@ ThatGirlThatWrites I asked them not to, but I'll send them your way if any show up. :) & oh yay. Let me know what you think on there or in a comment on my profile, I don't want to run up the comments on this review.
@ PoeticMess. Yeah I am not a big fan of One Direction, but If anyone sends you those, I'll take them lol. && no but I just finished writing on one of my stories, so I am about to (:
@ PoeticMess. I know right?? I feel the same way (: On the most I've read I really don't have anything bad to say. This one was the only one I tried to make any corrections. They were all good. (: Which I just love reading anything really.
@ ThatGirlThatWrites It probably just fits her style better. It's hard to write using other people's styles. I couldn't do it. Mine's too different than a lot of other people's. I actually started my reviews tonight too, since I'm heading out of town on Saturday until Tuesday and promised to get them all done by Friday. Dx
@ PoeticMess. Yeah I get what you're saying. (: I messaged her and told her to look at your comment and the way you wrote it too. I have a feeling with the way she wrote she might like it better!
@ ThatGirlThatWrites No problem. :) I'm really good at this grammar schtuff. & yeah, sometimes things need to be split to sound better, but from that one sentence, I think it'll sound good if there's just more commas. That's how my writing style is anyways, I write a lot of sentences like the one I commented last time.
"With fingers like stone, she fumbled with the buttons on her jacket, trying to pry the stubborn material from her body."
I find my self writing a lot of verbs after commas to keep the sentence flowing without having to disconnect and create another one. Eh. I just like it better when it's connected.
@ PoeticMess. Oh, yes!! Thank you for catching that. (: Yeah, she does need to use more commas. I just thought it might sound better if it wasn't all one sentence. But then again that works too!
Hey dude. :) Actually, "Trying to pry the stubborn material from her body." isn't a complete sentence, so it would have to stay, "With fingers like stone, she fumbled with the buttons on her jacket, trying to pry the stubborn material from her body."
Honestly, that whole thing could stay one sentence, she just needs commas before "trying" and "but".
I asked them not to, but I'll send them your way if any show up. :) & oh yay. Let me know what you think on there or in a comment on my profile, I don't want to run up the comments on this review.