i'm all in.

Sam walked into the house he'd been living in for the last year wishing still, he had found an answer to how to get Dean back. He knew it wasn't exactly something that was done every day, so actually finding an answer was hard and he didn't feel like he'd gotten any closer to figuring it out than when he started. He did have to admit though that he was glad he had Catriona in his life. Because she had been very helpful in keeping him sane over the last year. It was just hard losing Dean and then finding out Dean's girlfriend was expecting a baby. Even harder when he tried everything he could to keep in touch with Bailey and help her out in any way he could but she wouldn't let him. Because she just kept distancing herself more. And all he could do now was hope that Dean would find a way back, and that Bailey and the baby were okay.

---

Bailey walked into the kitchen to fix a bottle for her baby who she adored more than anything else in the world. It was hard not having the baby's father around, and she would've given anything to have Dean around, but she wasn't sure that was possible. She could've figured it out probably if she'd asked his brother Sam, but honestly, she didn't know if Sam would've given her a straight answer. Plus with all the shit they deal with she wasn't sure she could handle whatever answer he would've given her. And honestly, she felt it was probably best to raise her child away from the world they lived in; or she at least hoped it would be away from the terrifying world the brothers lived in.

Sam Winchester came into Catriona's life when she least expected it. Truth be told, she'd been a pretty dark place when it had happened, and she was pretty damn grateful that he'd walked into her life, literally, when he had. She'd been picking out some books in library for her class of rambunctious kindergartners when she bumped into him. She wasn't kidding when she said he'd walked into her life. He had literally walked right into her. In that moment, she hadn't really thought anything of it. He'd been extremely apologetic, and she'd shrugged it off, however she supposed someone had wanted more to come out of it because she saw a few days later at the bar she worked at on the weekends. Teaching was her passion, but it didn't pay nearly as well, and it certainly didn't pay her enough to live comfortably. So, she picked up a few shifts on the weekend at one of the local bars. It all was sort of history from there on out. He'd shown up close to closing time, and when he realized this, he'd been extremely apologetic yet again. She'd smoothly told him that she'd forgive him if he bought her a drink. Truth be told, she might have taken a few shots to help her get through the remainder of her shift that evening, and liquid courage might have done all the talking, but it was that liquid courage that helped lead to the relationship with her now boyfriend.

"You make me feel so lazy." She said, stifling a yawn as she walked over to him, still in her pajamas. It was a Sunday, and Sunday was her only day off from both teaching and bartending. Sometimes she spent the morning sleeping in and worked on lesson plans in the afternoon or graded some assignments, and other times she lazed about most of the day. On that particular morning she was thinking of staying in her pajamas all day. Maybe she'd do some grading later but for right now she was perfectly content with the idea of curling up on the couch with a cup of tea, a good book, and her amazing boyfriend. "You didn't go for a run. What were you doing out so early?" She asked curiously, noting that he wasn't in athletic attire and that he was actually fully dressed despite the somewhat early hour.

---

The first person that came to mind when Dean appeared in that forest in Maine was Sam. The second person was Bailey. And the third person was Castiel. The mere thought of the angel caused his stomach to twist into knots. He was still in purgatory. He had chosen to stay behind. Dean should have expected that he would pull a stunt like that one, but he hadn't. Freaking selfless asshole. For right now Dean knew that there was nothing that he could do. He needed to get a hold of his brother to tell him he was alive. And he needed to do the same thing with Bailey. Bailey. She was the one good thing amongst all of the fucked up shit that went on in his life. And he'd pretty much abandoned her. Not that he'd meant to. He hadn't realized that sending Dick Roman's ass to purgatory would mean getting himself and Castiel dragged there as well. He had never planned on leaving her. Not after he'd already done that once before when he'd gone to hell. But he had, and he needed to find her. He needed to see her.

He knew that Sam would understand, and what his brother didn't know wouldn't hurt him anyway, so the first thing he did was try to locate her. It proved to be harder than he thought that it would be. She'd moved away in the last year, not that he really blamed her for that or anything, but thankfully she was still under Bailey Anders. The apartment complex seemed nice enough. It was in a good neighborhood. Quiet, safe. All good things, and as he made his way down the hall to apartment 5B he didn't think he'd been more eager and nervous for anything in his life. When did you become a freaking teenager? Man up, Winchester. He mentally scolded himself as he reached up to knock on the door.

Sam laughed and wrapped his arm around Catriona kissing the top of her head with a smile when she'd walked up to him. For a moment he was a little shocked that she was there in the house in her pajamas, but then he quickly remembered that it was Sunday and that Sundays were her off days. And even though she didn't usually have plans to go anywhere she did often spend them grading papers or working on lesson plans. He didn't mind it, though, honestly, he admired how dedicated she was to make sure all of her students received a good education. And he was proud that he was dating someone who did care so much about others like she did.

