In Your Eyes
Chapter Seventeen
Dinner was a solemn affair. Dr. Pole ate slowly. Arella wasn’t sure how old he was, but he looked ancient. Her father asked him about his work and he happily answered. Meanwhile, Mathias hardly touched his food.
“You have to eat something,” she said in an undertone.
“I’m not hungry,” he muttered. “Excuse me, please,” he said to the table and left.
Dr. Pole watched him go sadly.
“Such a young man,” he said. “I hate having to deliver bad news.”
“We thank you for coming all the way out here, though,” Dorothy said.
“I wish there was more I could do for him,” Dr. Pole admitted. “But every study of medicine has proved inconclusive. I’m afraid he’s going to have a difficult life.”
“Not if I can help it,” Arella said, putting her fork down and hurrying after Mathias.
-
Dorothy watched her go and put her head in her hands.
“Perhaps I should go after them,” she said but the queen shook her head.
“Let them have some time together.”
-
Mathias was in his room, staring out the window. The snow had accumulated on the frame and he felt like screaming and hitting the window, making it all fall off. When Arella knocked, he didn’t answer so she pushed the door open slowly.
“Mathias?” she asked, shutting her door quietly. He remained silent and she approached him. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No,” he said harshly.
“But, it might make you-”
“I said no, Arella,” he snapped and she jumped at his tone. “Why are you here?”
“I thought you could use some company,” she whispered. “Someone to talk to.”
“Well, you were wrong.” She didn’t know what to say. “I never should have come here,” he spat. “Why did I talk my mother into bringing me along?”
Arella felt stung. “Do you regret everything?”
“Yes,” he said, finally looking at her and she gasped. “I don’t know why I even considered courting you.” She put a hand to her mouth. “What point is there? I’m constantly ill and you’re constantly depressed. That’s a terrible match.”
“Mathias,” she said, her voice trembling as tears filled her eyes.
“Just go,” he snapped but she didn’t move, thinking it was some cruel joke. “I said go!”
She jumped and left, slamming the door behind her. She ran to her room, crying.
--
Mathias glared at the closed door, his chest heaving. As soon as the door shut, though, he had regretted what he said. He fell to his knees, sobbing.
“What have I done?” he groaned and the world went black.
-
When he woke up, he was still on his bedroom floor, meaning no one had found him. He stumbled to his feet and down the hall to the washroom where he threw up. He stopped by Arella’s room on the way back and heard her sobbing. He wanted to knock on the door but left, shutting his eyes as he did so.
He got into bed, ignoring his mother when she came to check on him. He couldn’t sleep at all that night. All he could think about was what Dr. Pole had said. And the pain he had just inflicted on Arella. He cried into his pillow, wishing he could rewind time and stop himself from saying those hateful words.
Arella wasn’t at breakfast but the queen arrived late. She looked furious and he knew she had visited Arella.
“What were you thinking?” she snapped suddenly and the king blinked.
“Sweetheart,” he started but she kept glaring at Mathias.
“I don’t know,” he mumbled, hanging his head in shame. “I was upset.”
“And you took it out on her,” the queen finished angrily. “You have no idea the damage you’ve caused.”
“What are you talking about?” the king asked.
“You better find a way to make it up to her,” the queen continued. “If you don’t, you’ll be out of here as soon as the snow melts.”
He couldn’t stand it any longer and left the table, leaving the queen to tell the king and his mother what had happened. He paused outside of Arella’s door and knocked.
No answer.
He knocked again but she didn’t come to the door.
“Please, Arella,” he said through the door. “Let me in.” He took a deep breath and opened the door. “Look, Arella, I-”
But Arella wasn’t in there. He frowned and turned to the guard. “Where is she?”
“What do you mean?” he asked and Mathias pushed the door open wider.
The guard swore under his breath.
“You mean you weren’t watching!?” Mathias yelled.
Without waiting for a response, he ran to his room and threw on his cloak. The guard went running to the dining hall as he tried to think of where she had gone. He hurried out to the stables.
“Where did she go?” he asked the stable hand.
“I don’t know, sir. She just said she fancied a ride.”
“And you let her go alone!?”
The stable hand looked at him bemusedly. “She said the guard would catch up with her, sir.”
“Saddle me a horse,” he demanded and the stable hand quickly did as he said.
He mounted the steed and urged it quickly into the forest. He kept his eyes on the ground, following the tracks left by her horse. They were starting to get covered with the new snow and he got nervous. What if he lost her trail and she froze out here?
