You're Still My Favorite Melody

Parties used to be enjoyable for me. But lately parties had driven me to my wit’s end and this one was no different.

Pete had dragged me to one of his friend’s parties, saying that I needed to relax for a bit. Sure at first the atmosphere of the party helped me forgot, but soon enough, Pete had abandoned me–it was his nature– and I was sitting alone with a drink in my hand.

Staring into the depths of the half-empty bottle –I was a pessimist today– did nothing to clear my head and so I took a swig from the bottle. I sighed in distaste at not only the beer’s flavor –I wasn’t much of a drinker– but also at the confusion that clouded my mind. What was I to do?

William was my best friend turned boyfriend and I didn’t want to leave him. But then there was Gabe and I couldn’t ignore him. I was sure that he was the kind of problem that didn’t go away. I loved William–of that I was sure– but things with Gabe were not so lucid. William was the perfect boyfriend and the perfect friend and Gabe well... he was flawed to say the least.

The choice seemed like an easy one to make, but somewhere along the way Gabe had stopped being so disposable. William had become the underdog, fighting to hold on to something he already had.

I’m so lost in my own cluttered thoughts that I almost don’t hear William say my name. I look up, momentarily distracted and smile up at him. He returns the smile uncertainly and sits down next to me.

“What are you doing here?” he asks and I can’t help but notice the distance between us. What had we become?

“Pete, he told me I should come, but he tends to disappear...” I trail off, glancing back down at the bottle.

“Are you drinking?” he asks, surprise in his voice. I shrug and William grabs the bottle, his palm covering mine.

“You shouldn’t,” he mumbles, drawing his hand away.

“Too late for that right?” I say, choking out a humorless laugh.

“I know that we’re not in the best place right now, but no matter what happens, I’ll still love you the same,” he says, but he still doesn’t touch me or move any closer.

I wouldn’t blame him if he hated me. I mean, I hated myself right now. I don’t know what to say anymore. Because maybe I don’t love him, at least not in a romantic way. And until I figured that out, I didn’t want to tell him something that might not be true.

“I’ll see you on Thursday Bill,” I mumble, taking my beer and heading towards the kitchen.

Thankfully the kitchen is deserted, so I hop up on the counter and text Pete about William's surprise appearance. He replies with an apology and I reply with an sad face, before grasping the neck of the bottle again.

“You’re drinking?” a voice asks and I slam the bottle down on the counter top.

“Yes I am,” I hiss and Gabe looks down at his feet.

“Sorry,” he mumbles. I look up at Gabe in surprise, he was sorry?

“Out of all of the horrid things you’ve done to me, this is what you’re sorry for?!” I exclaim and Gabe looks up from his feet, his brow furrowed.

“I hope you’re happy. William won’t even touch me,” I continue, looking back down at my now vibrating phone. From Pete: Where are you? I text back my location and glance back at Gabe’s guilt ridden face.

“I can’t pretend like there’s nothing here,” he retorts, as Pete and then William walk into the kitchen.

“Why can’t you? You and Pete have been trying to destroy my relationship with William ever since it started, so I think the least you could do is pretend!” I shout. Pete spots the beer immediately and pours it down the sink, after shooting me a disapproving look.

“There are a lot of reasons that you should be yelling at him, but this is not one of them. Stop playing all these fucking games and choose one, because you can’t have them both. I won’t let you do that to them,” Pete hisses, before stalking out of the room. And then it’s just the three of us, standing around rather uncomfortably.

“I’m gonna go uh find out what his deal is,” Gabe mumbles , before walking out of the room in search of Pete.

“Let me take you home,” William says and it’s not really a question, so I follow him outside.