The Sound of a Tornado - Comments

The last line killed. Absolutely took my breath away. It really made me smile.

Wow. At first I thought it kinda had a southern feel to it, with her having known what a tornado sounded like and whatnot. I really enjoyed the narration and the speaker's absent little thoughts - like counting the number of people in the station, or expecting the tracks to trap her when she stepped on them - and I thought it gave her a humbling bit of character to have come all the way to a train station in the middle of the night dressed in high heels and a nice jacket.

And the last stanza was PERFECT. Like, I don't even know what to say about it. It seems like every other detail we've learned about the speaker thus far is simply invalid just because of the last line. It took me off guard and was so humbling and honest and genuine. I loved it.

Once again, spectacular writing. :)

Ahh, this is good. The narration really drew me in and made me feel connected to the narrator, which rarely happens for me. I also like how you incorporated a lot of imagery with the stream-of-consciousness without completely overwhelming the reader. It's so balanced and absolutely lovely.

Wow, that was really honest and beautiful, I really loved it.

:D i love it !