Impotent - Comments

This poem is full of wonderful ideas and phrases and I have to say, the repetition does not pull from the strength and meaning, rather emphasizes the fact that humanity is weak and lacking in so many things. Your word choice is great and it just adds to what you're trying to say. There are a few spelling/grammar issues, but that happens when typing and sometimes they are intentional (sometimes I just can't tell). All in all this is a great poem! I especially like how you pull certain things to greater attention by capitalizing them. It just adds to the meaning!

[i]Let us fall victim to its Lame Walk, its Rhythmless Walce so great,[/i]

Love that line. It stuck in my head the whole time that I was reading the poem. This one was a lot shorter than all of the others I've read so far. It seems almost weird not having to scroll to read it. >.< Your word choice was very good though. It was as if the worlds were rolling off of my mind's tongue of their own accord. Very musical in its arrangement.

I enjoy the word choice and meaning here it's quite thick but so naturally spoken. I'm surprised this hasn't been commented. I also like how the first part of every line has a cap no cap pattern till the end. I'm not sure if that part was intentional or not but it does cause for it to be more striking. I really adored this and will be checking out more of your works.

I think your style is refreshing and I hope it's not altered too drastically from poem to poem like mine is lol.