"Yea I skipped my run this morning to head to the library extra early because there were just some things I felt like looking up," he told her wishing that he'd been more successful in his search. It was hard though to find much about Purgatory or at least hard to find actual reliable information, especially on the internet. So he'd, of course, decided to take up looking into books thinking it would help a little and so far it hadn't. Sam knew that he probably shouldn't even be worried about this right now because it was Dean and if anything Dean would find a way back to their world. He had, after all, came back from Hell. This time just felt different, though. The whole Hell thing had been thanks to Castiel; Sam knew that. And this time Dean wasn't in Hell he was in Purgatory a place Sam knew little to nothing about, and it wasn't like Sam had been able to get in touch with Cas to even see if he'd be able to help. So he was finally stuck realizing he was just going to have to wait and see what happened. Which wasn't what he wanted to do at all, but he wasn't sure what other options he had.

---

Bailey smiled down at her precious little girl who had fallen asleep, and she'd laid in the crib before turning on the baby monitor and then she quietly and slowly made her way out of the room so she could work on cleaning up the rest of the apartment. It was hard after all to find time to do anything when you were a single parent of a four-month-old. Especially when she didn't get nearly as much sleep as she would like because her daughter wouldn't sleep through the night yet, and she was slowly starting to worry about how she was going to stay finically stable. Sure right now everything was good, right now everything was fine money wise and all Bailey had to worry about was sleep. But she knew it wouldn't stay like this. Eventually, the money would run out, and she wasn't sure what she'd do then. Bailey did hope however that she had at least enough to last her a few more months so she'd have a little time to plan before everything just went to hell.

She let out a soft sigh when she heard the knock on the door; she hadn't been expecting anyone so she had no idea who could be knocking on her door right now, but whoever it was she did silently hope they didn't wake the baby. The person standing on the other side when she opened the door, however, was the last person she'd expected ever to see. And she wasn't exactly sure how to react. Her stomach felt like it was in knots, her heart was racing, and she was suddenly filled so so many different emotions that she honestly couldn't keep up with them all. "Dean," she finally said after who knew how long of just standing there staring at him.

"You're such a nerd." Catriona laughed, not even a little bit surprised that Sam had been at the library. That was where they'd first met after all. He went to the library pretty often, sometimes she went with him if she needed resources for future lesson plans, though she never really asked too much about what he was looking for. She didn't really know if it was the same thing every time or something different. All she knew was that sometimes he seemed to be in higher spirits than others. She couldn't really tell if that was the case right now though. "Did you find what you were looking for?" She asked curiously.

She wasn't going to ask him outright what he'd been researching at the library before 8AM on a Sunday, but she couldn't help being at least a little bit curious. There were certain topics that they both just chose not to bring up. She didn't mention his brother too much unless he wanted to talk about him and he never mentioned her ex unless she wanted to talk about him. His research and time at the library wasn't one of those topics that they didn't talk about, but he never really went into much detail about it either. Catriona sometimes wondered if it had something to do with his brother, but according to Sam he was dead, so that wouldn't make any sense, or would it?

---

Dean knew that she was surprised to see him. He knew that he had caught her completely off guard. He'd been in purgatory for about a year now. If she was this shocked to see him though it made him wonder if she and Sam had even tried to get him back. He didn't want to start an argument, he really didn't, but the thought did cross his mind. The other thought that crossed his mind was where the hell was his brother? Dean had hoped that Sam would take care of Bailey, protect her in case some evil son of a bitch decided to go after her because of her connection with the two brothers, and he supposed he had a few bones to pick when he saw his brother again.

"You moved." He said simply, stepping into her apartment without even asking if he could come in. She'd been his girlfriend for crying out loud, and he knew that it had been a year, but did he need permission to come inside? He didn't think so. "I kind of expected Sam to be here." He added as an afterthought as he took in his surroundings before settling back onto her. She was still as beautiful as he remembered her, though there was something different about her and he couldn't quite figure out what that something was. "Did you cut your hair or something? Something's different about you."

"But you love it," Sam said with a laugh. He did figure that his girlfriend who was a teacher could appreciate his inner nerd. "No I didn't actually," he said wishing he could've said yes I found everything I needed and now it's time for me to get my brother back. Or even yes now I need to inform Bailey of what's going on. Because he was sure that if he were to figure out how to bring Dean back, Bailey would want to know; She'd been his girlfriend after all, and she'd had Dean's baby which meant something else. But he couldn't say those things because they weren't true. He'd hadn't figured out a damn thing and was still unsure of how to bring Dean back. He also wasn't even sure where Bailey was. He'd tried to stay in touch with her because he knew Dean would've wanted him to do anything and everything to protect her from everything in the world. But she'd pulled away and would ignore him when he called her.

