“You’re 14 years old,”
Yes, I do, in fact, know how old I am dear parents. Thank-you for pointing that out to me. Again.
“I do not support the pill,”
Erm … that’s all very nice, but I wasn’t asking if I could go on the farking pill. Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure I haven’t exactly kissed anyone properly yet, I don’t think I’m going to be fucking anyone any time soon. (:
“I was uncomfortable with you being at his house without his parents home; not because he would’ve harmed you, just because I find it unacceptable and wouldn’t allow you and a boy here without me or your dad. Do you understand?”
Fuck are you on about? Unacceptable? Since when are you catholic? No I do not understand … nothing happened. What the hell are you talking about?
All I asked was a simple question. A simple question: “Mum, how old do you have to be to … you know, go to the chemist to get piercings without adult permission?”
I didn’t mean for mum to get all … “*huff* I DO NOT SUPPORT YOU.” Yeah, I don’t want your support; I want to get a piercing myself.
“Don’t rush into things,” DAD. I have wanted my lip pierced for about a YEAR now. I’m not rushing into anything, don’t worry. You CAN take piercings out in case you didn’t realise …
“If you get too many piercings you look ugly,” Mum mum mum shut up. I only want snakebites, that is ALL. Oh wow I have two piercings in my lobes and a stud in my helix. May I remind you that I did the helix piercing myself? I did it myself in one of my crazy moments. Would you rather me have another insane moment and shove a stud through my lip, or me going to get it pierced professionally? I think we know the answer right here …
What I don’t understand are parents. Sure, I accept that I am young. I know mum and dad only want the best for me; they don’t want me to screw myself over. But I promise not to go over the top and completely fuck myself up.
Onto more situations … what a fucking joke. Jackson completely got my hopes up before cutting me down bad. He’s moved onto my best friend, again. He never liked me; he only wanted someone to kiss. And when he had no patience with my … unknowledgeable self in the kissing department, he screwed me over and left to cassie. If cassie was a real friend, she’d ignore him. But no. She keeps texting him … and not telling me anything he’s saying. Not to mention apparently year 12 ben (who’s not in year 12 anymore) wants to fuck her. Everyone always wants cassie. I’m not good enough for anyone. I am always the second best. Second best josie. Second hand josie. Side liner, benchwarmer josie. While reading the start of Angus, Thongs and Full Frontal Snogging, it was making me feel better since the character couldn’t get anyone either. Then it just became unfair and she was picking up with 3 different guys, plus getting the really gorgeous band member. Way to make me feel a lot better, ay. Then because I didn’t want to call cassie, she was calling me a bitch and crying. I love her to death, but does everything always have to be about her? She can make me smile as soon as I talk to her, but sometimes I want to be by myself, without the phone glued to my ear. I cry as well, I fail life more than her, I don’t get spoiled as much as her, I do not get my own way as she does. I do not get boys like she does. Oh wait. I get no boys. I get the sophisticated gay acting ones, the ranger up himself pedophiles and the get arounds. I couldn’t even get Jeremy for fucks sake, JEREMY.
