inside my head
Over and over again
You played yourself to death in me”

George swung his legs out of bed and moved to the window, looking down on the street. A lone figure swayed, occasionally raising a bottle. There was the orange glow of a cigarette.

“I thought I'd drop you easily
But that was not to be
You burrowed like a summer tick
So you invade my sleep and confuse my dreams
Turn my nights to sleepless itch”

Evelyn.

George quickly pulled on a pair of pants and ran to the door, then down the steps of his flat. He threw open the door and Evelyn whipped around, wand aloft. But she stumbled and took a few sideways steps.

“Evs, come inside.” George sighed.

“George.” she giggled nervously, but didn’t lower her wand. “Ello, George.”

“Come on.” he coaxed. “You can sleep on the couch.”

She looked up the street at her flat, then stumbled towards him. “Just for a bit.”

He frowned as she sucked on her cigarette. “Thought you quit.”

“I did.” she tossed away the cigarette, and let him take her arm to steady her. She started to sing softly again, “Stuck on you 'till the end of time
I'm too tired to fight your rhyme
Stuck on you 'till the end of time
You've got me paralyzed”

George pulled her up the stairs and tried without success to take her bottle of firewhiskey away. “What are you doing out so late?” George asked, pushing his flat door open.

“Tom kicked me out.”

He gently pushed her towards the couch, letting her fall back on it. She sipped her bottle and he quietly shut the bedroom door. No use in waking Sylvia.

George sat next to his friend and tried to pry the bottle away again. She whined and pulled it back.

“Alright.” he sighed rubbing his eyes again and looking sideways at her. “Evs, you haven’t been this drunk in a while. Why are you drunk?”

She shut her eyes and shook her head. “Dumped Charlie.”

George was slightly taken aback. “You dumped Charlie? Why?”

“He said he loved me. I said I didn’t.”

“But you do love him. Everyone knows you love him.”

She nodded and drank more. “Yep. I love him.”

“So why the bloody hell would you tell him you didn’t?”

“Seemed like the thing to do at the time.”

George sighed at her half closed eyes. He grabbed the bottle again, and though she whined he finally was able to take it away from her.

“Lay down, idiot.” he sighed, standing up and moving her legs onto the couch.

“Are you mad at me?” she whispered.

“Why would I be mad?” he smiled. “He’s just my idiot brother who I actually thought might be gay. You’re my best friend, Evs. I know you had your reasons, however insane they might be.”

“I just want to keep him safe.” Tiny tears appeared in the corners of her eyes. “I don’t want him taken away.”

“Go to sleep.” George sighed. “We’ll talk in the morning.”