I love the way you cut the lines in this, letting certain images linger in our minds before flowing on to the next one. I also love the concept of this, comparing aeroplanes and blimps to birds and bees, and it was executed beautifully. I especially love the last stanza, the image just makes me smile. My only criticisms are that I think you could maybe think of a better word for "boring" in "our boring ways of flight", and I'm not too sure about "though a wonder all the same to you and I" the wording seems a little off. Otherwise, it's absolutely gorgeous.
June 29th, 2011 at 02:21pm
