The Good Life

It was the day before New Year’s Eve. I had just gotten home from work and took my usual spot in the guest bedroom with the TV on. I couldn’t go into me and Joe’s room, every time I looked in there, the fight replayed in my head and it made it that much harder for me to carry on with my life. It’s been five days, eight hours, and twenty three minutes since I’ve spoken to Joe, five days, eight hours, and twenty three minutes since I’ve spoken at all, and five days, eight hours and twenty three minutes since I had lost my everything.

I was laying in the bed watching the Home Shopping Network. It was the only TV show that didn’t send me into hysterics because of something that reminded me of Joe. I heard heavy footsteps on the stairs, my heart started beating faster in anticipation. I knew who I wanted it to be, but I knew it wouldn’t be him. It couldn’t be.

I lifted my head up, wiping my eyes as the door creaked open and someone walked into my room. I instantly recognized him and sunk back into the bed and the uncontrollable sobbing started up again, merely because the person who walked in was a boy, and at this point, anyone with a penis reminded me of Joe.

Hutch.

“Kayden! Oh my God. What’s the matter? I’ve been calling you and calling you and you haven’t been answering so I got worried and I called the studio and Quin said something was really wrong with you, that you haven’t spoken since the day that J—” I clapped my hand over his mouth and spoke the only words that had left my lips since he actually had left. “Don’t you dare say his name.” I threatened, my voice coming out low, raspy, and barely there due to the non use and the crying. Hutch walked over to the bed and sat on the edge and looked down at me pushing the hair out of my face, “Kayden, tell me what’s going on.”

His eyes were sympathetic and I knew he really wanted to help. I had controlled my crying but the revelation that just hit me, the fact that I really had a best friend who cared about me, really truly cared about me and wanted to be there for me and make it okay, made my bottom lip quiver and I lifted myself up wrapping my arms around his neck, his instantly wrapping around my waist and stroking my back, “Shh, Kayden, it’s going to be alright.” He cooed into my ear attempting to calm me down.

After a few minutes I gained my composure and pulled back, I inhaled a shaky breath and sat back against the headboard as he sat Indian style in front of me watching me carefully. “Okay, I’m ready.” I said and began to tell him the story, I told him every detail, choking back the pain radiating from my sore throat and pushing pass the sobs wishing to escape. “…and I just kept driving.” I said my eyes glazing over, “I ran from him. He was chasing after me, and I kept running.” I lifted my eyes to look at Hutch, his eyes were glossy and he blinked a few times causing a tear to fall down his cheek, “Kayden.” He whispered. “I’m so sorry.” He leaned forward pulling me into a tight bear hug and let me cry into his shirt.

He pulled back after a few minutes, “You have to fix this.” I shook my head, “I can’t, I told him it was too late, it IS too late, Hutch, it’s ruined.” He shook his head and grabbed my hands, “Kayden, if it was too late, and this relationship was ruined, would you be falling apart like this?” I looked up at him, “Am I falling apart?” His eyes met mine, “Kay, I think you fell apart when you left him behind.” I cringed as I unwillingly remembered that day and shook my head to clear it out. “You have to fix this, Kayden.” Hutch repeated more stern this time. “He is doing his job, he would fix it but he’s not under the right circumstances,” He let out a puff of air and continued, “It’s your responsibility this time.”

I replayed Hutch’s words in my mind. I had to make things okay. There was no way in hell that I could live my life without Joe Jonas, he was the light in my darkness, he was the answer to my question, the right to my wrong, my equalizer, my protector, my haven, the love of my life, my everything, and I had to have him back.

A small smile played on my lips, “What do I do?” I asked looking up at Hutch who was grinning like a maniac.

Joe’s P.O.V.

She left, she actually left, she ran from me, I chased her, and she ran. How did this happen? I went from the happiest man on the planet who had everything he could ask for to rock bottom, because without her, I had nothing.

I called Kevin and asked him to pick me up on the way to the airport, he tried to ask me where Kayden was but every time he mentioned her name, I cringed as the silent tears rolled down my face. We got to the airport and my whole family kept asking about Kayden and what was wrong and what happened and where was she? I finally snapped, I yanked the ring out of my coat pocket and held it up to them, “She gave it back! Okay? Now will you all just shut the fuck up and leave me alone?” I half yelled at my family. They all stared at me with stunned expressions. My dad glared at me, as mom came and wrapped her arms around me, “Oh, Joseph.” She said motioning for everyone to go away. I laid my head on her shoulder, “Mom, what do I do?” She rubbed my back, “She’ll come around Joe, whatever it is, you’ll make it through.” I pulled back and looked at her, “I don’t know mom I really messed up. I was just so mad.” She pulled me back to her, “It’ll be okay.”

I apologized to my brothers and my dad, they forgave, as always and said they’d be there for me like I always knew they would be.

We climbed in the plane and made our way to New Jersey where we would play our last shows and then finish off in New York. I kept my hand shoved in my pocket, slipping her ring on and off my pinky and looking out the window regretting everything wrong I’d ever done to her. She didn’t deserve it. She was perfect and I was jealous and I picked a fight to make her feel bad and ruined everything.

I ruined my whole life in ten minutes.

Kayden’s P.O.V.

