After the Crash

The last thing I remembered was looking up at Ky, trying my best to stay awake and failing. When I opened my eyes, it was dim, but she was there. Her hand was on mine. Her eyes were closed, but she was barely sleeping. I shifted into a more upright position and then winced from the pain I could still feel. I looked down at the bandages wrapped around me. I tried to move again, and this time I woke her. I saw her eyes start to open and all I could say was, “Ky?”

“You’re awake,” she smiled in a sort of relief, before straightening herself up, “I’ll be right back, I gotta get Sam or Mac or …”

“No,” I stopped her, “just sit with me for a while.” She just nodded and did as I said. We sat there silently for a while. At first, we were just looking at each other, but she retreated, letting her head fall and her eyes with it. But she didn’t move, and she kept my hand in hers. At one point I saw Mac and Eric peak their head in and I shook mine. I didn’t want anyone to scare her away. I didn’t know how long I could sustain this moment with her, but I wanted to savor it.

She sighed, after opening her mouth. She wanted to say something but just shook her head. She did this two more times, before she finally said, “you had us worried.”

I raised an eyebrow, “us?”

She nodded, “we’ve gotten used to having you around.” She looked down before raising her eyes to meet mine, “I …” There was a creek on the floorboard, and she turned around swiftly, finding Mac and Whitney in the doorway. Whatever she was about to say was lost. She stood up, moving her hand from mine, “I was about to get Sam,” she looked back with a slight smile, “I trust the two of you will make sure he’s okay, he just woke up. I think after yesterday, between the two of us,” she sighed looking at them, “we probably exhausted a good deal of our medical supplies and um,” she exhaled, “we probably need more bullets. I’ll scout some of the surrounding area.”

“You’re going alone,” Whit stopped her. She just shrugged, ready to leave, but Whit shook her head, “Ky, your shoulder.” She didn’t say anything, just left. Whit and Mac came closer, and Whitney frowned, “didn’t mean to scare her away, hope we didn’t interrupt?”

I shook my head, “she just told me I had everyone worried, and I have doubts that it was gonna get any more sentimental than that.” Sam walked into the room, and I raised my eyebrow at Whitney, “what did you mean her shoulder?”

Sam took a bottle of pills out of his pocket, “use them sparingly, they should help with the pain.” I nodded, popping one of the pills into my mouth. He started examining me, while the other two sat by, and then he answered my question, “she got shot, in the shoulder,” he paused for a second, “the other shoulder.” He shrugged, “didn’t get the chance to check it out,” he shook his head, “she wasn’t about to let us take any resources from you,” he looked toward Whitney, “did it looked deep?” I opened my mouth, and he shook his head, “don’t worry, Ky’s strong took the bullet out and stitched herself up, not many women can do that.”

“Nor many men,” Mac said.

“I’m not sure how deep it was,” Whit answered the question, “I couldn’t tell if she was cursing from pain or because she was upset. I can say that if she strains herself, those stitches are gonna fall out,” she shook her head, “it’s the worst stitch job I’ve seen her do.”

“Upset,” I raised my eyebrow.

“Almost bit my head off, when I made her leave so that we could fix you up,” Sam said, and I still looked at them unsure. He let out a slight laugh, “Ren, you’re not this dense, she cares about you.”

I shook my head, “like she cares for any …”

Whitney shook her head, “It’s different.” I shook mine, but she continued, “Ren she’s never gonna say it if that’s what you’re waiting for. She can’t.” She shrugged, “you gotta take what she gives you.” I looked at her unsure, and she smiled, “god, you should have seen her when I told her you were shot.” She shook her head, “no sane person runs into a seven to one gun fight, not for just anyone, and I even begged her not to go.” She shook her head, “she wasn’t gonna leave you, and she didn’t. Stayed in here all night, holding your hand, because you asked her to stay.”

“You owe her your life,” Sam shrugged, “if she got help before going to you, you probably would have lost too much blood.” He looked at Whitney and then back, “and staying with you, holding your hand,” he shook his head, “that’s no small gesture. Running head first toward danger is easy for her. That’s Ky every day of our life since the crash, not a second thought.” He put something on my wound, and I winced, then he went on, “but the way she was with you, the sentiment, and tenderness,” he shook his head, “that was shocking as all hell.” He laughed, “I mean, the girl’s got no bedside manner, so you can rest assured that’s as real as it gets.”

“She won’t come back in here,” I shook my head.

“You’re not gonna be in here forever,” Sam said.

Whitney smiled, “besides, I don’t think she could stay away.”

I smiled, I had to talk to her, thank her at the very least. Sam did one more thing, rounding out his routine check, before taking a step back. “Alright,” he nodded, “you should be good. I’ll tell the girls you’re all ready for breakfast. I’m sure they’ll be keen on seein’ you, after all,” he gave an amused huff, “you’re a hero.” It seemed like the moment he left; all the girls poured into the room. Lola asked if I was okay. Jen wanted to know when I’d be better. Even Cali and Cheyanne joined in the antics, and the whole time they gushed, calling me a hero.” Amid the commotion, Whitney and Mac managed to slip out, leaving me alone with them. I didn’t feel much like eating and had to explain to them several times that I did not want to be fed, or taken care of in any way, but they were relentless. Jen and Cali were the two who seemed to enjoy playing nurse the most. They came in every hour with wet rags, and god knows what else. Lola had played for a while, but the charade grew tiresome. They had been at my side all day, for hours. I rolled my eyes as Cali put her hand on my forehead and then looked at Jen, “he feels hot.”

I noticed Ky walking by my door. Then I saw her back track and open the door. “Girls,” she looked at them, arms crossed, “for god sake, it’s late, the poor guy got shot, and now he has to deal with you two. Let him sleep.”

