Pull Me In

Zack was never gentle when he came to pay his little “visits”. They were always rough, violent, and left me bleeding in the small bathroom once he was gone. He would get creative with positions and things that were used to hurt me, he would always tie my hands and cover my mouth so no one could hear me scream. The silk would do more damage to my wrists than his grip ever had. I would have to hide the bruises from everyone, it was easy in the beginning, there weren't many to hide. As he came more often it got harder, it didn't end with just bruises though, there would be cuts. I had thrown out my sheets before anyone could see the blood on it, it would be too hard to explain. The girls would always look at me strangely when I wore long sleeves and pants in the summer, the heat would be unbearable, but I couldn't tell them. I couldn't tell anyone. I just wanted to be free from all this pain.

~~~~~~~~

“There you are” I flinched at the voice that floated into my room. I wasn't expecting Zack for at least another week, he had a business trip he had to go to, and wasn't supposed to be back yet.
“Aww is the little baby scared of me?” Zack smirked darkly and walked over slowly, he wore the same suit as when he had first stepped foot in my room.

The room was thick with tension, I could barely look at him without fear racing hot through my veins. This man was terrifying in every sense of the word.

“Get up, and get dressed, we're going out” I couldn't help but perk up at that, Zack never took me out, he would always just fuck me til I was nearing passing out and leave without another word.
“Yes sir” I stood and grabbed clothes from the small closet that was right next to the bathroom, the pain from the last visit only a slight burn now.
“Oh no, you won't be wearing those clothes my baby boy” Zack clapped his hands together and called in one of the guards who was carrying a long black bag, I didn't want to wear anything he had bought for me.
“Here you are sir” The guard stood and glared at me as he laid down the bag. I really didn't want to be on his bad side, especially since his boss was the one fucking me constantly.
“Thank you Anthony, you may leave while Brian gets dressed” Zack didn't even turn to look at the man, his eyes locked on me.

The guard left and slammed the door with a loud bang, I couldn't help the flinch.

“Well? Aren't you going to get dressed so we can leave?” Zack's smirk was gone, a frown was set on his face as he stared at me.
“Yes sir” I picked up the bag and unzipped it, the suit inside was magnificent. I couldn't imagine the cost.

Before I could give the thought any time I began to get dressed, you never made Zack wait, never. Once the suit jacket was on and buttoned, and a pair of very expensive looking dress shoes were on my feet I was being rushed out of my room. His arm tight around my waist. I began to wonder where he was taking me, and if I was going to be safe, or if this was the last time I would see that brothel.

“Now where is he, we're going to be late” Zack's grip tightened as he scanned the street, he didn't look happy at all anymore.
“He's here sir, would you like me to take him out back?” The guard leaned down closer to Zack, his eyes scanning the limo that pulled up. Jesus this guy had to be loaded.
“No, that won't be necessary, just remember to follow the limo” The other guard opened the door to let Zack and I inside, it was spacious and nice, but it didn't take away any of the fear I had.
“We'll be going to a clients party, I want you to be on your best behavior” Zack's eyes were glaring holes into the side of my head as we headed off.
“Yes sir” I nodded my head slightly and swallowed, this wasn't going to end well.

He smiled once again and slipped his arm around my waist, his mood swings were always changing, one minute he would be happy and the next he'd be ready to kill someone. Of course I never did find out what he did for a living, I was always too afraid to ask. He was probably a mob boss, killing people that didn't pay him in time, could see it now.

“Just park right here, they're expecting us” Zack called to the driver as he stopped, my heart began to hammer in my chest, this was it, I could either make a good impression or piss Zack off beyond repair.

The limo door was opened by what seemed to be someone's butler, they were gesturing us towards the mansion like home. This place was incredible, I wouldn't fit in at all. As if that was my biggest worry right now, pfft. Zack would most likely drop me off at the brothel once the party was over, and he got what he wanted from me. Inside the large home was even more beautiful than the outside, chandeliers hung from the ceiling, the people walking around were dressed in extravagant clothing. I felt so minuscule at that moment, why would Zack bring a hooker to a place like this?

“Matt! It's been so long” Zack abandon my side in haste to go find the person whose name he yelled, I stayed frozen in my spot, afraid I'd become lost in the mansion.
“Well, well, if it isn't Zach Baker, where have you been?” Matt's voice sounded so familiar, I wonder if he ever visited the brothel before.
“I've been traveling, you know how work is” Zack's signature smirk stretched across his lips, so this man knew something I didn't.
“Yes, I do” Matt glanced over at where I stood and raised a brow.
“Oh, let me introduce you” Zack walked over and roughly grabbed my arm, I could see the fire in his eyes and I knew that meant not to mess around.
“He's got looks, that's for sure” Matt sipped the drink that was in his hand and cleared his throat.
“Julie told me about him, said he was a feisty one in bed, of course I tamed him right away” Zack chuckled and slipped his arm around my waist, I could feel Matt undressing me with his eyes. I didn't like it.
“You're still going to that whore house? All of them have diseases” Matt grimaced and finished the rest of his drink. I wanted to curl up in a hole and hide forever.
“She only refers me to the new ones, I don't go there for the older women” Zack glared at Matt and tightened his grip. I couldn't get between them, I wasn't even supposed to be here.
“Did you at least get him tested?” Matt handed his glass to a server that was carrying a tray of hors d'oeuvres, whispering for him to bring three more.
