All Was Golden in the Sky

“Oh, Lord. You’ve become the type to go out wearing sun glasses. So it begins.” Hannah rolled her eyes at me as she sipped on her mocha Frappuccino. Despite her sarcasm, I could see a hint of a smile tugging at the corner of her lips, so I just ignored her.

Kara tutted over her green tea. “Annie’s practically a celebrity now! It’s part of the deal.” Kara was a bit of a spazz, but her heart was in the right place. She smiled at me and held the door open for me as I walked out of the Starbucks, followed closely by Hannah.

“Annie’s been a celebrity for a while, though!” Hannah argued. “Ever since she and Brendon started dating.”

“Guys,” I interrupted. “I’m not at all, okay? Now let’s get back to the task at hand.” Those two always bickered about my status in the world of celebrities. With all the new tweets by Shane obviously directed towards me that had surfaced in the past month, their belief that I was now somehow part of the world of stardom. I, however, wanted to ignore all of that, and instead liked Brendon’s suggestion for coping with the stress—getting ideas for the wedding.

Kara sighed and evened her pace to match mine, leaving Hannah trudging along behind us on the sidewalk. “Did you guys decide on a date yet?” she asked.

“Next April,” I nodded. I smiled, thinking about how excited Brendon had been during the discussion when we’d decided upon that month.

“Ten months,” he’d said, tangling his fingers in my hair like he had a habit of doing. “Ten months and then we get to start the rest of forever. I can’t wait, Annie!”

“Annie!” Kara raised an eyebrow at me when I turned to her. “Geeze, Anne, you’re getting super spacy.”

Hannah snorted from behind us. “What do you expect? She’s in love and marrying the best guy in the world! Of course she’s gonna be spacy. She’s poetic enough to be all about that happily-ever-after-daze shit.”

“Haters gonna hate,” I chided. I glanced down at my phone, checking for the directions I’d saved in my notes earlier. “Okay, so the dress place should just be the next block over.”

“Are we gonna look for your dress, Annie?” Kara asked.

“Nah, I wanted to find some bridesmaids dresses. My dress can wait.”

They both rolled their eyes at me, knowing damn well I’d cave if I saw the perfect dress, but instead of poking fun at me they decided to babble about what colors they thought I’d force them in to. The more I listened to their chattering, the more tempted I was to choose a Pepto-Bismol pink. Accompanied by Little Bo Beep hats.

At first, the women in the store seemed a bit pretentious, but when it became obvious I was marrying a man with money they warmed right up to us. They were nearly falling over each other throwing color swatches at us and flinging dress samples around like their arms were runways. Hannah looked irritated, Kara looked frightened, and I was trying very hard to level my breathing to eliminate the feeling of claustrophobia.

“Thank you, very much. I think we’re going to talk about our choices now.” Bless Hannah, bless her to heaven and above. The woman shot her a quick glare, but left us alone with our options and some champagne glasses. Hannah stuck her tongue out at their retreating backs, and then plopped down next to me on the plush couch.

“Thanks, Hannah,” I breathed. My ring was clinking against the glass of my drink as my hands shook. I never could handle so much pressure all up in my face.

She smiled softly at me and placed a hand over mine, making me steady. “No problem, honey.”

Kara sifted through the rack of dresses the women had left for us to look through. “Some of these aren’t too bad,” she noted, pursing her lips in approval. “I mean, eliminate some of the lace and add some boob coverage, and you’ve got some fine specimens here.”

“Some of them do seem to be a bit much,” Hannah agreed. She held up one of the hangers, sticking her tongue out at the putrid coloring of the gown. “Damn, Anne, you sure about this?”

I scrunched up my nose as I took in the dress. Pea green with flowers on it? In which country is this fashionable?

“We’re just here for ideas. One idea I’ve had from this whole thing is not allowing that color within a thousand feet of my wedding,” I said. The girls giggled and I hung the atrocity back up. I brushed off my hands and set them firmly on my hips. “All right, ladies. Let’s get cracking!”

Kara was the one who suggested playing 80s montage on her phone as they tried on the dresses. They’d both do a little dance each time they emerged from the dressing rooms, adding some kind of shake or inappropriate thrust to give the full effect. The women in the store seemed to be a little irritated, with the exception of one little old lady who kept shuffling around and shooting us little smiles.

The girls even convinced me to try on a few of the dresses for fun. They were laughing their asses off when I tossed the dressing room curtain aside and sashayed out into the room. I spun on my heel, doing my very best to imitate a strut down the catwalk. The looks on Kara and Hanna’s faces implied I was not doing a very good job at being seductive—but damn it all if I wasn’t hilarious.