Thinking on it Sam was sure it wouldn't be that hard to find her, after all, tracking people down was one of the many things that he was a pro at, however, he hadn't tracked her down. "I know today is your off day but do you think you could help me with something?" He asked deciding kind of on the spot that he was going to track Bailey down. And once he found her he would call or visit or something because he did want to make sure she was okay, and he felt like Catriona should be involved since she was a part of his life and he didn't want to keep things from her.

---

Bailey wasn't all that taken back when Dean just walked in without being invited. That was just Dean, and clearly even after a year of being where he'd been this last year he hadn't changed much. What took her back the most though was that he was there, back from the dead if you wanted to put it that way. Honestly, Bailey wasn't sure where he'd been this last year, Sam hadn't exactly told her when she'd asked him about what happened. Well, he had told her something, but it hadn't been the answer she'd wanted because it had gotten her nowhere.

"Clearly me moving didn't stop you from finding me," Bailey said closing the door and turning to look at Dean, "Well Sam isn't here, and it's probably the lack of sleep finally showing up," she said rolling her eyes and trying to remain calm about this entire situation. Bailey would admit she was upset that Dean had just shown up after a year without telling her anything. Even though she knew, he hadn't had a choice when it came to leaving. And maybe she didn't have the right to be upset that he'd disappeared for a year, but she was. She'd spent the last year pregnant and worried. Not just for herself and the baby, but for Dean as well. And now he was just popping up like he hadn't been gone and honestly, she didn't know how to deal with it. She didn't know what to do now. "Sam doesn't know I'm here. Well not unless he's went searching for me," she said knowing that she should tell Dean about the precious little girl sleeping in the other room because that wasn't something she could keep from him, and he'd find out either way because Sam knew, and Sam was sure to mention it to him if she didn't. But she wasn't sure how he'd take it.

"This is true." Catriona laughed. Her boyfriend was definitely a nerd but she honestly was too. In her free time she would much rather be hauled up at home with a good book than out on the town somewhere, and, as a teacher, she loved doing research and finding new resources she could use in her classroom. While she enjoyed teasing Sam about being a nerd, she knew that she was just as guilty of being one as he was. "I'm sure you'll find whatever you're looking for eventually. You spend more time at that library than I do." She wouldn't ask him to tell her what he'd been looking for in the first place. If he wanted to tell her, then he would tell her. She saw no reason to pester him about telling her anything.

"Of course I can." She wasn't about to tell her boyfriend no. Sure, she had some lesson plans she could be working on, and she'd planned on being a bit lazy for the earlier portion of the day, but if Sam wanted her to help him with something then she would. It wasn't like he'd never done anything for her before. "Why don't we eat some breakfast first, and you can tell me whatever it is that you'll be needing my help with?" She suggested with a small smile.

---

Dean couldn't really tell if she was happy to see him or not. He was kind of getting the feeling that she wasn't or else she might have done something like jump his bones or kiss him senseless. This wasn't exactly the kind of reaction he was expecting from her, and he was honestly a bit taken aback to see the hint of anger in her eyes. He hoped that Sam had explained what had happened to him to her, but he almost couldn't tell anymore. He hadn't gone to purgatory on purpose. He hadn't expected to end being sucked there along with Cass and freaking Dick Roman, but he had been. It was completely out of his control, but he was back now, and shouldn't she at least be a little happy to see him right now?

"Why wouldn't Sam know where you are?" He asked, frowning slightly. Thankfully it didn't seem as though his brother had completely abandoned his girlfriend or anything like that. It almost seemed as though it was the exact opposite actually. "I'm going to be completely honest here and say that I wasn't expecting you to react the way that you are right now. You do realize that I never met to leave? It wasn't my decision."

"Breakfast sounds amazing right now," Sam said realizing that he hadn't eaten before he'd even left this morning and it was probably a good idea to eat something. Sometimes though he just got so sucked into the research he did that he forgot to do other things that were important, like eat for example. Figuring out how to find Dean and bring him back was important, though. Figuring out how to convince Bailey that she needed to stay closer to him so he could help keep her, and the baby safe was important. Some things were important, and he needed to get them done, because if he didn't do them, then no one would. So he was thankful that he had found someone who would and could help him.

