Hospital Beds and Memories

“Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday, dear Isle. Happy Birthday to you!”

I opened my eyes slowly and stretched so that I could see where the singing was coming from, the sight before me making me grin widely. Jack had entered the bedroom and was standing next to the bed, holding a cupcake with a candle on a plate in one hand and of course, his phone was blatantly recording everything in the other. This was the best birthday surprise I'd ever had… or that I could remember, anyway. For my last birthday I had just come out of the hospital and I was still getting very used to my new life. As for the other birthdays I remembered, well they were from when I was a kid and all I cared about then, as any other kid would, were the gifts. But right now, getting surprised from Jack like that...I loved it. It was better than any gift in the entire world.

“I love you.” Jack smiled after he finished singing, handing me the cupcake.

I simpered coyly and tried getting rid of all my hair that had fallen in my face. “I love you too.” Immediately after hearing that, Jack leaned all the way down and lightly planted his lips against mine. I couldn’t help but grin while he pulled away again. “Thank you.”

He stopped recording and I already knew he was putting it on his snapchat story. Living with Jack meant you had to deal with things like that, no acceptions. But, hey, I didn’t mind watching thismoment back as soon as I opened my phone.

“So,” Jack jumped back in bed, our duvet having already long found it’s way to the floor. “I have the whole day planned out. There may or may not be some gifts downstairs and some more cupcakes your mom baked for us--and before you ask, yes, it’s what I went to pick up yesterday. After that we are going to go out and have brunch on a boat.”

“A boat!” I exclaimed, my eyes going wide, while I put the cupcake on the bedside table for me to eat later without getting crumbs in the bed.

“Yes, you don’t mind them do you?” he started rethinking the entire thing he had planned for my birthday.

“No, I like them, don’t worry.” I sat up more so I could look down at him, running my fingers through his unsettled hair. “'m just surprised with your oh-so-romantic gesture.”

“Ok, good.” He sighed in relief and took my hand out of his hair so he could place a soft kiss on it. “I’ve been planning this for so long now...you don’t know how difficult it was to keep it from you.”

“You forgot about one thing though,” I pouted, trying to get him to freak out first.

And it seemed to work, because he was racking his brain to figure out what it was. “What! What is it?”

“How long do we have before we leave?” I asked before commencing my plan.

Jack checked the digital clock he had next to his side of the bed. “Two hours, why?”

I didn’t reply with words, and instead smirked before sitting up completely and shuffling over to him more. He asked me again what I was doing, but I just spun myself around so I was now straddling him. Resting one of my hands on his chest, I let myself move forward, causing him to raise his eyebrows, knowing exactly what was about to happen. When our lips touched and his hands traveled to my hips, I could feel his heartbeat speeding up. It was nice to know he did not only have that effect on me, but I had it on him as well. Soon after his hands traveled underneath my shirt, it came off, leaving me half naked and Jack grinning with excitement.

---

After the certain activities we did, we took a nice long shower together. And I actually mean just a shower, no other business went on in there. To say it very bluntly, we had sex, then after establishing we were very sticky and sweaty, we decided to take a shower. Simple as that. After that, the dreaded outfit choosing had to happen. Jack told me to dress nicely, but not too nicely, which just left me confused. I didn’t know what that meant! So, I just settled on something I knew Jack would like. I mean, a mini skirt and a crop top that looked like a dress when a belt was added would be fine, right? Well, Jack didn’t seem to complain when I joined him downstairs.

“Ok, so this gift will probably confuse you, but I’ll explain it.” He handed me something that felt pretty heavy but not too heavy, making me wonder what it was. Luckily I didn’t have to wait long, because Jack pushed me to open it -- it was like he was more excited for it that I was. When the wrapping paper came off, I was indeed confused. I was holding two boxes, one with a black point and shoot camera, and one that contained a similar camera, but in a brownish green color. This was definitely confusing. Why would I need two point and shoot cameras.

“Care to explain?” I frowned after waiting a while for Jack to clarify the use of these cameras, but not getting anything out of him.

“Ok, so,” he took one of the boxes, very excited to tell me his plan, “I was thinking we could start a youtube channel together. Now, before you ask why, I’ll explain. Well, since I’m gone on tour so often, I thought this would be another way to keep contact with each other, to show specific highlights from our day. And we can start today! Oh, and the kids will also probably like it, because we used to do updates like that ages ago, but we stopped. So it will be fun.”

“Umm, ok,” I looked at him skeptically. “I’m not against the idea or anything, but do you even know how to edit?”

“No, but I’m guessing you do.” He stated like it was very obvious.

“Well, yeah, but-”

“Exactly! It will be fun! You can work on it during those long boring hospital visits, if you have enough energy. And I’ll be able to see your face and hear your voice more clearly than through FaceTime when I’m on tour. If it doesn’t work out, we can always stop.” He continued to try convincing me.

“And there’s no legal problems?” I double checked before I agreed to anything. “Like with a contract or something stating you can’t post your own things unless checked with management, or it has to be on their channel?”