“God, it’s no wonder you and Brendon get along so well,” Hannah gasped, clutching her sides. “You both sway your hips the same way.”

“Maybe they’re just used to moving their hips together,” Kara sniggered. I blushed and gently slapped her arm, only making them both laugh even harder. “Oh, please, Annie! We all know you and Brendon fuck like rabbits!”

I was about to protest, but I would’ve been lying. Kara and Hannah very suddenly ceased their laughing and looked guiltily away. I raised an eyebrow at them, but before I could say anything a tiny hand on my forearm immediately quieted me. I looked down and was mortified to see the smiling old woman that worked there. And she heard all about me and my fiancée having sex. Poor, sweet woman!

I was sure my face was all kinds of red, but she offered me a smile that seemed to say she’d chosen to ignore what she’d just overheard. “Are you the bride, honey?” she asked. My God, her voice was like an angel-food cake. I could only nod, my voice still dead from my embarrassment.

Her smile just widened. “I couldn’t help but notice how much fun you all were having trying on those bridesmaids dresses. But sweetie, shouldn’t you be trying on a wedding gown?”

My voice gurgled up. “Oh, well, actually, yeah, probably.”

God, she probably thought I was a fucking idiot.

“I have one I’d like you to try.” I couldn’t even argue with her when she shooed me into the dressing room. Judging by the looks the other women in the store were wearing, she was the authority in the place. And so I didn’t argue when she followed me in, either, brandishing a swish of white fabric over her arm. “Just humor me,” she said, holding it out for me to take when I was ready.

Staring at all the white in her hands, I felt my heart start to pound in my chest, so hard that my autopsy report might say ‘death by kangaroo to the heart’. A wedding dress. I was about to wear a wedding dress.

The idea both terrified and excited me at the same time.

The woman, who was polite enough to tell me her name was Ida, waited patiently as I slowly stripped off the bridesmaid dress I’d been goofing around in. She turned away until I had the white dress—that wedding dress—pulled up to my chest, and then she offered to help zip me up. I was afraid to look in the mirror. I cried the other day just thinking about how amazing our wedding cake was going to be. What was I going to do when I saw this?

Ida suggested I walk out and show the girls how I looked, and so, still avoiding any glance into the mirror, I shyly pulled back the curtain. Kara had turned off the 80s music, and all I heard when I stepped out was the sharp intake of breath. I decided it would probably be okay to give them a glance, but I instantly wished I hadn’t. That damn Kara had tears in her eyes, and Hannah had most of her face covered with her hands. I jumped when I heard a sob.

“Is it that bad?” I asked, helplessly reaching a hand out to comfort her.

Hannah shook her head, and when she pulled her hands away she was smiling. “No! No, it’s just…your boobs look so beautiful!”

I knew she was trying to make us all laugh, and it kind of worked, but then I caught a glimpse of myself. Shocked, I turned to face the mirror head on, and the room grew silent again.

When I met Brendon, I knew I was done for. From that day on, I knew I’d never fall in love again.

Well, that dress proved me wrong. Because fall in love with it, I did.

In fact, falling in love might even be too casual an explanation for my feelings for that dress. I worshipped it. I never wanted to stop looking at it. I just wanted to turn and observe how well it fit me all day long. I wanted to run my hands over the soft skirt, and admire the places it bunched up. All I could think about was how completely it made me feel like a princess, and when my eyes locked onto Ida’s in the mirror, she seemed to have read my mind.

“It’s a new one we just got in,” she explained. “It’s part of the Disney wedding collection. That one right there is Belle.”

Belle. I knew that skirt reminded me of another kick ass dress. And the minute she said Disney, I fell in love all over again.

“Oh, Annie, it’s perfect,” Kara breathed, trying to wipe away the tears trailing down her cheeks.

Ida, who I at this point realized was the store owner, continued to grin at me as I turned to look at her. She reached her frail fingers forward and brushed my cheeks; damn these bridal tears! “You look very beautiful, miss,” she said happily.

“That’s the dress,” Hannah nodded.

I stared at myself in the mirror again, mesmerized by the way my hands were trailing over the skirt and up to my hips. It was perfect. It was absolutely perfect. But a quick glance at the numbers trailing along the tag brought me crashing back down to reality.

“It really is beautiful,” I conceded, turning back to Ida. “But I just don’t know that I can afford it.”

Kara started blubbering, and Hannah looked as if I had just slapped her in the face. “But Anne! That is THE wedding dress!” she argued. “Stop being so frugal and let yourself be happy!”

