Funny School Moments

English class yesterday was hilarious.

Lawrence: (to me) Hey Sav, do you remember that song, 'Where Is The Love'?
Me: Uh, yeah. Of course I do.
Lawrence: Well where is the love!
Me: -draws heart in English book and point to it- There is the love, Lawrence. There.

And a little later.
Lawrence: Sav, do you like 50 Cent?
Me: No.
Lawrence: Iz it coz he iz black? (No word of a lie, that's how he said it. )
Me: No, it's because he's a rapper.
Lawrence: Iz it coz I iz black?
Me: No, you're white and ginger.
Lawrence: IZ IT COZ I IZ BLACK?
Nathan: Yes Lawrence, it's because you're black. NOW SHUT UP. -_-

Good times.

My choir teacher, Mr. Heyburn, always has to tell this kid, Josh, to sit up straight. Josh is a very big kid, and this is important to know.

Heyburn: Josh, sit up!
Josh: I am sitting up!
Heyburn: No you're not!
Josh: I just have a very small torso...
Heyburn, scoffing: The one thing you don't have is a small torso, Josh.
Class:
Josh: Is that a fat joke?
Class: !

Adam: *Starts mocking the country music genre by singing in a Southern voice and making up the words as he goes along.*
Conner: Do you have something against country music, Adam?
Adam: YES.
Me: . .

And, omg, this was last year, but it was fucking hilarious.

Mrs. Patten & Javier: *Speak to each other in Spanish.*
Chris: . . . . Is that a fat joke?!
Class: .

Becky: Ms Ball, are you a lesbian?
Ms Ball: Yes
Becky: Ms Ball, have you ever been tempted to look in our changing rooms then?
Ms Ball: No. Get out. I'll see you after.
*Becky leaves - awkward silence*
Lizzie: Don't worry Ms Ball, she only said those things because she didn't do her homework.

One of those had to be there moments, but the way Lizzie said that so politely just made me die. xD

Hmm, there are many but the time our R.E teacher chased Lewis down four flights of stairs had to be one of the highlights.

The whole class ran out after them just to watch. Lewis took a shortcut and got back to us before the teacher at the top floor. Our teacher was at the 2nd floor and didn't notice Lewis. He pushed the head teacher out of the way and leapt down to the next floor.

We all went back to our class. We were all sitiing with our backs all straight and our arms in front of us with huge grins on our faces when the teacher came back, red in the face, panting and clutching his back.

He had to go home to "lie down".

Hmm...can't think of any of the top of my head.
But in band, we have a "that's what she said" moment at least twice a day. xD

In geometry, my math teacher drew a crooked angle.

Amy and I: Your angle isn't straight.
Ms. Gentile: WELL I'M NOT STRAIGHT!
Class:

Now we all have something to hold against her.

And in english class, we were discussing Romeo and Juliet.

Mrs. Hazelnis: So, what do you do when you like someone?
Me: Seduce them.
Class:

And another time, we were talking about celebrities.

Mrs. Hazelnis: So, boys. what celebrity do you think is attractive, or like?
Andrew: Megan Fox.
Mrs. Hazelnis: Okay, does anyone disagree?
Boys: (Shake heads.)
Mrs. Hazelnis: Alright then.
Patterson: Excuse me, who's Megan Fox?
Me: Are you kidding? Do you not watch television?
Patterson: I don't watch a lot of movies!
Mrs. Hazelnis: Okay, girls, which celebrity do you like?
Me: (Mumbles)Shia LaBeouf.(End of mumbling) WHAT? Who said that?
Class:

Shia's the sex. ^^ .

Me: *Amazing Sandra by opening my mouth and closing it, because I'd just gotten my metal wear adjusted, as my jaw's been broken.*
Matt: Oh, wow, she's opening her mouth. So cool.
Me: My jaw's broken.
Matt: . . . . Oh.

thedisappearinggirl.:

Shia's the sex. ^^ .

THIS.

--

We had many hilarious moments in Physics lessons in high school, since our teacher- intentionally or not- seemed to be full of sexual innuendos.

Mr K: (explaining something to the class)
William: *picks his pen up and makes it stand vertically on his folder*
Mr K: *stops talking* ...Sorry, I got distracted by William's erection.
Class:

And another time we were learning about how plugs work, so we all got a plug each and had to take the tops off them, take the wires out and rewire them.