“Why did I listen to you?” I asked as I was saying goodbye to Hutch at security at the airport. “Why?” I repeated as he wrapped his arms around me. It was two o’clock on New Year’s Eve, with the six hour flight and three hour time difference I was lucky to make it there on time. Hutch put his hands on my shoulders, “Kayden, you can do this you ARE going to do this.” I nodded and numbly made my way through security, “I love you Kayden!” Hutch called giving me a thumbs up. I shook my head and waved back at him, “Love ya Hutch!” I called.

I got into my seat on the plane and was relieved when we took off and no one was sitting next to me. I tried to sleep but I couldn’t, I kept asking myself questions in my mind and answering them to myself, ‘What would he do? Would he accept me? Would he run away? Would everything be okay?’ I couldn’t stop. I wanted to call Nick or Kevin to see what hotel they were staying at but by the time I got there I would have to go straight to them I watched the clock on my phone as it changed time zones. The last change. MY phone read 10:45—“Thirty minutes until we land at JFK ladies and gentlemen.” The captain interrupted my thoughts. ‘Holy hell, one hour, in one hour, I would have to confront him.’ I began to panic.

“I can’t do this. I can’t do this. Oh my God, I can’t do this.” I whispered to myself as I shut my eyes tightly. An image of Joe heaped over in the middle of the street drifted onto my mind and my eyes shot open, “I have to do this.” I said to myself a little louder.

We finally arrived at the airport and I listened to the captain over the intercom, “We have currently landed in New York, I hope you all enjoy your time spent here, it is currently 11:19 PM, Happy New Year, folks.” I grabbed my bag in the overhead compartment and rushed out the door to baggage claim. I got my suitcase and found the Trump Hotel, the hotel the boys usually stayed at when they were here, kiosk and handed over my luggage to get it sent to the hotel. I ran out the airport with my heart beating out of my chest. I hailed a cab and climbed in, “Time’s Square, please.” He turned and looked at me, “Are you crazy lady?” I glared at him, “Yes, I am, now go.”

We hit traffic about seven blocks away, I looked down at my phone, 11:37, “Shit” I muttered to myself, “I’m getting out here.” I said throwing the guy a twenty, “Keep the change.” I yelled over my shoulder.

And I ran.

But this time I was running to him. I had spent enough time running from him, I had practically ruined our relationship by running away from him, but now I was running to him. I had to fix this.

I got to the back of the crowd I could see the stage ahead of me, I didn’t know where he would be, I didn’t know anything, I just wanted to find him in the next 9 minutes.

I pushed past people ignoring the rude remarks and glares that people were shooting at me and just kept running. I pushed my body to the limit and the stage was getting closer. I saw the announcers standing there with a large group of people behind them, no one was performing due to the closeness of the hour so they were chatting into the camera about God knows what. As I got closer, it was harder to get past people and I also noticed that behind the announcers were the performers.

I stopped in my tracks and scanned the mass of people looking for the face of the man that I wanted to stare at for the rest of my life, I looked down at my phone, three minutes. Tears started coming to my eyes, it wasn’t going to happen, he’d never see me, hell, I couldn’t even see hi—. “Oh my God.” I breathed out as spotted him a little on the right behind Nick and Kevin.

I couldn’t take my eyes off of him, he looked miserable. He had a smile on his face but it wasn’t my Joe. I snapped out of my trance wondering what I was going to do. I spotted Big Rob standing on the side of the stage and quickly found his phone number in my contacts, I made my way to the gate that led to the stage. I called his phone and watched him, “Please answer. Please answer. Please answer.” I muttered as I held my hand over my left ear trying to hear. I saw him dig into his pocket and look at his phone answering it quickly, “Kayden! What’s wrong?” I smiled. “Rob, I’m here.” I watched him look around confused, "Where? he asked, “In New York.” I made it to the first gate and held on for dear life, “I’m at the gate, come get me I have to get to Joe.”

I heard the crowd counting down, “FIFTY TWO, FIFTY ONE, FIFTY—” I watched Rob tell something to the guard next to him and start walking down the steps. I tapped my hands nervously on the gate. “FORTY THREE, FORTY TWO, FORTY ONE—” Rob was talking to the four security guards in front of the second gate to the stage and pointing at me whispering in their ears then pointing to the stage, he then showed them his pass and they nodded their heads.

“TWENTY EIGHT, TWENTY SEVEN, TWENTY SIX, TWENTY FIVE—” I watched the ball getting lower and lower as Rob made his way to me, through the first gate, then through the second, telling another set of security guards something, pointing to the first set of security guards, “Oh, come on!!” I yelled to myself. Rob finally got to me and laid a hand on my back steering me towards the stage, I got to the stairs of the stage and took a deep breath.

“THRITEEN, TWELVE, ELEVEN—” I ran up the flight of stairs, “EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX!” I made it to the top and screamed, “Joe!” His head whipped towards me and his eyes lit up, the tears were streaming down my face and he pushed past his brothers making his way towards me, “THREE!” He was in arms reach, “TWO!” His hands moved to my cheeks, mine found his waist, “ONE!” He smiled and leaned towards me, our lips connecting, “HAPPY NEW YEAR!” Everyone screamed.

'Finally.' I thought melting into Joe's arms.