Exposed. - Comments

Great title and great subject matter, beauty to me does not lie on the outside of ones body, it’s what lies within, I love how you described how they looked, the poking and prying. When you declared yourself a work of art which is so true, we are all wonderfully made, we all feel exposed, naked or unpretty but what matters is how you feel about yourself. I love the flow of this poem, and subject matter at hand is one that could help girls. The imagery within poem was perfect, you awoke to discovery it was just a dream, but for many girls this subject matter is reality. Thanks for sharing.

@ EmptySighsAndWine
I'm glad you did write it!

@ XSoulXLoverX
Ah, thank you very much. I don't write much poetry because I'm more of a person to write prose. I felt the need to write this though. ^^;

@ AmorarEsDeVivir
Thank you. This was just literally something I wrote without thinking. Like I said, I had a dream about it and I really didn't think twice about writing about it until a little while ago.

The imagery in this is really powerful. I like the contrast between the speaker declaring herself a "work of art" and the people probing declaring a lack of beauty despite that. The way it's worded does a really great job of explaining what it's like to feel like your body is on display unwillingly.

There were a couple lines where the phrasing felt a little awkward. I think that may have been due to the punctuation, for the most part. The frequent punctuation contributes to a general halting feeling, which works for the poem, but there are also times where the placement of commas and periods (or commas where periods might benefit or vice versa) makes it so that the ideas don't flow in a connected enough manner to be easily understood.

Also, in terms of content, I felt like the last stanza kind of drew me out of the poem. Exposing the whole thing as a dream made me personally feel like the whole thing became less real, less vivid, less important.

On a more personal note, I'm about the same body type as you are, and I rock the hell out of it. I'm sure you do too. =P

Wow. Wow. Wow. I mean I'm trying to find another word to describe this poem, but it's all I can think of. I think you are so talented.

This poem is perfect. The rhyme helps with the flow of things and it was just so perfect. The title, the content, the passion you brought through in your diction was impeccable. Women are often exposed to this fear of never being beautiful enough or ever being seen as the perfect idea of beauty and you captured this perfectly with this poem. The way you wrote it really made this powerful. It was so wonderfully thought out and then the ending really made have that final pop and element of surprise that the poem really benefited from. Your line breaks were absolute perfection and I adored that you managed to create something so wonderful.

Wow. Wow. Wow. I mean I'm trying to find another word to describe this poem, but it's all I can think of. I think you are so talented.

This poem is perfect. The rhyme helps with the flow of things and it was just so perfect. The title, the content, the passion you brought through in your diction was impeccable. Women are often exposed to this fear of never being beautiful enough or ever being seen as the perfect idea of beauty and you captured this perfectly with this poem. The way you wrote it really made this powerful. It was so wonderfully thought out and then the ending really made have that final pop and element of surprise that the poem really benefited from. Your line breaks were absolute perfection and I adored that you managed to create something so wonderful.

This made me feel disappointed about the women of today. This is exactly I feel sometimes, but my heart and soul is stronger to have weakness. I show beauty how I can show it, I don't need any man or woman to tell me what I am because I am beautiful as I am. I don't need any man to crave for me, I accept myself as I am and will choose the right man that wants me for me and not use my body and heart for desire. Be beautiful as you are, who cares what people say because no one should be talking. Most of the women are insecure about not having men to desire them. Don't be like those women that are labeled. I loved this poem, very inspiring and excellent.