"So I've told you about my brother, and well he had a girlfriend who was expecting a baby before he left. I don't think she ever got around to telling Dean about that. But anyways I haven't spoken to her in a while, and I know she moved before the baby arrived and I just wanted to find her so I could check in. Make sure she's okay and that the baby's okay you know?" He said pretty sure anyone would understand where he was coming from. It was after all his niece or nephew who was now probably four months old and Sam just wanted to know that everything was okay.

---

"I know that," Bailey said sighing and biting her lip. She knew it hadn't been Dean decision to leave. It had been made very clear to her that Dean's leaving wasn't something he'd planned or even wanted to do. Honestly, Bailey wasn't even sure why she was upset. "I'm sorry, I'm happy that you're back. It's just been hard this last year not having you around when I feel like I've needed you the most." She told him knowing that it probably sounded crazy and the first thing he was going to end up thinking was that she'd been attacked by something or someone, even though that wasn't true.

Bailey walked over to Dean and took his hand. "Sam doesn't know where I am because I ran. I need to show you something," she told him knowing it sounded crazy, and she might've been crazy running away from Sam so she could have a baby and try to raise it as far away from their life as she could. But that's what she did. Bailey didn't want to raise her daughter around vampires and werewolves and ghosts, and all the other insane things that Dean and Sam dealt with. Sure she wouldn't have run if Dean had still been around because the last thing she would ever even think about doing would be telling Dean he couldn't be a part of his own child's life. With him not around, even though she did think the world of Sam as well, she felt like she should start somewhere new. And maybe it hadn't been the best choice. But in her defense, she'd been pregnant, confused, and hurt because Dean was just gone all of a sudden.

"Come on then, I'll make pancakes." Catriona told him before taking his large hand in her much smaller one and leading him into the kitchen. She wasn't at all surprised that he'd forgotten to eat something this morning, it wasn't the first time she'd needed to remind him to eat because he'd gotten sucked into his research all of a sudden. She sometimes wondered if he'd remember to take care of himself in those instances if she wasn't around to do so. It did worry her, but Sam had been in a pretty dark place when they met too, and neither of them were in that place anymore. They had helped heal each other in more ways than one.

She nodded, indicating that she was listening as she grabbed everything from the pantry and the fridge that she'd need in order to make breakfast. It was one of those rare instances when Sam was mentioning his brother. He usually avoided talking about him for the most part, so she was a little taken aback to be completely honest. This was the first time she was hearing about his brother's girlfriend though. "Yeah, of course I understand that completely. Have you tried reaching out to her before now?" She asked him curiously as she started whipping up the pancake batter.

---

Dean was instantly concerned when she mentioned that the last year had been a hard one. "Did something happen? Did someone come after you? Was it Crowley? Because I'll find a way to gank his ass if it was." She didn't look hurt, but a lot could happen in a year, Dean knew that much. He and Sam honestly had other threats to worry about as well, but the King of Hell had been a constant thorn in their sides for a few years now, and he had a feeling that was going to be the case for a while now.

"You ran? What? Why would you run, Bailey? Sam would have taken care of you. You would have been safer with him than you've probably been on your own." He said, frowning slightly. He didn't understand what could have possibly caused her to run off like it seemed she had. He knew that she was okay now, but he didn't like the idea of her having spent the last year on her own up until this point. "Does Sam not know where you are at all? Bailey, you should have at least tried to stay in touch with him so that he knew where you were."

Sam followed into the kitchen where the breakfast was to be made, and while he let Catriona run around and pull the stuff out of the pantry for pancakes, he went right to the fridge for the bacon, which of course was turkey bacon. Sam had honestly spent so much of his time with Dean that he was still stuck on the idea that you couldn't have pancakes without bacon. Though Sam wasn't a big bacon fan because so he always opted for turkey bacon instead because he still got bacon with his pancakes and it was healthier. So it was a win-win situation.

"I have thought about it before now, but I guess I was just trying to give her space. I mean of course I had a hard time after losing my brother but I mean she was losing more than a brother. And I knew I didn't exactly want to be around anyone after it happened. So I didn't try hard enough to convince her to stick around so I could help where she needed me to. And then we just kind of lost touch and I've felt bad about it for a while now. But I think it's finally time I try and reach out to her again. I mean we've both had enough space to hopefully have healed enough to be able to talk right?" He asked wondering if she felt that maybe Bailey would have had enough time. Even though he knew, Catriona didn't know Bailey he was still hoping for an answer.

---

"Something happened yes, but it wasn't because someone came after me. And maybe we would've been safer with Sam, but what's done it done. Now just be quiet for a minute and follow me okay," she said leading him away from the living room and to the room where she'd put Rielle down for a nap. One she was hoping would be longer than her usual ones. Especially now that Dean was back, Bailey just wanted Rielle to sleep long enough for her to explain everything to Dean. Because well he was about to find out he had a daughter, which she was sure wasn't something he was going to take lightly.

