What a Wonderful Caricature of Intimacy

I was still on Brendon's porch. I was crying, my breath coming out in loud bursts. All I could feel was pain. Not physical pain, but emotional pain.

I heard the door open.

"Jenny," said Brendon. "You need to go. You can't stay here."

I let out a sob. I didn't know where to go. I stayed where I was.

I felt a hand wrap around my arm. I pulled my arm away from the hand.

I heard a sigh.

"Jenny," Brendon said again. "Go home."

Home. That's where I could go. I got up slowly and grabbed a hold of the railing on the porch to steady myself. I did this without looking at Brendon. I didn't want to see him. I stumbled down the two steps connected to the porch and rushed to my car, trying not to trip. But I had no luck. I tripped a few feet away from my car, landing on my hands and knees. I stayed there for a moment before getting back up and closing the gap between me and my car. I got in and started my car quickly, backing out of Brendon's driveway as fast as I could. I had to stop my car a little ways away though. I was still crying and it was hard to see.

When I came to a stop, all I could do was cry and clutch at my chest. I was in so much pain. It was all my fault. I wish I had known Ryan's true feelings before hurting someone who actually loved me.

I was suddenly interrupted by knocking on my window.

"Go away Brendon," I managed to say. I let out a sob. Brendon knocked on my window again. "Bren--!"

I stopped what I was saying as soon as I looked up and saw who it really was. It was Ryan. I just stared at him.

"Open the door," Ryan said. I didn't move. "Please?"

I slowly opened my door. When it was open, Ryan kneeled down next to me. His hand instantly went to my face, wiping away my tears. I realized I had stopped crying. It probably had something to do with Ryan being there. It had surprised me so much.

"What are you doing here?" I finally asked.

"I need to tell you something," Ryan said. "You left before I even had a chance to reply to what you said."

"I think your reaction was a clear enough reply," I spat.

"Well it wasn't," Ryan said. "I had to think about my answer."

"You shouldn't have to think about whether or not you love me," I said.

"Well, I did," Ryan said. "Our entire relationship has been based on my revenge. All I've been thinking about is my revenge. I had to think about times when we weren't dealing with my plan."

"So, what?" I said.

"I love you," Ryan said, reaching up and placing his hands on either side of my face. I couldn't say anything now. I didn't know what to say.

"Jenny," Ryan said. "Please say something. I'm so sorry I hurt you earlier.. I didn't mean to. I really truly love you."

I placed my hands on top of Ryan's. I stared into his eyes for a moment before I pulled his hands off of my face.

"I need to think about it," I said quietly. "Can I come see you tomorrow night?"

"Yeah," Ryan said, smiling. He stood up. "Of course."

"Ok," I said. "I'll see you tomorrow."