The Pain I've Grown to Know

{2 months later - Leana's POV}

I have no idea why he had chosen this day as their wedding day. Granted, 2 months ago all of this seemed like a good date to Matt, but right now, I am having a crying Lea on the other side of this God forsaken bathroom door and I can't handle hearing her sobs through it.

"Lea, I am serious! If you're not letting me in right now, I will get Jimmy or Brian to break down this door and tell Matt he can stick this wedding where the sun doesn't shine if you're this unhappy."

Her sobbing subsided for a few moment s and much to my relief, I heard he shovel around, but she didn't come near the door. Someone opened the door, and both Zack and Zion popped their heads in, Zion sitting on his father's hip.

"You two almost ready? People are waiting and Matt's about to freak out thinking she's gonna make a run for it."

I threw my hands up in the air and huffed.

"She locked herself in there 20 minutes ago and cries herself silly. I was just about to get one of you to break down this stupid door! I am at my ends, she doesn't listen to me. We may as well blow the whole thing off, we're already 5 minutes late."

Zack came in and closed the door behind him. I had to admit, the spark in his eyes when I mentioned to blow the wedding off was unsettling me a little bit. Jimmy had mentioned months ago that Zack was still in love with Lea, but I had not noticed anything off in the past few months at all, he had even been helping Matt to organize stuff.
He was now standing next to me and raised his hand to knock on the door. Zion looked tired, his head was resting on Zack's shoulder. Good thing my parents were watching my daughter Jade today, it would have been a nightmare to have her here with me today.

"L. ? What's wrong baby? Come on, open the door, everyone is waiting for you and Zion wants to see you, too."

Finally, we both heard her move and the lock of the door snapped. She opened the door and was wiping away some of her running mascara, waterproof my ass!
I observed Zacky's features and could tell, that he had a lump in his throat and a dry mouth. He was looking at the simple white Greek Goddess style dress that fell off her shoulders. She had insisted that she wanted to wear something that she was comfortable in and that would not show off her belly too much, and I had come up with this style of dress. It was rather low cut on both back and front, and watching Zack's reactions, i knew that Mat's jaw would drop as well. We had pinned up her curls loosely and some of them were still hanging out of the main bunch. I had wanted her to wear a tiara, but she didn't want any fancy stuff, but simply let me put a few thin strands of golden rope around her hair and I had to admit, it looked awesome.

"Lea, you look...stunning! Why are you barricading yourself in there and behave like there's no tomorrow?"

She held her belly tight and looked up at me, a silent beg for me to leave the room. I didn't like the shadow of pain on her face, but I might have mistaken it for her feeling bad that she was shoving me out of the room like this, I was her matron of honor after all!

"OK, I am leaving! But if you three are not out in 5 minutes, I'll get Jimmy and he'll kick your ass to walk down this aisle. You look beautiful hon!"

With that I kissed her cheek and slipped out of the room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
{Normal POV}

Zack set Zion on the floor and walked the few steps over to Lea, rubbing her cheek with his thumbs. He wasn't blind: he had seen her various facial expressions and knew that there was more then just a case of wedding jitters. He had been cut off air when he had seen her come out of the bathroom, she looked stunning and once more he was wishing it would be him she was getting married to, and not Matt, but now was not the time to bring this up. She looked fragile and as soon as Leana had closed the door pain was taking hold of her face for a few seconds, as her hand was once more grabbing her swollen tummy.

"Fuck, this little bastard is making me squirm since an hour now! I wanna look happy and beautiful when I walk down this stupid aisle to become his wife, not wincing in pain! Can we not just...do all of this tomorrow? Please?"

The begging in her voice made Zack exhale and he looked into her brown eyes, that were still swimming in tears.

"You sure that these are not contractions? That would be pretty much the only reason Matt would accept for this whole thing not going down today. He's nervous as hell and keeps pulling on his lip ring, I swear, if we wait any longer he'll pull it out of his damn flesh!"

At least this seemed to bring a smile to her lips, and she went into her knees to rough through Zion's hair, smiling at him.

"You do know that things will be changing for Zion once you get married to Matt and you two have the baby, right?"