“That’s why we love hopeless, we can actually do our own things.”

“Ok, fine,” I agreed to his whole plan, before realizing another thing that could go wrong, “but you do know I’ll probably get a lot of hate again, right?”

“That’s how I actually came to this idea. I wanted to make a video to address it all, but then I thought of how stupid it would be to only have one video when we can document so many more things!” Jack continued to elaborate his amazing plan that was supposed to make everything better.

“Ok, but I’m taking the brown one!”

We proceeded to open both of the boxes and charge the cameras before we left the house and got in the car. Of course Blink-182 was blasting through the speakers and of course Jack was singing along, that was just how it worked. So, since Jack told me to get as much footage as possible, that we could sort it all out later, I recorded him singing. It was funny, so why not? However, when he realised what I was doing, he suddenly stopped and started laughing. Luckily, he didn’t get mad, there were so many people that would get so angry in situations like this. The rest of the car ride, Jack was afraid to open his mouth again.

When we finally found a parking spot in the busy city, we still had to walk a pretty long way to the harbour. The sun was beaming down on us, and my hand was most likely sweating profusely in Jack’s grip, but he didn’t seem to mind. Over time he had gotten used to the fact that my hands were basically always clammy, which I was happy about. I had so many bad stories about things that would happen when I was still a child, you could say I was traumatized. However, the sun was so bright and so warm already, and that didn’t really go well with the fact that I had had chemo the day before. I suddenly stopped in my tracks and quickly reached into my bag, hoping I wasn’t too late. With no water around, I had to swallow the pills dry, leaving a horrible taste in my mouth.

“Is everything ok?” Jack asked worriedly when he realised our fingers were no longer intertwined and I wasn’t walking next to him.

“Yeah,” I nodded and went to hold his hand again, “just a bit nauseous. I hope I took the medication on time, or I might have to fake seasickness.”

He continued walking with me “Are you sure you’ll be fine on a boat feeling like that?”

“Yeah, I already feel a bit better.” I smiled up at him, causing him to believe me.

So...that was a lie. I didn’t feel any better yet, if anything I was starting to feel worse. But I wasn’t going to ruin the whole day Jack had planned out specially for my birthday. I hadn’t had any side effects yet, so I wasn’t going to let them get me on the one day I didn’t want them. This was my day, and Jack was here with me. There was no way some stupid cancer killing thing was going to get me now. Any day but today.

I managed to keep it down the entire time, but the feeling never fully subsided. All I tried to do was focus on Jack and everything he had done for me. We first had brunch, but I wasn’t able to eat a lot. However, it had already been an ongoing thing, so it didn’t worry Jack, and he decided it was a good opportunity to eat whatever I had left over. That boy could eat like it was nobody’s business.

After that, we went up on the deck and sat down. The wind was rushing through my hair, making it all messy and tangled, but it felt amazing. Jack had wrapped his arm around me and I had pulled me knees up to my chest to get more comfortable. The buildings looked so tall and graceful from so far away, and the water was sparkling and rippling as the boat rushed along it. Everything about it was magical.

There were many other people on this boat, but Jack and I didn’t care. So what we would occasionally show some PDA? So what that Jack would shout out random stuff? It was just how we were. But all of this only reminded me of how all of this could end one day. I didn’t want that, of course. I wanted to have so many more experiences and memories with Jack, and there was no way I was ready to leave this all behind. With that goal as my strength, I knew I was going to fight this with every ounce of my being. Soon I would find out whether or not I made any progress, and if all went to plan, everything would be better. I just had to make sure everything would be.

Jack, however, noticed my mood had changed. I was not smiling as much anymore, instead I was staring off at the buildings, not really looking around at much else. Realizing my less than stellar mood, he planted a soft kiss on my temple before asking me what was wrong. Like he had told me before, he knew exactly when I was in deep thought since I ‘always had that look on my face’. But I never got to answer him. The ringing of my phone cut of any conversation that we could have been having. As soon as I saw my brother’s name at the top of my screen in big bold letters, I knew exactly what was going to happen and put the phone on speaker.

“Happy Birthday!” He screamed enthusiastically, turning my frown back into the smile that had been present not that long before.

Knowing how our routine normally went, I giggled it back, thinking about the one time he had a weird voice crack doing that when we were thirteen years old. “Happy birthday!”

“Woah! It’s your birthday too?!” Cam added. We started this when we were 12, when our sarcastic jokes had just started, and we were still really bad at them.

“No way!” I exclaimed, gasping louder than I should have in a public place like this. “It’s mine too!”

“Ok, bye.” I could just hear the smile in Cameron’s voice. Just before I hit the end call button I made sure to say bye back.

When I had put my phone away, I saw Jack smirking at me. “You guys are so weird.”

“That is very true,” I cuddled back closely into his side, making him wrap his arm tighter around me to keep me warm, “but you and I aren’t very normal together either.”

“You are definitely not wrong about that,” he chuckled and gave me a quick peck on my nose, proving his point, “but I wouldn’t change a thing about it.”

And neither would I.