Diary of a Reluctant Ruler

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With Olly’s dress designs revealed, we quickly turned to fitting and making the dresses. Being poked with a thousand pins for half an hour at a time, only to discover that it had to be done all over again a day later once one seam had been sown in, wasn’t exactly my idea of fun. But then, Olly was the one doing the poking, so it was at least mildly entertaining.

Caroline had quickly redesigned her own dress, thinking that the long cream dresses looked far superior to her own A-line cut. Even I could see at a glance that the long dress would make her look short and - dare-I-say - fat, next to Cecilia and Theresa’s slim, tall figures. But she would have her own way, and Olly set to making her a similar dress, secretly making some small adjustments to the bodice in order to stop Caroline from looking too much like a mushroom.

Mushroom or meringue…

Tough choice.

Definitely meringue if I had to eat her.

Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that…

Meanwhile, our renovations of the West Wing were coming along well. We’d put in some new oak floors, rebuilt the foundations for the terrace around the far edge, had brought in a specialist to recreate the glass house which had faced onto the back of the wing until the early 19th century, when one of the old oak trees had fallen down in a storm. We’d also begun to decorate the first story rooms, which had already been in a fairly well-kept state. The master bedroom and adjoining bedrooms needed fresh coats of paint, so we raided a hardware shop for paint samples, which shortly adorned the walls in a variety of rainbow colours.

“What on earth is this?” Olly asked, coming in to see our work one day.

“They’re paint samples,” James replied, looking up at the patches of paint on the walls.

“Why are they grouped in such random patterns?” Olly questioned.

“Different colour schemes,” James replied again, coming away from the white cloth he’d just spread over one of the sideboards.

“You want to put robin egg blue with bluebell blue?” Olly looked at me as if James had caught a tropical disease.

“Erm, yes?”

“My god, you two must be colour blind!” she cried, “It doesn’t work!”

“Really?” I asked, “Really really?”

“Yes, really!”

“Aw, but they look right…” James moaned.

“Use one of those colour match brochures for heaven’s sake,” Olly said, shoving one into her brother’s hand.

James sat down on a white-sheet-covered settee to look at one for a moment, with a look of incredulity on his face.

“Why has it got blue with brown?” he asked after a moment.

“Because believe it or not, they complement each other,” Olly said.

“Right…”

I walked across to peer over James’ shoulder.

“Ooo, I like that one,” I said, pointing to a pale blue and brown combination which reminded me of sandy beaches.

“Really? Kinda… drab, don’t you think?” James asked, “How about that?”

He pointed to a dark teal and deep green combination.

“Too dark,” I replied good-humouredly.

“Go for the section classified ‘warm’,” Olly advised, stalking out with a paint brush.

“Warm, eh?” James said, flicking over the page.

“How about some crumpled linen?” I asked, pointing at one range of browns.

“Crumpled linen?” James repeated, raising one eyebrow, “Beware, Miss Caramont, that sounds like an invitation for a sexual liaison!”

“That’s not what I meant!” I cried, hitting him.

“Maybe not consciously,” James replied, mischievously.

He kissed me in a defiantly passionate manner which left my toes tingling. I attempted to kiss him some more, but he remained defiantly aloof and walked away as he read out further colour combinations, all of which made me want to tackle him quite suddenly.

“Velvet touch,” he murmured.

“Yes please,” I replied, throwing myself down on the settee in what I hoped was an alluring manner.

“Sweet sundae,” he continued, walking behind me.

“Mmmm,” I giggled.

“Wild water,” he announced, leaning down beside me.

I simply caught my breath, observing the slope of his shoulder blades, and the tension in his lower arm as he held his weight off my body.

“Silken sunrise.”

He trailed a delicious finger from his free hand up the inside of my arm.

“Blue seduction,” he whispered, leaning so close that I could feel his breath against my chin.

“That’s a fresh shade, I thought I told you to – Argh!” Olly attempted to shield her eyes across the room. I giggled helplessly, my stomach contracting with laughter. James caught it, and stifled a laugh as well.

“My god, you’re turned on by colours?!” Olly cried, still attempting to avert her gaze, “This is so wrong!”

Unable to find anything remaining to look at, Olly left in embarrassment.

“Sorry!” we both yelled after her, still laughing.

“I wonder what the rich category has to offer…” James said after a moment.

“Stop it!” I cried, giggling, as he began to bombard my senses with ‘rich pralines’ and ‘exotic spices’. I kissed him to stop him talking, which seemed to help a little…

Half an hour later and we managed to return to the choosing of colours without being too distracted.

By the end of January we had the first floor rooms finished, and the master bedroom, perhaps unsurprisingly, contained several shades of velvet touch, and one of starlit night.