The Edge of September - Comments

This poem is really heartbreaking (particularly the last verse) and you've done an amazing job at evoking the pain of losing a loved one. The language used definitely makes the piece very powerful, and the references to memories help convey the grief. And I really love the vivid language you use here; it really helps picture they way your friendship developed, and adds to the sadness.

My only criticism is that some of the rhymes are a little off, (particularly gone/drawn in the first verse). But other than that, I think this piece is very well-written, and you've done a great job with it.

This poem sounds similar to Valediction just more resigned I guess you could say. I don't know if they concern the same individual or not but when I read January of 06 I went back and looked at the other poem. That one being posted in January as well (different year obviously) is what made me think they were about the same person. If they are concerning the same person it makes me feel like you can't let go of them. Please don't be upset with me for saying that. I can't really talk with not letting the deceased go though; there's plenty I myself still hold onto. I looked at all of your poems before commenting on these three. I like them all but these three that I've commented on affected me the most. Similar reactions to them all though which may be why.