You Had Me At Hello

Time is a strange concept. It could be minutes, or it could be hours. It didn’t seem to matter. When I was with him, time just simply didn’t exist. I spent almost all of my time with him. Of course, I also spent a lot of it with Mikey. He wanted to remain in the loop, without making it known that he was the mastermind behind the start of it all. Almost a month had passed since Gerard and I got to know each other. In that duration, he hadn’t touched any pills. He didn’t drink unless it was a glass of wine with dinner. He was becoming himself again, from Mikey’s perspective. To me, I saw that he was still the same troubled artist with his heart on his sleeve. He did seem more confident with human interaction. Their parents saw how well he was progressing. Their son was returning to them slowly. He started working on his art again. I gave him ideas on how to handle the urges and cravings. I suggested that he start a daily journal, where he should write one good thing about each day. It seemed to actually be working.

“Hey, sugar,” he said as he sat down next to me. I smiled at him. “So, what’s on the docket for this evening?”

“Nothing that I know of,” I shrugged. “Mikey is going out with Frankie, so I guess it’s just us tonight.”

“I was kind of hoping for that,” he smiled at me. “Can I take you somewhere tonight?” I eyed him suspiciously for a minute. “I can’t tell you where, because if you do agree, I want it to be something of a surprise.” I thought it over for a second. It’s not like I really had any other plans.

“Sure,” I agreed. “One condition though.” He cocked his brow in mild amusement. “I need to know what to dress for.”

“Whatever you want to,” he laughed softly. “Just make sure to bring a jacket.” I nodded.

“Gee, come help me with something,” Mikey called from down the hall. He sighed and got up to go and assist his brother in need. I stood up to stretch my legs, preparing for the walk back home. As I stood, I knocked over a small box. I bent down to pick up its contents when I spotted a small, leatherbound journal. My curiosity got the best of me, and I picked it up. As I flipped through the pages, I smiled. He had been taking my advice on writing about good things from each day. As I skimmed the pages, I found a page marked with today’s date. I looked it over, trying to make up the now-familiar scribbles.

Today marks one month since she came into my life. I don’t know how, or even if, I could ever express how grateful I am for her, just being who she is.

I heard Mikey complaining loudly. His voice drew nearer, so I hurriedly put the journal and other contents back into the box and slid it back onto the desk. I stepped out of his room, only to collide with him.

“Hey, where are you going?” He asked disappointedly.

“I’m going to head home so I can shower and change for tonight.” His eyes lit up as he remembered our plans.

“Oh, okay. Well, do you want me to walk you home?” He asked. I just shook my head. “Okay… Well, I’ll be there around 6:30.”

“Okay, that should give me more than enough time to get ready,” I said as I headed toward the door. He nodded and followed me out. I lit a cigarette for the walk home and handed another to him. He smiled and took it from my hand.

“I’m really not sure how cold it is going to be later, so please make sure to bring a jacket. I don’t want you to get sick,” he pleaded. I smiled at him. He leaned forward and pulled me into his warm embrace. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head on his chest. The warm scent of leather, sandalwood, and cigarette smoke clung to him. It had become a rather comforting smell for me over the past month. I pulled back and he held my gaze for a moment before releasing me. He smiled warmly.

“6:30 can’t get here soon enough.”

* * * * * * *

I was just putting on my shoes when there was a knock at the door. I pulled it open and smiled at the sight. He was wearing a black button down shirt with black jeans. He had slicked his hair back, but there were a couple of strands that refused to conform. He smiled back at me.

“Are you ready to go?”

“I am,” I replied. He smiled and held his arm out in front of him. “Why, thank you kindly.” I pulled the door shut behind me and stepped down the stairs. He followed close behind me until we got to the sidewalk. I looked back at him. “So, can you tell me where we are going now?” He chuckled to himself and shook his head.

“No, but I can tell you that we aren’t going to be walking,” he smiled. I raised a brow at him. He stepped around me and walked over to a beautiful black Impala. I felt my eyes widen.