Once they'd arrived at the door, she opened it slowly and then led Dean in and over to the crib. She wasn't entirely sure what she was expecting to happen, but she was about to find out. And she hoped he wouldn't be too upset with her about pretty much bailing on Sam the way she had. Because honestly, there was just so much to deal with when he'd disappeared it had felt like the right thing to do. Plus she knew Sam had been in a dark place after Dean left. They'd both been in a dark place, so splitting had made even more sense to her then, at least more than it made now.

Catriona wasn't at all surprised to see Sam pulling a package of turkey bacon out of he fridge. He loved bacon with his pancakes, but he was kind of a health nut and refused to eat too much greasy food. She teased him about it sometimes, though she never actually minded. She'd been eating a little bit better since they got together, and that became all the more true when they bought the house five months ago. They hadn't been together very long when it happened, and both of her parents had pointed that out to her when she told them what was happening, but she was a grown-ass woman and if she wanted to move in with her boyfriend then she could. And it was honestly one of the best decisions she'd made in a really long time. They might have only been together a little under a year now, but she loved Sam, she knew that she loved him, and she didn't regret anything that had happened in the last year.

"I think a year is more than enough time, and I'll help you find her. I'm sure that Dean would appreciate you wanting to do this." She told him with a smile as she started scooping batter out onto the skillet. "How hard could finding her possibly be? You and I both practically live at the library. I think with both of us doing a little research we should be able to find out where she is."

---

Dean had picked up on her use of the word "we" almost immediately. "Hold up, we would have been safer with Sam? Who exactly is "we", Bailey?" What the hell had happened in the last year? What exactly was he missing? He was pretty sure that there was a lot considering he had no freaking clue who she was referring to. Who else was living in this apartment with her? He might have been perceptive enough to pick up on that one, little word, but he sure as hell wasn't prepared, nor had he anticipated, what she would show him next.

He obliged when she told him to be quiet and allowed her to lead him to one of the bedrooms in the apartment. It didn't take him too long to figure out what was going on once he had entered the room. That didn't stop the jumble of thoughts in his head though as he tried to wrap his head around whatever the hell was happening right now. He looked into the crib and over to Bailey a couple of times before he spoke. "I--what--is this---what the hell is going on?" He stammered, taking a step away from the crib.

Sam smiled glad that she understood where he was coming from, not that he'd been worried or anything. "Honestly, if Dean knew I hadn't done everything in my power to keep her around he'd probably be pissed," Sam said knowing his brother and how he reacted to things. But there wasn't anything he could do about that now. He hadn't kept in touch with Bailey like he should have but he was going to hopefully find her and fix things. He just hoped she'd actually talk to him and let him help her.

"I thought so too. And hopefully between the two of us it won't be that hard to find her," he said pretty sure it wouldn't be. After all, he was pretty good at hunting people down and if he did by chance overlook anything then Catriona would be right there checking along side him. And Sam was pretty sure he was going to need help only because well Bailey had been around him and Dean long enough to pick up on things. Like how to keep herself hidden if she didn't want to be found. And Sam also knew that Dean had made sure she got the tattoo, and knew how to take care of herself were they ever to get separated. He just hoped they could find her and that everything was alright.

---

Bailey knew letting Dean know he had a daughter was the right thing to do, but she hadn't known how he was going to react. He had, after all, left not knowing she was pregnant so she was sure that him coming back to a baby wasn't exactly what he'd been expecting at all. She did silently pray however that it wouldn't change anything between them. They had been separated for the last year and Bailey hadn't moved on or found anyone else because well the only people she had in her heart were her daughter and Dean no matter where he was. She hadn't been able to get him out of her heart, even though she'd spent an entire year with no idea where he was or if she'd ever see him again. Which had caused some anger to arise, anger that wasn't Dean's fault she knew that but she'd felt abandoned even if he hadn't purposely.

"Shh, you're going to wake her and I just got her to sleep right before you showed up," Bailey whispered before she pulled Dean out of the room so they could talk a little bit louder. She was sure he had questions and she knew she had all the answers for him so they might as well talk about everything. "I found out a couple weeks before you disappeared that I was pregnant and I was going to tell you then but you were so busy with your case I hardly saw you. So I figured I'd wait until you wrapped everything up you know so you'd be even happier about the news. Only instead of you coming home for me to tell Sam showed up a total mess rambling on and on about how you and Cas were gone and he didn't know how to get you back. Which didn't make any sense, so he stayed with me I got him calmed down enough that he could actually tell me what happened. And from there I was a mess because I was expecting a baby and you weren't around and the last thing I wanted to do was raise a baby while I traveled with Sam looking for you. Because there was no telling what we might run into and I wasn't sure if I'd ever see you again. So I kind of pushed him away because I couldn't take it. And now here you are,"

"You were only giving her the space that she wanted. I'm sure your brother would understand that, babe." Catriona said. She obviously had never had the opportunity to meet Sam's brother, so maybe she was wrong, but she'd encourage her boyfriend and make him feel a bit better about all of this if she had to. She didn't want to agree with him and say that his brother would be pissed at him, and she figured going down this route was probably the better of the two options anyway. Comforting her boyfriend was much better than being an overtly blunt individual.

