Respect - Comments

Has anyone ever sat her down and thoroughly asked why she disrespects you and only you? From a child psych perspective, and just a child perspective in general, it sounds like a classic case of "Your presence threatens the presence of the mother role in my life and I already have a mom but you're with my dad and I'm at a pre-pubescent age where I'm developing and not cognitively understanding things and I could be feeling my dad likes you more than me, you could be replacing my mother, and/or I feel uncomfortable by this situation."

Has your boyfriend sat down with her and talk to her? If he has that's one thing, if not that could be another. Also just the general possible notion that if he and her biological mother are not on good terms, she could be saying such things to fuel this ideology in her head which can throw a wrench into...everything.

Yeah...talk to her and get her to open on an emotional level first (if this hasn't already been done) before looking into ways to reprimand her (which should be done if this conversation has taken place and she's still acting out).

@ ugly lights
Girl that has to be it. Like there's no question about it, I've gone through it...it's like no fun.

@ Ruby Salazar
She saw her mom a few weekends ago and I guess has been messaging her on facebook when we're at a friends house. So it makes me wonder what's being said.

and your fine, i promise!!

@ ugly lights
Does she visit her mom too? Maybe that could be another thing...like there have been cases where bitter baby mother's will tell their children to be mean to their ex's gf/bf because he/she is trying to take your father away from me and you.

Perhaps? Please let me know if I'm reaching and should kindly shut up. (I was going through something similar to this)

@ Wild Hero Hina
That would make sense. She doesn't see her mom anymore since Josh has had to deal with CPS every time she's gotten back from her mom's. but she does talk to her mom once in a while on facebook so it makes me wonder what's being said. I just hope it gets better eventually or i'm not sure how much longer i'll be able to deal with it.

Yep because both of my cousins have expressed that despite how bad things were in between my aunt her ex/their dad, they wished their mom and dad were still together. Part of me thinks that your bf's ex/the daughter's mom is probably telling her to act this way or something because if your bf's ex is one of those crazy exes (the kind that try spiting their own exes yet try manipulating them back into a relationship), I wouldn't doubt that she's jealous of you and your bf so she's trying to get the daughter to be rude to you and maybe siphon information about you guys from her. It's just a wild guess right now but most of the time in the case of divorced/split parents, kids will act out and won't know how to react to thier parents no longer being together.

@ Wild Hero Hina
You know, I never took into consideration that her parents being split up might be why she's acting the way she is. That would make sense. Yelling doesn't work, I know that lol. Her dad doesn't raise her to be an asshole at all either, so it just doesn't make sense. It's ridiculous.

tbh, your bf's daughter is starting to sound so much like my littlest cousin (who is coincidentally turning 9 this coming october) at least where her attitude towards everyone (related to her or close to her/our family) is concerned. Because unless you're doing exactly as she wants or you catch her in a bad mood (which would be 88% of the time when I was staying with my aunt last fall), she'll be a rude and bratty and mean. Not saying my little cousin is all of these intentionally but her parents being split up has a huge impact on her. Anywho, if spanking or yelling (though i dont condone yelling at a kid because it makes things worst), doesn't work, you and/or your bf should try putting her time out and like what someone said in one of your other blogs, take away her favorite things until she can rein in her attitude. Putting my cousin in the corner seems to have a huge impact on her attitude though.

@ Ruby Salazar
Sometimes I wonder if that's the case. It just gets old. You should've seen her when I tried getting her out of bed this morning. She was mouthy again. I mean she does apologize but it just feels like a never ending cycle.

@ ugly lights
But like why? Does she get jealous a lot because her father is always with you?

@ Ruby Salazar
Yes, shes horrible to me when her dad isn't around. That's why I never try to do anything with her because her attitude to me is always nasty. I'm hoping eventually it'll get better, but yikes. if I acted like she did, my mom would've had my head lol

@ ugly lights
And she keeps doing it? Lordt, this is why my parents spanked the shit out of me.

@ Ruby Salazar
seriously! but he doesn't take it, he yells at her all the time lol. But she just doesn't know when to stop.

Girl what's worse is that the parents let them be like that.