“Where’d you get that?” I asked in disbelief. He shrugged as he opened the passenger side door for me. “You didn’t decide to take a joyride, did you?” He laughed and shook his head again.

“No, sugar. It’s my dad’s. I asked if I could borrow it for the evening,” he assured me. “They were just so thrilled that I was getting out of the house. He didn’t even ask any questions. Just handed me the keys.” I got into the car gently. I marveled at the beautiful condition of the interior. He shut the door and walked around to the driver’s side. He got in and looked over at me. His expression was mildly amused. “You doing okay over there?”

“I have always wanted a car like this,” I said quietly. I traced the well-polished panel. “What year is it?”

“‘67,” he stated. “It has original interior and parts. It’s been my dad’s baby for longer than I’ve been alive. It was the first car he bought for himself.” I nodded in understanding. He turned the key, and the car roared to life.

“So, can you tell me where we are going now?”

“Nope, you’re just going to have to wait and see,” he smirked. I rolled my eyes and watched the streetlights pass by. We drove in silence for a good fifteen minutes or so before he turned down a side street. I looked over at him and smiled. He was carefully watching the road. The moonlight was bright against his skin. I felt the car roll to a stop, and it brought me back to reality. I looked out the window and felt an instant panic as I no longer recognized where we were. He put the car into park and shut it off. I looked over at him.

“So, where are we exactly?” I asked warily. “Mikey does know that we were going somewhere, right?” Hurt flashed through his eyes for a second before he nodded.

“Yeah,” he said softly. “Maybe this was a bad plan.” He looked back out the window. I shook my head, feeling rather guilty for being so worried. The majority of me felt like he wouldn’t do anything to hurt me, but there was still that nagging in the back of my mind.

“It’s fine. It’s just my anxiety. You just never know what kind of dangers are around,” I tried to comfort him. He looked back at me, and I smiled at him. He seemed a little less hurt, but it was still evident.

“Okay, well… This is where we are going,” he said quietly. He got out of the car and walked around to my side to open the door. I stepped out and shut the door behind me. “Hang on just a second.” He walked around to the trunk and opened it. I scanned the area for any remote sign of where we were. All that I could see were trees. He returned to my side, carrying a blanket and a bag. I looked at him with confusion. “It’s a surprise. Don’t worry. I’m not going to hurt you. I could never.”

“Okay, I trust you,” I replied. “I just don’t know what exactly it is that we are doing. All I see is a long stretch of unlit road and a freakin’ forest.” He smiled at me and grabbed my hand with his empty one. He led me through the grass, right up to the tree line. I followed him cautiously. I could make out a slight path through the trees. He followed the path, walking slowly so that I wouldn’t trip. After what seemed like forever, we came to a small clearing. There was a couple pieces of old playground equipment and a broken picnic table. We walked to the center of the clearing before he let go of my hand. He spread out the blanket and began rifling through the bag. I watched as he pulled out a couple of candles and lit them. He also pulled out two glasses, a bottle of wine, and three small containers.

“So, a late night picnic?” I asked. He looked back at me and smiled.

“I know,” he laughed quietly. “It’s super corny, but I wanted to do something special.” I smiled at the sentiment of it all. He sat down and patted the spot next to him. I joined him on the ground. My anxiety was slowly subsiding. He opened two of the containers, handing one of them to me. He opened the wine and poured each of us a glass. He reached into the bag and pulled out silverware, wrapped carefully inside a napkin. I couldn’t help but smile at the amount of effort he had put into this.

“Wow, this is definitely different,” I commented. He looked over at me as he unfolded his own silverware. “I can honestly say that I have never had a picnic in an abandoned park at night.” He smiled slightly.

“Well, I’m glad I could do something unique.” He took a bite. “I hope you like the food. I made it after you left. I also tried my hand at dessert.” I arched my brows in surprise.

“If you made it, I’m sure I’ll love it. You are a phenomenal cook,” I complemented. I took a bite of my own food and nodded. “I was right. This is amazing.” I saw the satisfaction in his eyes as I ate. We sat and made small talk while we ate. After we finished the entree and dessert, he poured us each another glass of wine.