“Do you think I'm that much of an idiot?” Zack spat, his eyes narrowing as he stared Matt down.
“She's lied to you before, why wouldn't she do it again?” Matt's eyes were hard as stone, if anyone had walked by they'd think a staring contest was going on.
“I had him tested, he's clean of everything” I couldn't help a soft squeak that passed my lips as Zack's hand rested on my ass, I was still sore.

Matt huffed and walked off into the party, the crowd swallowed him as he disappeared. I refused to look at Zack, he was already pissed off from the conversation with Matt, I didn't need to make it worse.

“Zack?” Another voice came from behind us, all I could gauge from his reaction was that he seemed pleased with the person.
“Holy shit, I haven't seen you in years short shit” Zack laughed and turned to hug the person, I didn't want as awkward as an introduction as before.
“Four years too long” The man, Johnny, patted his back and pulled back with a smile, his eyes instantly locking onto me.
“Did big bad Zack Baker finally settle down?” Johnny's face lit up with a smile, if he only knew.
“I may have, it'll be six months in a week” I turned my head to look at Zack shocked, he was keeping tabs on how long he was hurting me? Jesus Christ that's sadistic.
“You ever go back to see Julie? I just saw her a few days ago, had the worst sex I've had in a while” He shook his head and sighed, I really hoped Zack didn't tell him the truth.
“Haven't been there in forever, how'd the girls look?” Zack quickly covered his tracks, just hoped he wouldn't run into Matt and find out the truth now.
“Not worth it at all, granted the last time I was there the guy overdosed on something before we could even get down to it” Oh my god, it was him! He killed Eric!
“Brian? Is something wrong?” I could hear the concern in Zack's voice, I hadn't realized I had stopped breathing until then. Shit.
“Yes, I'm alright” I had to refrain from calling him sir, his friends would find it weird.
“Why don't you go get a drink and mingle?” Zack smiled and kissed my cheek softly, I felt the blood run to my face quickly.

I nodded and headed off to find the bar, he probably wanted to talk to Johnny without me there so I didn't look too suspicious. I kept my head down as I walked, it felt as if everyone was staring at me. Did they know about Zack? Did they know about who he truly was? Maybe, he tended to keep every aspect of his life hidden away from me.

“Brian” I jumped and turned to face Zack, he was absolutely fuming. What did I do?
“Yes?” I asked softly, I didn't want to piss him off even more than I already had.
“We're leaving” He grabbed my wrist and half walked, half dragged me from the mansion.

I caught up with him and kept my mouth closed, it was never better to ask Zack questions when he was angry, it only ended in pain. He shoved me into the limo and climbed in quickly, yelling at the driver to leave. I righted myself before I spared a glance Zack. His hands were clenched into fists at his side, something went terribly wrong at that party. I noticed that we weren't headed to the brothel, we weren't even headed back into town at all.

“Umm, sir, where are we going?” I tried not to sound scared, even if my brain was screaming at me to run the moment I got out of the limo.
“My home, I will not be made a mockery of our group just because you're a whore” Zack's words cut into my skin like knives, he didn't need to keep me around if he only saw me as an object.

I kept my head down and twisted my fingers into knots, I couldn't get close to Zack, he was a horrible person who did horrible things to people. Except there was something about him that I liked, and that scared me beyond belief. His friends all knew me as a whore, and that's all he would see me as, why couldn't I grasp that though? He was the only contact I'd had in months, whether it was affectionate or not, he was the only one willing to touch me. The thought caused me to grimace, it left a sour taste in my mouth. I was a whore that no one would ever want, a filthy, disgusting, waste of space. Why hadn't I just stayed on that street corner and left to die? At least I would be at peace, instead of stuck with someone who only used me for his own sick pleasure, I sighed. Maybe he would kill me when he got tired of me, I could finally see my parents again. God I missed them so much.

“Brian?” Zack spoke softly, I couldn't fathom why he was being so gentle right now.
“Yes sir?” My voice was thick, as if I had been crying.
“We're here, would you like to come inside?” He held his hand out for me to take, granted I wanted to go back to the brothel where I felt more at home. Somewhere I didn't feel like an alien. It was my home, and the girls were my family.
“Yes, sir” I gently grabbed his hand and slid from the limo, his home surprised me. It wasn't outlandish as I would expect, it was very, simple.

It was a two story home, a white picket fence surrounding the property, a garage attached to the side, the color a deep green. Sort of like Zack's eyes. It reminded me of my old house, the one I grew up in, except this wasn't that house. This was the man who was torturing me, this was where he resided. He must've liked to lay low and keep a low profile as to not attract attention. The limo driver, body guards, did they leave when he was home by himself? Did he have a maid that cleaned up his messes?

“Come inside, the neighbors are staring” Zack pulled a small set of keys from his pocket and headed to the side door, I hadn't even noticed in in my daze. I followed behind him quickly, I wasn't familiar with the area he lived in, it was very countryside.

“I'm sorry for the mess, I haven't been home much lately” I was taken aback by how he was talking to me, where was the Zack that put a gun to my head while he fucked me into my mattress?
“What's going on? I don't like this” I stood by the closed door, my eyes focused solely on Zack.
“I'll explain that tomorrow, you should get some sleep” Zack's shoulders slumped as he ascended the stairs, a defeated look crossing his features.

I had more questions than answers now, this wasn't the man I knew at all, this was a completely different side to him. I couldn't sleep knowing he would be right there, hell I couldn't move from my spot in the living room. What was going on?