Rhiannon: Sir, I'm done rewiring! Shall I close the top?
Mr K: No, no, keep your top off, I want to take a look first!
Class:

Last week in Aquatic Science, me and a couple of guys were changing the water in one of the fish tanks. We had the bright idea of pouring the water down the drain thing that you use to wash your eyes out if you were to get chemicals in your eyes. We thought the drain led to a pipe like the sinks do, but it just spilled out onto the floor and we got water everywhere.

We had to stay after class and dry the floor.

I just remembered something else. Last year, a girl was walking down the hall between classes and a dildo fell out of her bag. She didn't realize it fell out and everyone was laughing when they saw the dildo on the ground. Finally a teacher picked it up and threw it out.

Today in biology someone had to pick a random noun and the picked chair and it was put into the sentence 'An embryo is like a chair because ....' and sir said the funniest (not rudest) would win and I won with 'an embryo is like a chair because you need wood to create both' , the looks some of the boys gave me

In Bio:

Mr. Sell: Well, we all know Bob hates women.
Bob: And white people, don't forget white people.
Will: But you're white, so...
Bob: Whatchu say, whitey?!
Class:

Bob is white and a ginger.

My friend is trying to find every single google in ICT lessons , he's onto i some of the country names
In PE me and the same boy were chasing eachother round and being generally stupid , he's an awesome friend :D
The other day in science my friend said
'Careful it's friday the 15th'
We were confused till she said
'y'know friday the 15th cursed and what-not'
we twigged she meant friday the 13th , it was so funny.

In english class once again, we were finishing up Romeo and Juliet.
Mrs. Hazelnis: So, when Romeo walks into the mausoleum, what is the first thing that he notices?
Me: That Juliet isn't moving.
Mrs. Hazelnis: Well, Aliyah, don't you think that all the dead people in there aren't moving?
Me: I guess so.
Class:

My Bio class named our classroom's heater George.
It growls and Will and Michelle kick it to shut it up.

my friends and i always does weird, hilarious dance moves outside our class when there's no one around yet people can still see us from across the block. it's embarrassing sometimes -.-

Today, in Science, we had an experiment, which involved test tubes A, B and C, Needless to say, the were renamed Annie, Bob and Chris.
And the Bunsen Burner is known as Jake.......

One time in biology, this one dude banged his shin against a table leg and yelled, "Ow, my SHIN!" real loud. Then the teacher just looked at him funny for a second and said, "Did you just cuss?" Then the kid freaked out and said, "No, no, I said SHIN!"

And then, in fourth period history we have this stupid enrichment half-hour that we're supposed to be reading in - nobody does. Most of us eat lunch or do homework; one day a girl was eating a sub she got at Subway or whatever and she dropped a pickle that apparently came with her sub. Now, my history teacher comes from Romania and has a funny accent, and when the pickle hit the floor, she said, "Now who's gonna pick that pickle up? Come on."
It sounded weird.

As bitchy as my English teacher always is, her class is the funniest class of my day. Simply because of Keefer.

I used to call him "Our school's own personal The Rev" before Jimmy died because his personality is so much like Jimmy's was. When we were reading "Hamlet," Keefer insisted on playing the part of "Rosencrantz." Instead of going by "Rosencrantz", he insisted that he be called "Rosenkeefer" instead. XD

And a couple of days ago, he just randomly said:
"Hmm. Nothing to do you say, Ms. Scott? I vote we go outside and play kickball. Oh...wait, we don't have a ball...But...We have desks. Let's play 'kickdesk.' We'll kick our desks around, Ms. Scott!"

He never fails to make me laugh.

My Earth Science teacher, Mr. Williams is a freak, and went on with this discussion about Green House gases in class.

Mr. Williams: You know what the strangest green house gas is? Methane. You wanna know where methane comes from?
Me: (Whispering) No.
Mr. Williams: COW FARTS! Methane comes from cow farts! And people ask: "How in the heck do you regulate cow farts!?" (Proceeds to make farting noises.)
Brooke: (Pretends to shoot herself.)
Mr. Williams: (Still making farting noises.)
Class: .....