“So, tell me something,” he started. He swirled the wine in the glass. “What made you decide to stay and talk to me that day? We had minimal conversation prior to then. Logically, I assumed you would have just gone back home and waited for Mikey there.” Shit.

“Um, I don’t know really. I just figured it would be a good time,” I shrugged off. He looked at me for a moment before shaking his head.

“I just wondered. It was right after a really bad night, and I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Mikey had a hand in it,” he coaxed. Shit, shit, shit.

“Nah,” I dismissed. He tilted his head, not fully believing what I was saying.

“So, you didn’t know? He didn’t try to bribe you into playing therapist?” He pressed. I shook my head again. I knew he wasn’t going to drop it. I searched for an explanation that would have sufficed for the time being.

“No,” I started. “Well, that’s a lie. I did know about what had happened… He didn’t put me up to it though. It just seemed like an opportune time, since you were there alone. I just figured you could use a friend.” He seemed to think it over for a couple of minutes before settling to accept it.

“Well, it’s been a whole month since that night,” he said softly. “I haven’t felt this human in years. I actually look forward to waking up each day. I found a light in the darkness.” He went quiet again. “You did that, you know? You didn’t even have to try. You were just yourself, and you’ve seemingly accepted me for the whole damn mess that I am…” He took a drink from the glass. I studied him as we sat in silence. The moonlight illuminated his features. He seemed both content and nervous at the same time.

“Well, I just have a natural ability to get through to people,” I said, attempting to break the silence. “All I’ve wanted to do my whole life is help people.” He smiled to himself.

“Well, you have helped me. You have helped me more than I could ever tell you. I can’t tell you enough how amazing you are, or how grateful I am for you to have come into my life when you did. I was on a path of self-destruction that was only ending in one of two places.” He stopped and looked over at me. “If you asked me a month ago where I’d be now, I would have just told you hopefully dead. Not now, though.” He stretched his legs out and laid down. I laid down next to him, and I felt the warmth of his body against my skin. I felt myself shiver involuntarily. Only at that moment did I realize that I had not heeded his warning about grabbing a jacket. “You forgot a jacket.”

“I swear, you are a fucking mind reader,” I laughed. “I was literally just realizing that myself.” He chuckled softly, and he put his arm around me, pulling me closer to him. I laid my head on his chest and listened to his gentle breathing. We laid in silence, listening to the sounds of the night. A gentle breeze flowing through the trees, rustling the leafs. The small woodland critters moving across the dark scenery. Crickets chirping. It was so calming.

“Can I ask you something else?” He asked suddenly. I lifted my head to look at him. I nodded slowly. “I don’t really have to have an answer now, but I would like for you to think about it.” I felt my heart sink as he looked down at me. I nodded again. “This has been the best thirty days of my life. You’re to thank for that. I was just wondering if maybe…” He stopped for a second. I could hear his heartbeat pick up as he grew nervous. “I feel like I have known you for years.”

“Well, technically, you have,” I said light-heartedly, hoping he wasn’t about to say what I thought he was. He gave me a half-smile and shook his head.

“Yes, I have known you, but I haven’t known you. My point is, I feel like we just kind of clicked, and it just feels natural to be with you. I was wondering if maybe you would be willing to give this a shot.” I laid my head back on his chest. I was afraid that he would ask that. I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t planning on having an actual romantic relationship with him. “Like I said, I don’t really expect an answer right now. I know it’s sudden, and I totally get it if you don’t want to decide right now. Or if you just don’t want you, that’s fine too. I just know how I feel about you, and I just wanted to put it out there, in case… Well, I guess… Just in case you felt the same. Again, no pressure.”

“Okay,” I said quietly. “I’ll think about it.” I felt him nod. We returned to the silence. A thousand thoughts were running through my head. I felt him gently kiss the top of my head, and in an instant, the thoughts calmed down. The peace of the quiet night returned. I listened to the sound of his breathing, and I felt myself drift off to sleep.