Besides, I was the one who made her into who she is ... she wants to get her lip pierced now. Before I met her, she thought piercings and tattoos were ugly as shit. I ... maybe I'm saying this out of jealously or something, but I really don't think she'd suit a lip piercing. We were screwing around with little silver beads, like sticking them onto our faces with lipgloss, and ... I don't know, I just think cassie's mouth is too big to suit it. Idk, I probably look like a retard with snakebites, but she definitely doesn't suit them. :(
*huff* Okay … let’s have a happy moment for a while, shall we? On … Sunday (?), after that brilliant night with James and Lenny (and lenny’s pov cream coloured car with the squishy seats, and his better than average driving) and Corey and Tom, Cass and I went to the plaza to complete a few things off our Summer Holidays list. We couldn’t sit at Donut King, since they were packing up, but we did manage to get a packet of chewing gum. On the way to my ice cream shop, we put the whole packet - 14 pieces - of wriggley’s tropical extra gum (it’s the most disgustingest chewy flavour ever, DO NOT BUY) in our mouths. Farrrk it was really hard to get it all in … and gross. :( Some old ladies gave me weird looks when we spotted ‘E W’ printed into the concrete and I wrote ‘UM’ in front of it. UM EW. Hello? It makes more sense than just EW. *eye roll* Anyway, when we got to the shop we attempted to blow bubbles with the massive gum … ball we had. -_- I swear, I almost passed out and choked it was so fucking hard to get even a small bubble. Haha we then stuck our chewy to a pole in the car park out the back of the shop. They’re still there I’m pretty sure … ew we’re freaks. :(
God why is this taking so long to download? Okay … well at least Limewire is finally working now. I downloaded about 60 songs today plus Yes Man. Jebus, that didn’t take like … all day. Anyway, now I’ve decided to download Hot Rod. Hahahaha. Hot Rod is so stupidly funny. It’s too bad jackson was the one who made me watch it in the first place. -_- Hopefully it’s done before dad kicks me off. Oh wow. Hot Rod’s already at 15% with only about 3 hours left to download. Yay. *sigh* Some how I find myself also downloading Twilight. Why … I don’t know. >:(
*le sigh* Jackson just asked me to send him a dollar, I did. There he goes, probably texting cassie already. Yeah, apparently he likes me more than her. Oh yes, there’s the message … ‘Thank you so much you’re the best! What are you doing? xxo’ Oh, now he feels he has to talk to me, just because I sent him a dollar credit. Fuck why am I talking back to him? Long pause where he’s texting cassie … new message for me: ‘Yeah I’m just watching tv.. I’m so bored xxo’ Pause … oh what is this? No message for me. Pushed to the side again. No, he’d rather cassie. My best friend. The lying best friend. Fuck she annoys me when she lies about her age and what she’s done with a guy. No, cassie you half fuck, you have not given anyone a blow job. You didn’t even prolly know what that was before I told you. No you have not been licked out by anyone. Yes, you didn’t know what that was either, did you? Oh, I’m sorry I fucked up that kiss with jackson, it’s not that I haven’t like … not kissed anyone before in my whole entire life, I’m sorry I tell people that I haven’t kissed anyone. I’m sorry I told jackson I didn’t know how to kiss. I wasn’t going to look like a stupid half-wit if he was gonna try kiss me again. Besides, I needed a reason to be pulling away from him TWICE. Oh, twice ay … he only tried to kiss me twice, ran out of patience, then made an excuse that he didn’t want a girlfriend just yet. I never said I wanted to go out with him. I didn’t want to be locked to him either. He was the one always half-inviting himself to things, not letting up until we said he could come. I’m sorry, jackson, for telling you that you shouldn’t come to retro after you basically dumped me. Oh and I’m also sorry for having feelings and being upset. Of course I wasn’t going to actually say how I was feeling, bastard. And of course cass, I don’t feel anything when you’re telling me that you had to lie to him to say that you couldn’t go out with him tomorrow. I feel bloody good and fine I do. Because I’m just the doll on the swing, being hardly acknowledged by the tree I’m hanging on.
Fucking hurry up and finish downloading … x_x Also thanks to jackson, I’ve fallen in love with mayday parade .. (: Miserable at Best is amazing. So is Three Cheers for Five Years. <3 And something must have punched out my brain because I now love The Call by Regina Spektor … or the end song from Prince Caspian. -_\\
*cries* I just feel so emotional right now I want to cry but I’m too dead to make my eyes blink … I’m gonna finish iTunes, dry sob about life for a few minutes then wait for Hot Rod to finish downloading … goodnight. xo
(Oh sure, text me after cassie’s gone to bed, jackson. Thanks you make me feel like I really still should be alive …)
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