"We'll find her, I'm sure of it." Between the two of them she was certain that they'd be able to track down his brother's girlfriend. She didn't know if Sam was only going to try to contact her, or if he'd want to actually go out and physically find her, but she figured that could be determined once they found an address or a lead or something. Anything really that would help them track this woman down. "You're a good brother for wanting to do this, Sam." She assured him, squeezing his shoulder lightly as she brushed past him to get the syrup and butter from the fridge for the pancakes.

---

Dean was at a loss for words, and that wasn't something that happened very often. This was honestly the last thing he ever expected to discover when he tracked Bailey down. He really hadn't fully wrapped his head around this idea yet, and he hoped that an actually explanation from his girlfriend might help him mull things over a bit better. They had never talked about having kids. Hell, they had never really talked about settling down either. Sure, they'd been together for a few years now but Dean had always made it pretty damn clear that the apple pie life just wasn't for him. It just wouldn't work out, not with the kind of life that he lived.

Wordlessly he followed Bailey out into the hallway and allowed her to explain everything to him before he said anything. "Son of a bitch..." He mumbled to himself, running a hand through his cropped hair. He didn't know what to say to her, he really didn't. He was a father. Sure, there was a time when he'd thought that Lisa's kid Ben might have been his, but now he was faced with knowing that he actually had a kid that really was his, and he honestly didn't know what to make of it. "Does Sam know?" He finally asked her, unsure of what else to say.

Sam wasn't as sure that Dean would accept the situation. Of course, Sam actually knew Dean and knew how he was so it made sense that he'd think differently than his girlfriend who had never met his brother. He was thankful however that she was trying to be encouraging about everything. Honestly, he felt if he hadn't had her around in this last year he wasn't sure what he would've done or how things would've turned out; he could only imagine that they would've turned out awful, though. "I'm sure we will too," he said positive that between the two of them they actually could find her. He also secretly hoped that even though she'd moved away she hadn't moved too far away. Just so he wouldn't have ao travel far to see her because he did want to physically check in on her and all, plus if she was closer than he thought it'd be easy for Catriona to tag along. And maybe it was selfish of him to think that way, but he did.

"I've always tried to be a good brother," Sam said laughing a little. If she knew all the things he'd done to his brother throughout their life he felt like she wouldn't be saying that. And he didn't think that way because he felt he was a bad brother or because he wanted to be thought of as a bad brother. He thought that way because over their life Sam had done awful things to his brother, things that honestly made him feel like he was a bad brother. But no matter what he did or how badly it made him feel, he always tried to make it right. He always tried to overcome the shit they've waked through. Even though it was tough. And this was just another one of those things he wanted to make right. Because he may not know where Dean was exactly, or how to get him back, but he somehow knew deep in his gut that he'd see Dean again.

---

Bailey wasn't sure how Dean was going to react to this news. She'd known since almost the beginning of their relationship that he didn't exactly want children. Not because he didn't like them but because the life he lived wasn't an apple pie kind of life. And Bailey had come to accept that, mostly because she loved Dean and then after being on the road with him and Sam and figuring everything out that went on in their lives she didn't blame him. She also knew that she didn't want to bring a child into that life because it was dangerous and hard and would be too heartbreaking were something to go wrong, which was likely if there was a baby around given the baby would get the most protection since it would also probably be the number one target since they're so small and can't protect themselves. All of the things Dean feared and she had feared when she'd found out were why she'd tried to hide as well as she knew how once he'd disappeared.

"I know this isn't what you were expecting. And believe me, Dean, I didn't know what to do once you were gone. I contemplated giving her up for adoption, or if I should even have her at all. Because I was scared but at the end of the day I couldn't do either of those things." Bailey told Dean hoping that this was something he could get used to. Yea it was hard to wrap your mind around, and she wouldn't blame him if he needed time to figure things out. "Sam knows," she said softly. "I mean he doesn't know it's a girl because I left before she was born. But he knows." She added wishing now that all of this could've been differently and that the last year just could've never happened.

