November 18th, 2008 at 06:39am
Dear Brandi,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it that night you picked your nose in your closet and I saw you carve your initials into my salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that I may pee my pants. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep the results of that blood-sample as a memory.You should also know that I will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.
Go drown yourself,
Lizzle.
It made my stomach feel all warm and fuzzy.
Hahaha, I almost made a Ben remark...you can only imagine.
You need to upload an avatar.
Do it.