But she had gone to the lake and he dug his heels into the horse, making him run as fast as he could. There he found her horse tied up to a tree, pushing snow around to find something to graze. She sat at the foot of the hill and he approached her slowly.
“You have to eat something,” she said in an undertone.
“I’m not hungry,” he muttered. “Excuse me, please,” he said to the table and left.
Dr. Pole watched him go sadly.
“Such a young man,” he said. “I hate having to deliver bad news.”
“We thank you for coming all the way out here, though,” Dorothy said.
“I wish there was more I could do for him,” Dr. Pole admitted. “But every study of medicine has proved inconclusive. I’m afraid he’s going to have a difficult life.”
“Not if I can help it,” Arella said, putting her fork down and hurrying after Mathias.
-
Dorothy watched her go and put her head in her hands.
“Perhaps I should go after them,” she said but the queen shook her head.
“Let them have some time together.”
-
Mathias was in his room, staring out the window. The snow had accumulated on the frame and he felt like screaming and hitting the window, making it all fall off. When Arella knocked, he didn’t answer so she pushed the door open slowly.
“Mathias?” she asked, shutting her door quietly. He remained silent and she approached him. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No,” he said harshly.
“But, it might make you-”
“I said no, Arella,” he snapped and she jumped at his tone. “Why are you here?”
“I thought you could use some company,” she whispered. “Someone to talk to.”
“Well, you were wrong.” She didn’t know what to say. “I never should have come here,” he spat. “Why did I talk my mother into bringing me along?”
Arella felt stung. “Do you regret everything?”
“Yes,” he said, finally looking at her and she gasped. “I don’t know why I even considered courting you.” She put a hand to her mouth. “What point is there? I’m constantly ill and you’re constantly depressed. That’s a terrible match.”
“Mathias,” she said, her voice trembling as tears filled her eyes.
“Just go,” he snapped but she didn’t move, thinking it was some cruel joke. “I said go!”
She jumped and left, slamming the door behind her. She ran to her room, crying.
--
Mathias glared at the closed door, his chest heaving. As soon as the door shut, though, he had regretted what he said. He fell to his knees, sobbing.
“What have I done?” he groaned and the world went black.
-
When he woke up, he was still on his bedroom floor, meaning no one had found him. He stumbled to his feet and down the hall to the washroom where he threw up. He stopped by Arella’s room on the way back and heard her sobbing. He wanted to knock on the door but left, shutting his eyes as he did so.
He got into bed, ignoring his mother when she came to check on him. He couldn’t sleep at all that night. All he could think about was what Dr. Pole had said. And the pain he had just inflicted on Arella. He cried into his pillow, wishing he could rewind time and stop himself from saying those hateful words.
Arella wasn’t at breakfast but the queen arrived late. She looked furious and he knew she had visited Arella.
“What were you thinking?” she snapped suddenly and the king blinked.
“Sweetheart,” he started but she kept glaring at Mathias.
“I don’t know,” he mumbled, hanging his head in shame. “I was upset.”
“And you took it out on her,” the queen finished angrily. “You have no idea the damage you’ve caused.”
“What are you talking about?” the king asked.
“You better find a way to make it up to her,” the queen continued. “If you don’t, you’ll be out of here as soon as the snow melts.”
He couldn’t stand it any longer and left the table, leaving the queen to tell the king and his mother what had happened. He paused outside of Arella’s door and knocked.
No answer.
He knocked again but she didn’t come to the door.
“Please, Arella,” he said through the door. “Let me in.” He took a deep breath and opened the door. “Look, Arella, I-”
But Arella wasn’t in there. He frowned and turned to the guard. “Where is she?”
“What do you mean?” he asked and Mathias pushed the door open wider.
The guard swore under his breath.
“You mean you weren’t watching!?” Mathias yelled.
Without waiting for a response, he ran to his room and threw on his cloak. The guard went running to the dining hall as he tried to think of where she had gone. He hurried out to the stables.
“Where did she go?” he asked the stable hand.
“I don’t know, sir. She just said she fancied a ride.”
“And you let her go alone!?”
The stable hand looked at him bemusedly. “She said the guard would catch up with her, sir.”
“Saddle me a horse,” he demanded and the stable hand quickly did as he said.
He mounted the steed and urged it quickly into the forest. He kept his eyes on the ground, following the tracks left by her horse. They were starting to get covered with the new snow and he got nervous. What if he lost her trail and she froze out here?
But she had gone to the lake and he dug his heels into the horse, making him run as fast as he could. There he found her horse tied up to a tree, pushing snow around to find something to graze. She sat at the foot of the hill and he approached her slowly.