Catriona knew that in reality she and Sam hadn't known each other very long at all. She felt as though she had gotten to know him fairly well though in the year that they'd known each other and the seven months that they'd been together. She knew that, in the grand scheme of things, maybe their relationship was a bit rushed, but it felt right. They had both been in pretty dark places when they found each other, and they had helped the other out a great deal. After losing her fiancé the way that she had, Catriona was certain that she would never be happy again, but Sam had proved her wrong. She loved him, and she felt like she knew what kind of person he was. That was why she was almost certain that he had been a great brother to Dean. Even if she had never seen them together.

"I'm sure you did." She said, a small smile gracing her lips. "Come on, lets eat and then we'll start looking for Dean's girlfriend." She leaned up and a pressed a kiss to his cheek as she walked past and set the plate of pancakes down onto the table. She grabbed the syrup and butter from the fridge and set them down on the table as well before grabbing two coffee mugs from the cupboard and pouring two fresh, steaming cups of coffee for both of them. Good thing she'd put a fresh pot on moments before Sam had returned from the library.

---

Dean was still honestly at a loss. This was the last thing he was expecting to discover upon returning from purgatory. He'd expected to find Bailey and attempt to explain what had happened to him and Castiel and hope that she would forgive him. He knew that Sam likely hadn't had much of an answer for her as to where he'd gone, hell he'd only known because he'd been there, and so he was expecting to apologize to his girlfriend for leaving her again. He wasn't expecting to learn that he was a father. The apple pie life was one that he always figured would end up working perfectly for Sam, he had never pictured it for himself, and he didn't know what to do about it now.

"If anyone else finds out about her you're both going to be in a lot of danger." He said, frowning slightly. He and Sam had managed to make quite a few enemies over the years, the most recent thorn in their side being Crowley, and could only imagine the kind of field day he'd have if he found out. "You ran." He shook his head in disbelief. He was certain that his brother could have done a bit more to look for her or go after her, but they were both kind of at fault here. "Sam's the only family we have left, and you ran. Dammit, Bailey, you could have gotten hurt! Or worse..."

Sam wished that he could come right out and tell Catriona everything right now. And by everything he meant everything he did from hunting monsters to saving people to always finding a way to bring his brother back from the dead usually. Because saving people and hunting things was the family business, or at least his family's business. He and Dean and grown up on the road with their dad always hunting the next monster and saving the next person in line. And in the end, even though it wasn't what Sam had wanted then and it wasn't what he wanted to do until it was finally too late for him to save himself or even just settle down and attempt to have a normal life, he knew it was what he had to do. Because it's what he's always done. Sam wasn't sure how she'd react though if he did tell her. He could still remember how Bailey had reacted when Dean had told her the truth. Which Sam was still in shock that Dean had told her the truth, really he was in shock that he'd kept her around that long, but regardless she hadn't taken it well at first. Though finding out the person you love hunts monsters that you didn't think were real is kind of a lot to take in.

"That sounds like a plan," Sam said smiling at his wonderful girlfriend as they finished grabbing everything else before sitting down at the table to eat the food and drink the coffee. Two things Sam was very thankful for because without breakfast and coffee he wasn't sure he'd be able to function the rest of the day. Which may have sounded ridiculous given he'd already been to the library once, but he knew he'd start to crash soon if he didn't have something to keep him going. And if he crashed this early then there would be no way that he'd be able to go out for his run later that day. So really breakfast and coffee were kind of what kept him going every day. It was part of his routine, and he'd rather not break that.

---

Bailey ran her fingers through her hair and let out a sigh, "I understand what could've happened if one of the many enemies you and Sam have made over the years found out but they didn't. And even if they had I don't know how much help Sam really would've been. Because of no offense to your brother or anything Dean but I felt safer without him anyways. I mean he was in a really dark place after you disappeared. There were nights I didn't even see him because he was off drinking or something. We didn't see one another that often as it was. Because while I was busy going to dr. appointments and trying to keep myself together so I didn't lose the baby from stress or God knows what else Sam was off being in his dark place not letting me help him get better." Bailey told him wishing she could get through to Dean that as much as she loved Sam it was best this way. And Bailey would never say that Sam was an awful person who didn't make her feel safe because Sam had always been there. He was an amazing person, who had never made her feel unsafe. However, she did have to admit that losing Dean took a toll on him. And the way he reacted was much different than she'd expected, and as much as Bailey had wanted to react just like Sam and try to drink her pain away she couldn't because she had a baby to worry about.

