It's been hard ....

I broke up with my boyfriend through text yesterday, because he's been wanting to break up with me, but hasn't ... so instead, he had been ignoring me for a month. Even after the text, we still haven't talked, no words spoken, not even eye contact. I occasionally look over at him when he's not looking but that's it.

It's been hard, it's been hard for a month, but now it's finally 'final' that I feel upset and sad. I wasn't even this sad when he wasn't talking to me. Maybe now that we've broken up, that I'm so ... I don't know.

i haven't been sleeping well, and before we broke up, I had been having dreams where I think he's texted or talked to me on MSN, so I wake up and check, and it's been fake, and then I try and sleep again. I do, but not well. And now at least I have the biggest mood swings because I'm super happy one moment, and then I get a glimpse of him, and then get sad but then forget and get happier etc. I don't think my friends know what to do with me except give me sympathy hugs.

Well I finish high school in approximately 10 weeks, and then exams and he moves back to Adelaide (I live in Melbourne) and I'll never see him again (unless he gets into Melbourne Uni ....which means he stays, which would be bad) .... so maybe then, when he's out of sight, he'll be out of my mind.