I like that layout! and you're right, it does look much better when the comments are hidden. And that scene you talked about. The girl kissing her dead lover's lips. I kind of get a sense of that when I read:
"His lips are dry, I've never felt my soul want to cry.
And that scene you talked about. The girl kissing her dead lover's lips. I kind of get a sense
of that when I read:
I've never felt my soul want to cry.