~~~~~~~~~~

Things between Zack and I became very tense once I moved into his home, well I wasn't exactly willing to move in, but since I had no choice I made the best of it. I had tried to talk to him about what happened at the party, but he would shut down and leave before I got the chance. He was always awake before I was, either out jogging on the beach, or cooking breakfast, which surprised me. His cooking was always so delicious, why would he go out all the time if he knew how to make so many dishes at home? It must've been better for him to eat out, he seemed to live alone, and cooking for one person wasn't always easy. I wondered if he ever got lonely, living by himself all the time.

“I have to go out of town for a couple weeks, you'll have the house to yourself” Zack was absentmindedly pushing his food around on his plate, his eyes not leaving the plate once.
“Oh, okay, where are you going?” I was a tiny bit afraid to ask, especially since Zack tended to snap whenever I asked about his work life.
“I'm going to New York, it's nothing to worry about” His tone caught me off guard, he sounded upset, he must not like traveling.

I nodded and finished the rest of my breakfast, I didn't want to ponder the thought too much, if Zack wanted to talk to me he would.

The rest of our day was very uneventful, Zack did some grocery shopping while I cleaned as much of the house as I could. I didn't want him to feel even worse for having a dirty house, it wasn't something that was unnatural or anything. He was a busy person, it was understandable why his house wouldn't be pristine, especially since he was living alone. He decided to head to bed before 10, which was very unusual for him. I bid him a goodnight and relaxed into the couch. There wasn't much too watch so I decided to call it a night myself, even if it was only 10:45. After I had brushed my teeth and shut off all the lights I headed down to the room Zack had me staying in. Except something caught my eye, or well someone caught my eye. Zack was lying on his side, his back facing the door, his shoulders shaking slightly. He was, crying? I opened the door carefully, listening further.

“You're a worthless piece of shit Baker, just let him fucking leave” Zack spat angrily at himself, tears running in rivers down his cheeks.
“You deserve to die alone, and that's exactly what's going to happen to you” Sobs wracked his body as he curled tighter into himself. It was painful to watch, even after the torture and grueling pain he had put me through, it wasn't pleasant to watch him tear himself apart.
“I should just end it now, I have the gun” Zack ground out, gripping the sheet tighter.
“Write him in the will so he can have the funds at least, get out of that shithole brothel for good” He sniffed softly and rolled onto his stomach, hugging the pillow tightly.

I stepped away from the doorway and headed down to my room, guilt tearing my stomach apart. I couldn't comfort him, that would give away that I had been spying on him. The scene replayed over in my head until I had slipped into a nightmare induced sleep. They were all about Zack and I, except I wasn't the one being hurt, Zack was. And that scared me, I couldn't develop feelings for my abuser, I couldn't be another one of those people. The ones who stayed with their abuser and it ultimately end in their death. I couldn't do that, I wouldn't do that. Even if I was falling in love with him.