kelliclndstn / Comments

Ohh what are you stuck on?
I might be able to help! haha.

Haha It won't.
It makes me laugh though!
Ohh and I think it works wonderfully for you! haha

Haha Ohh yeahh.
Though people are taking bets on how long it'll take Mike to like me.
Though I don't see it ever happening. Haha.
And I really do like yours.
I love Lady gaga & I know you do too! haha

Haha Yeppers :]
I'm working on my George story now and then I'll probably start on the new Original story! haha.

And thanks hunny :]

How are we gonna go ten days without causing mischief? Haha.
And I I'm probably gonna start reading Aerials some time over this week. Haha.

KELLI!
I'mma miss you over spring break!

hey there,
I can't remember if you subscribed or not, but if you did, I've just updated Breakfast at Holly's. : )

I know a girl who is like that too. She puts her stories up, but the moment she gets a bad review she says things like "oh everyone hates me and I'm an awful writer I should never write ever again."
Uh, that't not what the review said, but whatever. -.-'
Some people can't take critisism, and that annoys me.

Yeah, I'm sure if you look around the forum you could find someone that's willing to help you out. :)

I didn't mean to sound bitchy by the way, but the color was hurting my eyes so I thought I'd mention it. x]

I'm glad you took the critisism like that, because I didn't mean to put you off writing, but just give you help to becoming a better writer. I rather get some critisism I can work with, rather than just "loved it" from a 13-year-old that writes the same comment on every story she reads.

If you have a type of dyslexia, what you could do is find someone to BETA for you. That'd make things a lot easier for you, I used to have a BETA back when I started writing and sometimes I missed the mistakes I'd made. But now, due to having been writing and posting for years I can do it myself. I still make mistakes obviously, but I've come a long way as an author. Practise makes perfect. ^_^

Hey, thanks for the comment on my story. Could I ask you something though? Why on earth is your font that horrible color? You do know it's impossible to read without highlighting, right? x]

You're welcome, dear :)

you are very welcome!!

Thanks so much for the comment on Dear Nobody, it really made my day

thanks for that suggestion but i was a bit confused with the last part. Callie just met her Aunt Anna for the first time in that chatper so wouldnt you comment about nice apply? or would it still be best to go on an describe it?

The whole "nice red convertible" thing wasn't in quotes; your character wasn't saying it to the aunt, so it seemed like a description (or lack there of).

Someone else reviewed thet chapter said it was great because it would be left the imagination to picture it. Would it be better to imagine it in your own way or going into a better descrption?

There's a difference between putting in too much description and putting too little. Right now, there isn't enough; you need to give description so there's a shape to what you're showing, but not so much that the reader is bogged down by your description. It's up to you to find that line.

Two grammar mistakes you mentioned weren't actually mistakes. At the end of a block of dialog, if the character starts a new paragraph within his dialog, you leave the end quotes off the first paragraph and open quotes in the second paragraph. That's how I was taught. Also, this:

“I’m just saying,” I continue “this is our junior year, and our school is making it a huge deal! Like we don’t have lives outside that hell hole.”

The comma after continue belongs there. Not having a comma is actually grammatically incorrect.

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Also, the fragments are intentional. I am aware as to what a fragment is, and it can also be used as a literary device to make short, choppy, sentences. Which is 100% intentional in that paragraph.

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Also, I would suggest watching your own grammar when you review people's stories. Just saying :)

Damn, it's hard to comment on your page. Where are the links? XD

Anyway, thanks for the review on Varicose Fangs. I'm going over it now, trying to edit it up.

The bleach is used to clean up the blood.

Oh, wow. I feel like an idiot now lol.

I didn't take heed that your post said to review chapter two or three, and I did four. Whoops lol

Hey. Can you post the review you wrote for "Swagger" on the story's comment page, por favor?