Although I admire the reference to David and Goliath, I am wondering if a Trojan War reference would have been more fitting to this idea of people charging into death (But that might be due to my huge crush on Hector.) But, you know, it's your creative leave. And I love the idea of Goliath's perspective, even metaphorically, this larger-than-life being that knows he must fall.
Basically, great job. I love the themes of war explored in new-ish ways.
I like the old testament allusion, and the personification of Time. Your Time was so personified i could see it sitting and intently reading this poem with me
Basically, great job. I love the themes of war explored in new-ish ways.