Honestly, I think they both sound like tools. I'd never let other girls hang over me. That's just disrespectful. If he really liked you, he wouldn't want or let other girls on him. That's not a good guy. And as for the 'friends with benefits' guy, he's just using you. But letting you know that he's using you. Which in my book, I think is even worse. Letting him, that makes you sound/feel cheap. And you're not a cheap girl. You're very lovely and deserve to be treated as such. I think you should hold out for a guy that's willing to hold out for you.
But that's just my opinion..