I shook my head, offering Ida a watery smile before rushing back into the dressing room. Crying seemed to be quickly becoming a bad habit of mine, but I held in my sad sobs as I carefully peeled the gown from my body. I laid it gently on the couch in the corner and slid into my own clothes, casting longing looks back at the fabric. It was pitiful, really. I’d become a twenty-five year old woman mourning a dress worse than any former relationship and crying in a dressing room.

Kara kept babbling at me through the curtain, trying to tell me over and over again just how gorgeous the gown was, how amazing it had been, and how lucky it was that the first dress I tried on had been so perfect. Because I didn’t already know the painful irony of how nothing else could compare.

She didn’t give up when I emerged back into the room either, and Ida gave me a sympathetic smile as the other women began to tidy up the other dresses we had looked through for the girls. Hannah was speaking fast and quiet in to her cell phone on the other side of the room, and when she heard me walk out, she stormed over to me. With a victorious smirk, she held the phone out to me.

“Listen,” she ordered. With a sigh, I pressed the phone to my ear.

“Hello?”

“Hey, sexy.” Brendon. Of course the traitor would call Brendon, the fiancée who insisted on being a sugar daddy. “I hear you found a pretty awesome dress.”

I glared at Hannah, who couldn’t seem to wipe off that awful smirk. “Brendon, don’t even—“

“My credit card is in your purse,” he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice. “I slipped it in there this morning when you were doing your make-up. Seriously, Annie, get it. What did I say about us having a kick ass wedding and you having to deal?”

I blinked and dug through my purse, groaning when I found the black card. “Brendon, you are such a shit.” I noticed Ida chuckling out of the corner of my eye. I shrugged apologetically.

“Hmm, I think that means ‘I love you’? I’m going to pretend it does.” Someone said something in the background, and Brendon laughed. “Yeah, totally, Spence. Listen, baby, please. Hannah told me how much you love that dress, and since I technically can’t see the thing until the wedding, I can’t very well march down there and buy it for you if you say no. But that doesn’t mean I won’t send Hannah or Kara on it, either.”

“Why are you doing this?” I moaned. “I feel so bad spending your money, Bren.”

“Well, it’s gonna be our money soon, isn’t it?” His voice was so light, so happy and in love, that I couldn’t help but smile softly. “Get the damn dress, Annie. Just make sure it’s easy to take off, if you know what—“

“Yeah, yeah, I get it.” I sighed and looked over at Hannah, nodding. She pumped her fist in the air in triumph, and gestured for Ida to grab the dress. I walked away a bit, for privacy’s sake.

“I’ll pay you back, okay?” I murmured into the phone. I could hear him about to protest, but I cut him off. “No, Bren, seriously. I don’t want this to become a thing, where I keep letting you buy me things.”

“Anne,” he said, his tone a new kind of serious. It sounded like he had moved for more privacy, too. “Our whole relationship the only things I’ve really bought you for things other than holidays were a pack of bubblegum and that ring on your finger. I love that you want to be independent, but baby, I really want to do this, okay? I want our wedding to be everything you ever dreamed of. I want to give you a fairytale.”

I smiled softly, picturing him leaning up against a wall and staring out the window in thought just like I was. “You gave me a fairytale the day you knocked over those apples, goofball,” I said.

He chuckled softly, and I held the phone closer, wishing very much he was there for me to hug. “Well, let me expand on the happily ever after a bit, then.”

“I’m buying the cake.”

“As long as it’s red velvet, be my guest.” There was more noise on the other line, and Brendon sighed. “Okay, Annie, I gotta go. We’re working on some songs and Dallon is getting antsy.”

I nodded, imagining the bassist’s hair flying every which way. “Okay. Thanks, baby. I love you.”

“I love you more. Now buy the damn dress!”

Hannah seemed very smug when I handed her back her phone, but I let it pass. Instead, I followed Ida to the register, giving her Brendon’s card and scheduling when my fittings should take place. I was in bliss when we walked out, imagining myself walking down the aisle, locking eyes with Brendon. Maybe he’d cry, seeing how beautiful I was. I kind of hoped he’d cry. That’d be adorable.

When my phone dinged, I pulled it out in a daze, still lost in my daydream as Hannah and Kara chatted around me. I unlocked my screen and was surprised to see a text from Pete. Opening it up, I held the phone closer to my face to read it better.

‘U busy? Bronx is here. Got Disney movies.’

I smiled and happily typed back. I hadn’t seen that little sucker for months. Brendon would probably be working late with the guys, anyway, and Hannah and Kara waved at me as they left to return to their significant others. I waved back, hitting the send button as I reached my car.

‘Be there in 10. You damn well better have Aladdin.’

‘Bitch, plz.’