“Ky,” Cali looked at her and then confidently said, “we’re making Ren feel better.”

“She just wants him to herself,” Jen looked at Cali as Ky just rolled her eyes. Jen looked back at me and then at her, “you stayed with him last night, just sat here, at least we’re doing something useful.” She looked at me again and patted my forehead with the rag again, before confirming, “right, Ren, we’re making you feel better?”

Ky gave a slightly amused expression, “well, excuse me, I guess I should leave the three of you alone.” She raised her eyebrow at me, “if Ren likes it that much, our hero deserves the hero’s treatment.” I shook my head as Jen and Cali turned toward Ky. I mouthed the word help; I’d do anything to get those two out of here. She rolled her eyes, arms still crossed, “seriously girls, you keep putting that damp rag on his forehead, he’s gonna get night chills, and wake up with a goddamned cold.” She then appealed to them, “wouldn’t want to hurt your big strong hero, would you?” They both looked at each other, then back at me. “If you head to bed now,” Ky said, “you can make sure you’re up early enough to bring him breakfast.”

I nodded my head, “I’m actually pretty tired.” They both sighed but left. Cali made a face at Ky before leaving, and Jen whispered something to her. Ky just shook her head, sending both girls away. “How’s the shoulder,” I looked at her. She raised an eyebrow, and I tried to sit up straighter, “maybe if you told them you were injured too, they’d share the love.”

“And take away your nurses,” she looked at me, half amused, “no thanks. I think they’d prefer their hero be a dashing young man like the fairytales,” she gave a half smile, “I don’t appeal to their fancy quite like you.” She shrugged as she leaned against the door, “besides, barely broke the skin, my injury doesn’t quite compare, does it?”

“Barely broke the skin,” I raised my eyebrow, “I don’t think I buy that.” She just shrugged, and we were quiet for a bit.

“I’m sorry,” she said after some time. I raised my eyebrow, but she wasn’t looking at me. She was looking down, toward the floor, “I should have sent you with one of your guys, not Whit,” she shook her head, “she wasn’t ready for that.” She paused, “I should have had another gun with me. I mean, if Mac or Eric were there, things might have turned out different.” She let out a deep breath, “it was poor planning, and I should have known better.”

I shook my head, “Ky, you couldn’t have known.”

She looked at me, “but I should have anticipated. That’s my job, to anticipate trouble, and …” She let out a deep breath, “well, you’re right, I’m piss poor at thinking things through.”

I sighed, “you saved my life.” She shook her head, and I repeated, “yes, you did, and you didn’t have to come back for me.”

“Like I had a choice,” she let out another heavy breath. I raised an eyebrow, and then she shook her head letting out an awkward breath of humor, “the girls would probably kill me if I let you die, and then we’d have mutiny. I can’t deal with mutiny,” she shrugged, “really I had no choice.”

“I know you would’ve done it for anyone here,” I said, giving her the out.

“Yeah,” she nodded and then let out another breath, “I should probably let you get some rest, the sooner you heal, the sooner we can start moving again.”

She turned to leave, and I stopped her, “Ky, wait.”

She turned toward me, but just shook her head, “I’m on watch, Ren, I’ll check in on you tomorrow.” She moved out, “feel better.” She took two steps, but then came back with a begrudging expression, “and Ren,” I raised my eyebrow and she exhaled, “I’m glad you’re alive.” I smiled as she left the room.

After a few minutes, the door opened again, and I looked up. It was Alex. He shut the door behind him, and I raised my eyebrow. “You look like hell,” he said, and I just kept my eyebrow raised. “So,” he approached, “how long ya gonna be out of commission?”

“Not sure,” I said.

“Is it true she took on seven gunmen?” I raised my eyebrow. He mimicked my expression, “just for you?” I didn’t say anything. He just shrugged, then shook his head, “she’s just a real impressive woman, seven gunmen, a shot to the arm, just for one person in her party?” Again, I said nothing. He looked at me curiously, “when’d you meet her?”

I looked at him, “why should that concern you?”

He shrugged, “just trying to figure out what makes you so special.”

I still didn’t trust him, “I’m not, she’d do it for anyone here.”

He looked at me skeptically, but I just shrugged. He moved on, walking around the room, picking up one of the framed pictures that were in the cabin, when we found it. “Ky seems like a smart woman,” he said putting the frame down and raising his eyebrow, “well educated, before the crash, accomplished a good deal since.” He shrugged, “I mean, her reputation precedes her.” I raised my eyebrow, and he continued, “what do you think her plans are when we get to Boston?”

“What makes you think we’re moving toward Boston,” I looked at him, pushing myself to a more upright position.

“Dale mentioned that there might be a resistance camp there,” he said, “I’m sure she’d be an asset to resistance forces. Don’t you think?” I said nothing, just kept my eye on him, as he moved around the room. “Or,” he raised his eyebrow, “do you think she’ll just go off on her own? She’s not really a team player, is she? Not a real trusting sort?”

“Trust has to be earned,” I looked at him.

“And how did you earn her trust,” he looked at me with an eyebrow raised. I didn’t say anything, just narrowed my gaze. “Listen, Ren,” he looked at me, “I know you don’t trust me, and right now she doesn’t either. Not sure what I can do to gain her trust,” he shrugged, “but I’d like to, and I figure someone’s gotta step up, while you’re recovering, and I’d like to be that person.” He glanced over again while fiddling with what looked like a paperweight, “cover your watch shifts, accompany her on supp …”

I stopped him, “if she needs help, there’s plenty of people here who can help her.” He raised an eyebrow, and I went on, “she doesn’t need you, so you can stop trying to get close to her. She won’t let her guard down.”

He looked at me, with a slight smile, putting down the paperweight, “I think she already has.” He moved toward the door, “goodnight, Ren.”