Calling Your Name - Comments

Are you in a band? This is really good. Out of the three I've read I think this is my favorite. Probably because I relate to it, that sense of the person who you thought would be there but let you down. I hear guitar in background going to this song. :D This is seriously deep.

Oh, also, the lines from "Now I'm free" down to "the silence won't color me" are my favorite part. :D

I like the end a lot, and the counting is a cool concept! The story it tells is excellent, deep, even. You have done a great job writing this!
Also, I like the rhythm. It's a bit different from some of the rhythms I've seen before, and I kind of had my thumb tapping along to it, which doesn't normally happen. Very cool! :)

if you get used, you honestly do get a lack of compassion
really like the chorus, a lot actually
i like closer to the end where there is some happiness to it :)
i like the counting thing in some parts of it
I really did like that! overall, very good :D

"1, 2, 3, wipe my eyes
4, 5, 6, take back lies
7, 8, 9, today I rise.
10..."

I like that part alot! I really like this. I can totally relate to it believe me.

There's a small spelling error. "I'm fresh a a daisy" There should be an 'as', right? That's just a small error but it's something that sets the reader off, specially in lyrics. Other than that, I really liked this. It seems as though, she's struggling between loving and hating a person. She tells herself that she won't let things affect her, but as I can see, it is getting to her. Again, another lovely piece of work!

that's deep I like this poem the most
truthfuly this is deep it tells a story