She looked up at him, confusions weaving through her eyes.

"I just mean, you will need to focus on the newborn, and Matt will be head over heels with his baby...I'm a little afraid that he'll feel left out. I was thinking if I could take him off your hands for the first few weeks after the baby is born...just to give you time to adjust again and all."

She shot up and put her fists into her hips, her eyes spitting fire at the man standing in front of her.

"What the hell are you trying to say Zack? Are you telling me that I will love Matt's kid more than Zion? My first born? You cannot be serious!"

He pulled his hands through his raven hair, looking from her down to their son, who's lip started to quiver by the sound of his mother's raised voice. It wasn't often that Lea raised her voice, and he was scared because of it. Zack new that this was neither the time nor the place to bring this up, but looking at the condition she was in...if she'd get upset enough she might go into labor and the wedding would be off.
He shook his head, hating himself for the thought that had just crossed his mind.

"No, I would never say or even think that Lea! I just thought that it would make it easier for you and Matt at the start. I know you both love Zion and nothing will change that. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up."

"I sometimes really don't know what the fuck is going on in that head of yours Baker! I mean...fuck! Here I am, mother of your child, and on the day I am supposed to get married to one of your best friends, you're telling me I won't be able to look after two kids! What the fuck is wrong with you!?"

Zack quickly closed the distance between them further and crushed his lips unto hers, holding her head on both sides, making her swallow any further insults she was planning on. Her body tightened under the kiss, but he didn't release her lips, but kept kissing her, wanting to plunder her mouth.
A knock came from the door and then Jimmy's voice followed after.

"You two OK?"

Zack disconnected from her lips and looked at her. Her lips were slightly apart and her breathing was a little ragged, still in surprise of the kiss. Zack bent down and picked up Zion, who was still looking up at his mom in confusion an fright.

"I'll always love you Lea, and even if Matt is making you his wife today, know that I am always here for you if you need me. Or if he fucks up. Or when you just want me to be around and take you in my arms. And now, get that shocked look off your face and go out there, before that lucky bastard goes mental."

He went to the door and slipped out, leaving Jimmy and Leana stand in the door, looking at Lea and Zack in confusion. Lea raising her voice meant that something had been going on, and that Zacky had said something that he should have kept to himself on a day like this.

"Let's get this show on the road!"

Jimmy sighed and kissed his wife, pushing her back into the room with Lea.

"What was that all about? Never mind, come here, let me fix up the make up a little and let's do this...unless you changed your mind?"

Leana hoped that Lea would not have changed her mind. Matt had been over the moon after they had announced that she had accepted his proposal, and that the baby she was carrying was his and not his band mate's. If Lea would run at this stage, he would freak out, be destroyed and most likely do things that would not only harm others, but him as well.

"No, it's OK. I'm fine, just some...misunderstanding. I'm fine! Let's put Sanders out of his misery, shall we?"

She stared into her friend's smiling eyes and watched her as she opened the door and shouted to Jimmy to get everyone ready. Another sharp pain ripped through her belly and she held her breath trying to swallow it down.
This was not right! The baby wasn't due for at least another 3 weeks, but it felt like contractions, maybe fake ones. The stress leading to this day have been too much, and then Zack...!

Leana gave her a sign and they both walked out of Matt's and her bedroom. Everyone was gathered outside in the garden. The sun was catching the pure white fabric of the dress as she exited the house. She could hear some acoustic guitar playing as Dave came to her side, a big smile on his face. Seen that her parents had died years ago, he had taken the honor to walk her down the aisle, and she wouldn't have wanted it any other way. The 30 odd guests were now standing from their chairs, blocking off her view to the table where Marriage Celebrant was waiting for her. And Matt, the love of her life.
Dave kissed the top of her head and they made their way down towards where she could now see the back of Matt.

As some people gasped and whispered to each other, Matt couldn't help it anymore but turn around towards the house. His heart missed a few beats, as his eyes focused on the woman in white walking towards him. The simple dress looked breath taking on her, her long curls had been taken back from her soft face, and some gold sparkled from within the thick locks. She had a dreamy look in her eyes, and he just wanted to run over to her and kiss her silk-soft skin, inhale her summer smell. But something was off. It looked like she was breathing heavily and the hand that was holding on to the small bouquet of jasmine was pressed so hard against her belly, that some of her knuckles had turned white.