"You're home now, though, so unless this is your way of telling me that you don't want to be in our lives I think we'll all be okay," Bailey said knowing that with Dean back if he did stick around them they'd probably have a target on their backs. After all, if Dean did want to be active in his daughter's life he had two more people aside from Sam that his enemies could go after to get to him. However, there was strength in numbers and so maybe if they could find Sam and all of them could stick together and maybe finding somewhere extra safe like a bunker or something they could make things work out. And maybe then the apple pie life that was being presented to Dean the way it was wouldn't be such a scary thought.

@ sam winchester.

Catriona didn't know very much about Sam's brother at all. She knew that he was the oldest of the two and that his name was Dean and that he'd pretty much raised Sam, but that was it. She never really pushed her boyfriend to talk too much about him or the rest of his family for that matter. She had been able to see from day one that it was a touchy subject for him, and she never wanted to force him to talk about it or anything along those lines. She could tell that he told her what he wanted to tell her in regards to the subject, and she respected the fact that there were just certain things that he didn't like talking about, his family being one of those things.

She could tell that looking for his brother's girlfriend was important to him though, and if Sam wanted her help then she would help him look for her. She didn't know if it was going to be an easy task or not, but she figured two sets of eyes would be better than one, and if they both put a great deal of effort in then chances were that they'd find her or at least find a clue as to where she might have gone. "When was the last time you spoke to her?" She asked curiously as she started eating her food. He had never mentioned his brother's girlfriend before, let alone the fact that he had a niece or nephew out there in the world somewhere too, so this was all honestly news for her, and she couldn't help being at least a little bit curious.

---

Dean frowned. He had figured that his brother and Bailey would have stuck together while he was gone, but that obviously wasn't the case. This wasn't the first time that something had separated him and Sam though, and he had expected his brother to keep an eye on his girlfriend for him at least. "Did he try looking for me?" He asked curiously though something told him that he already knew the answer to his question just based off of how he'd described the shape Sam had been in after he and Cass had kind of just disappeared. He wanted to think that Sam had looked for him, even though they both always said to move on with life and get out of the hunting life if something were to happen to one of them, but neither of them had ever followed that rule in the past so he didn't know why Sam would choose to do so now.

"Of course that's what I want, but this is a lot to take in all at once, Bailey. I expected to come back and find you and Sam looking out for each other. I didn't expect to come back and find Sam off in who the hell knows where and you with a kid." Dean sighed, running a hand over his face. He knew that his words were a bit harsh, but it was the truth. He honestly didn't know what to make of any of this right now, and a drink was sounding better and better with every freaking second that passed.

"Well it's been a while since we've spoken," Sam said over his breakfast, wishing his answer was different. He would give almost anything right now to be able to say that he'd stuck with Bailey after Dean disappeared and they were both happy in life. In reality, however, he knew he was happy with Catriona but he didn't know much else. He'd kind of done the one thing he and Dean always promised they'd do if one of them died but never actually stuck with. He'd found a way to move on from the life of a hunter. And it'd been great for a while, but now he was starting to question it all again. He was starting to wonder if this was the right choice, and he was really curious to if Bailey and the baby were okay and where they were.

Maybe he'd find them, see that they were okay and happy, and he'd be okay and be able to keep going on with the life he was currently living. Honestly, he wasn't sure if it was selfish to hope that's how it turned out or not. And it wasn't because he hated Dean, or was glad he was gone since those things weren't true. It was because being a hunter was tiring. It was hard never having a steady place to stay, or always having to be on the go after the next supernatural being that decided to bring about havoc on. And Sam had never wanted that life. For as long as he could remember he'd wanted nothing more than to get away from that life and have something like what he had right now.

---

Bailey tucked her hair behind her ear and bit her lip. "I don't know if he did after I left or not. But I know we talked about looking for you the few times we were around one another and he wasn't drunk. I would've done it myself but I didn't even know where to start and had no idea what I was even looking at or for, for that matter." She told him hoping at Sam at least tried to look for Dean once, but honestly, she didn't know if he had or not. Because well she hadn't kept in touch with him even if she probably should have.

She ran her hands over her face, "well, believe me, Dean, this wasn't exactly what I'd pictured myself doing over the last year. And it sure as hell wasn't something I pictured myself doing alone," She said pinching the bridge of her nose realizing that she'd been a little harsh as well. After all, it wasn't like he'd had a choice about how he'd spent the last year, so it wasn't like he'd just bailed on them because he couldn't handle it or something. "I'm sorry. This whole thing is a lot to take in and you've been through a lot over the last year, and me adding more to your already filled plate probably isn't what you want or need right now," she said sighing and pushing her fingers through her hair before she turned towards the kitchen. "Do you want some pie?"

@ sam winchester.


also I'll try and respond to the Fantastic Beasts roleplay tomorrow if you still wanna do that one!