She's nervous, just as I am, that's all.
He told himself and finally, a wave of relief washed over him, as her expression relaxed again.
Dave and Lea stopped next to Matt, and Matt didn't even wait for Dave to hand him her hand, but he swiftly took it and raised it to his lips, kissing it softly. She smiled up at him and he could see the tears in her ebony colored eyes. They took the last few steps to the waiting Celebrant together, and the music stopped as everyone was positioned in front of the small table.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Today, Lea, I join my life to yours, not merely as your husband and father of our unborn child, but as your friend, your lover, and your confidant.
Let me be the shoulder you lean on, the rock on which you rest, the companion of your life. With you I will walk my path from this day forward.
I take you, with all your faults and strengths,
as I offer myself to you
with all my faults and strengths.
I will help you when you need help, and
turn to you when I need help.
I choose you as the person with whom I will spend my life."

Matt's strong voice was carried over the crowd, as he slipped the slim white gold wedding band unto her finger. The small diamonds were reflecting the perfect sunlight and caught some of the blue sky. He looked up at her and his free hand quickly rose up to her cheeks, as a tear was rolling down her cheek. Over the past 15 minutes that the Celebrant had been talking he had noticed that she had been unsettled, had been holding her belly and stepped from one foot to the other.But at this moment, she was perfectly still, giving him a soft smile.

"I used to be afraid of falling in love, of giving my heart away again after so many hardships. How could I trust a man to love me, to give to me all that I wanted to give to him?
Matthew, when I met you all these years ago, I realized how much we could share together. You have renewed my life and my trust in love months ago and I thank you for this.
Thank you for taking me as I am; loving me, and welcoming me into your heart.
I promise to always love you, respect you as an individual, my lover and father of my child, and to be faithful to you forever.
Today I choose you to be my partner, and commit myself to you for the rest of my life."

Her voice was quivering, as she slid the cold ring unto his left ring finger and another tear freed itself from her eyes, falling unto the back of Matt's big hand.
She raised her head and both their eyes met. Whereas he was moved by all this, and by the vows she had written, worry took over instantly as her face contorted in pain while the Celebrant's words - declaring them lawful wedded husband and wife - almost became inaudible to her and him. She sunk to the ground, her hand tightly gripping his as he was just about able to cushion her fall. Brian, Zack and Jimmy were immediately at his side and Leana had jumped behind her and supported her back.
She could feel the material of her dress soak and she looked down at herself, a curtain of haze moving over her eyes as she eyed the slightly red liquid staining her wedding dress, the fabric getting more moist by the second. She felt exhausted and with the next wave of pain, she was physically and mentally unable to swallow a deep moan this time.

"What the fuck is happening? It's too early, she's only 8 months along, it's at least-"

Jimmy mouthed in shock, as Matt quickly picked her up bridal style, how fitting, and hoisted her unto his strong arms, looking around the crowd of confused guests. He was scared and happy and...

"Get out of the fucking way Sullivan, Baker, Haner! I need to get her to the hospital. Leana, can you drive, please! I need to get my wife to the hospital now!

Leana's small figure was shoving people out of the way and made a line free for Matt to follow her through the ranks of friends of family that were now raising their voices in confusion and shock. Adrenalin was pumping through his veins and all he could do was run after his friend's wife, and looking down into his wife's face, trying to find an answer in her blunt eyes.

"You all stay here, party, drink...whatever."

He could hear a kid starting to cry and he stopped in his tracks, whipping his head back over his shoulder.
Zion still stood at the table where Lea had just sunk unto the ground seconds earlier. He was looking at the tiled floor, a puddle of liquid mixed with blood around his small sandal-clad feet. A sharp pain grabbed his heart and he kept running through the house, tears misting over his eyes.

Please, please let her have the baby with no complications. Let the baby be alright. Let my wife be OK. Dear Gods, if you've never listened to me, please hear me now and protect my only love and our child!